Friends not sponsoring dh

[Primmyhill]

Ok, I know times are hard and there are loads of people asking for sponsorship etc but I’m just a bit hacked off. In the past I’ve sponsored friends kids for things like walking around the playground at lunch time, sponsored silence etc, you get my drift but there’s been loads over the last few years and I always give £10-20. My husband is doing a huge challenge in April and the sponsorship has been live for months and I’ve sent the link out twice and not one of them has sponsored him. None of them are badly off - they just can’t be bothered I reckon and I’m pretty annoyed. AIBU? Would you do? I’ll know better next time when darling Henry wants money for pushing his teddy around the local f’ing playing field.

YANBU - mean buggers

Money would have to be extremely tight for me not to bung a tenner his way - and I am a single mum with limited capacity to work.

Depends what it is - if it’s a holiday with a challenge attached (where the fundraising is effectively covering the cost of the trip) eg trek the Great Wall of China then I’m always reluctant to contribute. If it’s running a marathon in this country or similar then I’ll sponsor. You’re within your rights not to sponsor anyone in future though, if they haven’t responded to your request for sponsorship.

Honestly, I’d only do this sort of thing if it was a charity that I was passionate about. I’m sure MND is an important cause, but it hasn’t touched me personally, so I probably wouldn’t. If I do a race on a charity place, I’d just pay the minimum myself and then anything else is a bonus I’d be grateful for.

Wow there are some very cynical tight arses on this thread!!

I’m not demanding at all but after the hundreds I’ve spent not only on kids but other adult challenges too, I didn’t think it was too much to ask for it to be reciprocated. But I accept I’m probably wrong due to the responses I’ve had and will take it on the chin.

It depends what the challenge is. It sounds like it could be London Marathon. I never sponsor this far out, usually a week or so before. Especially if it’s someone one beyond immediate (friend’s husband) which seems to be the case.

I’ve never sponsored anyone.. I hate the whole thing! People give to causes they believe in. End of.

I think he might get responses if he emphasises the personal story of his friend with MMD (with friend's agreement of course). Then it's not just a random 'sponsor me to do this thing I like doing' request.

Op why are you avoiding saying what he's actually doing?

Or pissed off, bored, and sick to DEATH of being asked to give give give to every bloody cause, and sponsor every person for this and that, and give to every other child's thing THEY are doing! Including the dreadful African school trips that many children go on, that they need £7000 for.

I am sick to death of being asked for money. It's also in every shop, store, eatery, every bloody bastard bloody time I go out. 'Would you like to 'round up' your £7.88 to £10,00 for 'charity?' 'Would you like to add a pound for charity?' 'Would you like to contribute an extra 5% for XYZ charity?'

No. I fucking WOULDN'T. If that makes me mean spirited, then I will wear that badge! 😎

I used to repeatedly buy raffle tickets, sponsor other people’s kids at work, but when I asked for sponsorship for my kid who was doing a sponsored walk for cancer research ( her gran had just been treated for breast cancer ) not one of those people even sponsored my child £1. I stopped sponsoring other people after that.

I would definitely sponsor a charity for MMD. It must be the worse illness a person can go through. A friend is suffering from it just now.it’s horrific. If any of your friends asks you to sponsor in the future I’d tell them no and why not.

Sorry MND

YABU

If you want to sponsor other people or people's children do fundraising activities, feel free to do so. Or not. Your money, your choice.

And other people get to make that choice for themselves as well.

Personally, I think many adults who ask for money to climb a mountain/cycle around the country/ swim the channel/ etc are just wanting others to fund their personal jollies. And families that are better off than me wanting money for their children to participate in elite sports/dance/theatre shouldn't be asking others to fund those activities, which I also see frequently. Galling.

Honestly I can’t be arsed with grown adults doing sponsored anything. They can donate money themselves if it’s important to them. But that doesn’t give them anything to show off about on SM.

Yeh you do sound incredibly tight.

Theres nothing wrong with being asked to give money to charity- no doubt we all could/ should be doing more.

Even McD has the bloody round up thing! I'm with you. It's everywhere.

Like deaths from Covid, MND is something that affects either a number of people you know or nobody, few people seem to only know one.
Those we've known who died from it had all been exceptionally fit at some point in their lives, so sponsorship may be more forthcoming from those involved with football or rugby clubs.
Good luck.

Quite honestly these are usually vanity projects for middle class people who want to do something and they disguise it as charity. Like a senior consultant with high salary taking the challenge of cycling to Paris or climbing a mountain. It is going to charity but I'd just rather donate directly and these people can run 42k their own dime and time.

That being said. If I had asked someone to donate then I'd donate back to those people.

I don't know why you're getting so wound up about it.

It's his challenge. He can find his own sponsors.

It's not up to you to get involved.

You do sound incredibly tight

Yeah, so what?

It works for me. Nothing wrong with being tight. How much money I give (or don't give) is my business. I do not need to be 'doing more.' I've done plenty in the past, (and given plenty) and I am not a mug anymore. Anyone begging money from me can jog on.

(You sound entitled and grabby by the way. Expecting people to give give give because in YOUR opinion, everyone should 'do more.') 🙄

A family member recently did a charity event. Paid the sponsorship money themselves rather than badgering people. Said didn’t want to ask friends. The charity said they were perfectly happy for participants to pay the sponsorship themselves. Really enjoyed it. In your position op, I’d send out a reminder to people you’ve previously sponsored nearer the time and if nobody sponsors him, then don’t sponsor them next time.

I genuinely didn’t think I was being that unreasonable but from the comments I didn’t realise people had such strong views on an adult doing things for charity but I’ll take it on the chin.

Sponsorship is such a minefield. I do donate sometimes if I like the person / support the cause but I don’t tend to feel obliged. I also won’t if some of the money is going towards paying for the person to do the event (with very occasional exceptions).

I’ve done one sponsored event so far in my life - a self funded marathon to raise money for a charity that directly helped a family member who died as a child. Planning another event soon, which will be a tough outdoor challenge but admittedly something that I want to do. Again, I will completely self fund (all money raised to the charity) and will be raising money for a cancer charity / hospice following the recent death of my much loved sibling to a pretty sudden and aggressive cancer in their 30s.
Even though I feel that it a pretty ‘worthy’ thing, I still think I’ll feel slightly odd asking for sponsorship and definitely won’t push it on anyone.

Actually, this might be part of it. Why isn't he asking himself?