So upset at school offer

[kathjee]

Actually sat here crying, sounds so silly. But DS got his third choice, which I was never keen on and is far away.

All his friends got 1st choice and so happy and messaging in the watsapp grp. He's going to be gutted when he gets home from school.

I know we can appeal but iv also heard they are rarely successful. Can anyone help or advise re appeals pls? I feel like we always have such bad luck in these things, without sounding cliche it does always seem to be us who don't get first choices etc 😭.

I get your disappointment.

We were in a similar position last year but for primary school.

My daughter was placed in our 4th option. I have no experience with the appeals process as I decided to just see what happened with the waiting lists. She was very far down on the list for our 1st option so I sort of gave up hope. But a few days after the waiting lists opened she was in fact offered a place at that school. So don't give up hope OP.

Try not to take it personally. It’s really strictly done on that school’s admissions policy. If you think that children who live further away got the school when you didn’t, it might be because they have an EHCP, or a sibling at the school (if there’s sibling priority), or that they might have a parent who lives closer (I.e if parents are divorced).

I don’t think the school will know where you put them (1st, 3rd etc).

I agree re waiting lists too, they move fast.

@Hiddenmyname we are thinking private school too. It was an option, but obviously an expensive option. Good to know you got a place at the school, did you go with it or with private in the end?

As others have said your order of preference makes no difference. the schools all decide based on their own criteria on all choices and you are then given your highest preference of the ones you got a place for.

but honestly don’t despair

1. go and have a look at the one you got. Research it- you might actually find you like it
2. find out where you are on waiting list. They do move. Private school pupils drop out over the next few months and free up places.

i know someone who got her place the day before the start of term. Obviously had all the uniform for the original school so had to frantically get the new uniform in time. All worked out in the end. Honestly lots can happen between now and September.

and remember all ends up being ok one way or another.

My DD is also not white and we chose her school based on a mix of ethnicity and I know other MNers will come on and say "don't be silly, race means nothing" but it doesn't mean nothing.
It does sound odd that you didn't get second choice - can you paste the admissions criteria for 2nd choice, which sounds a good one for you, maybe anonymising them (e.g. if you are Jewish removing that and putting "faith" in, removing the name of the LEA).

You're not alone. My child got third choice, their feeder school which doesn't have a great reputation but my eldest went there and did well, plus it's nearby so there are some positives. However, I do admit to being a bit sad when this morning I found out that most of the kids in the class got their first choice and are all going to the same school. One of the children who got our first choice lives next door and it's not a school based on exam results or religion. I'm just trying to focus on the positives but I do feel down about it. Everyone else seems to just get what they want when it comes to school choices and my kids are rejected.

It is no longer true that mid term transfers get new spaces faster than those on the waiting list. The only circumstances in which a mid term transfer can jump the waiting list are if they have an EHCP naming the school, or they have failed to get a place through the usual admission process and fall into one of the groups covered by the Fair Access Protocol (e.g. they have moved into the area, have been out of education for at least four weeks and there are no places available at any school within a reasonable distance).

I can remember the disappointment with mine and they're in their 20s now (twins). By July they had both got into the school we wanted (bit of a hairy wait when one got in and the other took a few more weeks). As others have said, there is a lot of movement in the next few months.

Now the school we didn't want is the most in demand in this area.

Re the faith school, I did think it was a low chance but 30% chance is still a chance! We are of a religion so were able to fill out the supplementary form but it's obviously just luck. I think I'm disheartened as I really thought he would get the second choice at least, eventhough back of my head I just thought 'I bet we don't get that either'

Interesting regarding the mid term transfer. My kids got in mid term at their primary school but apparently there's a waiting list for it. Although maybe there wasn't back then (2020).

The LA said we won't know where we are on the list until 1st April. But we are on the list for the first 2. In the meantime we will appeal.

Not gna even utter any disappointment to my boy, he will pick it up. Iv not shown any preference to him when we have been applying etc just because of reasons like this. Been burnt too many times.

He does like the Grammar school though lol, but explained re costs so he's aware that might also not be an option

Make sure you are on the waiting list and keep pushing. There’s still time.
If you can find out where you are exactly on the list that might help.
I’m so sorry this has happened

What grammar school? Is it private f there are costs?

I was in your position OP. Every single other kid in my DC's class went to their 1st choice. I was crying, gutted, felt terrible. He was upset initially too, of course. In the end he went to the 2nd place, it's fine, he made friends, he's happy. First couple of weeks when he knew no-body were a bit tricky, but it's a short phase. he doesn't see any of his old school mates.

In my opinion, the appeal process is a just a sop to pacify parents and give them something to do and 'feel heard' but it's just a numbers game and a formula they apply. My older DC got into the 1st choice school 8 years earlier, from same feeder school and home address, but there' more kids in the immediate catchment area now.

I know it feels really awful now, but in the big scheme of things it will almost certainly be less of a big deal for all of you, than it seems.

Sorry I just saw you can’t find out about the waiting list for another month.
appeal definitely

Re the faith school, I did think it was a low chance but 30% chance is still a chance! We are of a religion so were able to fill out the supplementary form but it's obviously just luck.

I’d be really surprised if it was just luck. Most faith secondary schools are really explicit about what is required, either that you need to show a certain level of attendance at a particular church/ churches, that you need a reference from the vicar, or even in some cases that you’ve played a long standing role in the religious community that the school is part of. It’s normally set out clearly in the admissions policy. But faith crossover isn’t a given- for example London Oratory is really clear that only Catholic religious criteria will apply.

"The second school, we are within catchment and religion"

Are you definitely in catchment? And how close are you to the school?

Double check the admissions criteria. Look at the admissions info for previous years. It doesn't make sense that he wouldn't get a place at his catchment school unless it is very oversubscribed and you're further away than others in catchment. If there are religious criteria, assume that your religion is not the primary religion of the school, but still given priority over non-religious applicants?

Re the faith school, I did think it was a low chance but 30% chance is still a chance! We are of a religion so were able to fill out the supplementary form but it's obviously just luck.

It will be down to how many applicants of the primary faith, how many sibling applicants, how many other faith applicants who live closer than you they got this year.

By 30% chance, do you mean that in 3 of the last 10 years, someone of your faith at your distance with no sibling preference would have got in?

It's ridiculous in this day and age that we still allow religious discrimination in the admissions processes for state schools.

If you do appeal there is a useful guide by child law advice, I think it's £2 IIRC.
https://childlawadvice.org.uk/information-pages/school-admissions/#elementor-toc__heading-anchor-25

I looked extensively at criteria and how it is allocated when we applied.
The school will have a policy on their website explaining it. For example they will say it is allocated like this:

1. Pupils with needs that have specified the school
2. Siblings
3. Teachers who are parents
4. Can be things like a stream for ability in music or sports or some other criteria.
5. Catchment , which changes depending on how many places are left after the above criteria has been filled

I calculate that there would be about 150 places left to alocate by catchment from our 274 place secondary school after all the other places are allocated before hand. You can see average percentages online.

It worked out in our secondary that there is between a 1 and 1.2 mile catchment each year, changing depending on how many other places get allocated.

We moved nearer to our chosen secondary in year 4 to ensure a place as I wasn't sure we would get in otherwise. So moved hpuse at great expense which we could not really afford. It is a school that none of his friends went to as well, but the other school option had terrible issues and my son has SEN but no ECHP so doesnt get a preference, so we couldn't take a chance on it.

He has really enjoyed making new friends. I would say that children these days are more worldy wise and interested in different cultures. So hopefully he won't feel as out of place as you did when you were at school.

im not sure if this is true but I heard somewhere not to put a choice for number 1 you aren’t likely to get as it affects your chances of getting choice two, something like all the first choices are allocated. Your second choice school could be full (with kids actually further away) before second choices come round. So that’s why maybe you didn’t get second over other kids who put that school as top priority

A bit of a thread diversion but it does seem impossible to convince people that the preference order makes no difference to the chances of getting an offer.

DD now at uni but I remember I could never convince other parents of this back in the day.

One parent I knew insisted on telling a school head how religious they were even though that school (although C of E) didn't prioritise faith in admissions.

It doesn't help that some schools seem to deliberately mislead - at least two heads in their Open Day talks we attended told the assembled parents that "you need to make us your first choice" to get into the school.

To offer some kind of hope/reassurance ' try the waiting list. My son got offered 5th choice, stayed on waiting list & got in to 1st choice from being 25th on waiting list. This was end of June. A few years ago, but I have not forgotten the stress!

If you allow faith schools to exist, you have to allow them to be selective based on religion, otherwise they're completely pointless. You might object to faith schools full stop (or the fact that they are state-funded) but that's a different debate.

I'm not religious myself but don't have a problem with being low priority to get my kids into a faith school.

That isn't how it works and is against the Admissions code.