Friends not sponsoring dh

[Primmyhill]

Ok, I know times are hard and there are loads of people asking for sponsorship etc but I’m just a bit hacked off. In the past I’ve sponsored friends kids for things like walking around the playground at lunch time, sponsored silence etc, you get my drift but there’s been loads over the last few years and I always give £10-20. My husband is doing a huge challenge in April and the sponsorship has been live for months and I’ve sent the link out twice and not one of them has sponsored him. None of them are badly off - they just can’t be bothered I reckon and I’m pretty annoyed. AIBU? Would you do? I’ll know better next time when darling Henry wants money for pushing his teddy around the local f’ing playing field.

My dc did a sponsored event when he was 17. Lots of people said they’d sponsored him, few actually did.

i would only sponsor the person if I believed in the cause, and/or knew the person.

You say it’s a huge challenge - what is it? Running London marathon? Climbing Mount Everest?

I think sponsoring a child is very different to an adult.

Tight? Yeah, right. Give quite a lot to charity. There was a charity that helped me when I had cancer. So I did a couple of extra shifts, and gave them what I earned. Way more than I'd have got by sponsorship, and not asking other people to pay for me to have fun.

Of course YABU. If I sponsored every random adult charity event it would bloody thousands!

For me it would depend what's he's doing and for what cause. I've run multiple half marathons myself so wouldn't ask for sponsorship anymore (some of them are for charity but I just donate a wedge myself now if it's a race I want to run). Wouldn't stop me sponsoring a friend running their first one for a cause that's important to them or me though. A friend who is very much not a runner if doing a marathon for a dementia charity this year as his Mum was recently diagnosed, happy to put £20 his way.

Some of my friends have done amazing challenges that I wouldn't put myself through in a million years, always happy to sponsor them if they're doing it for charity.

YANBU to stop sponsoring their kids in return though!

You don't give to receive

Just to add when I ran for charity, I was a new runner; raised money for a local charity (got sponsored by people I didn't really know) and did a car boot sale (my stuff and friends). It was a few years ago though and I think people generally had more money then.

Also being on SM helps (I'm not now but was at the time) as it reminds people, I think a text/email can feel like you are "demanding" not asking (this isn't the case for you).

You live and learn and I feel the same - I certainly won’t be doing it again in the future.

Three colleagues currently rowing the Atlantic, 'for charity'. They need 290k before anything goes to charity. It's
A no from me.

I think that if you had have said what it was for in your OP, the vote would've been better. Unfortunately there are so many around that want to raise money for their kid to go abroad and 'help build wells' and such, and we know that it's just an excuse for a piss up and a free holiday. You didn't say in your OP what it was for (hence I think the huge 'yabu' vote) you said later but as we know, a majority of people only read the OP and no further - so I'm wondering if your friends/acquaintances just think it's another grifter-type thing.

Did you tell them what it's for?

I sponsor plenty of adults, it’s not that weird. I have over 100 people in my team so if they send a link, I sponsor them (out of obligation). That said when I raised money relating to a health issue I have, I was so touched to raise over £1000 from generous friends and family. So yes, even if it’s people’s kids, they should repay the sponsorship.

That's a lovely thing for your DH to do - I hope it goes well. Hard as it is, try not to take it personally. Different people will make different choices about supporting charities and sponsoring people. Everyone's entitled to their own approach, as it's voluntary. MND has been in the media a bit more recently, so maybe your DH could look at building on that momentum by approaching places like local rugby clubs and seeing if they'd like to sponsor him.

YABVVVVVU

Adults asking for sponsorship money just reminds me of this Catherine Tate sketch.

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Nar I wouldn’t be sponsoring either. Sorry op .

I do give to charities, but I’m very picky about which ones, especially if the have big bosses making more then the prime minister!

I like to sponsor people from time to time but I tend to only do it when
a) the charity is a cause close to my heart (MND absolutely ticks that box for me)
And
b) they are doing something genuinely impressive and have made it clear they are covering any "running costs" themselves. I'm not paying for someone to have a fun day out /trip to India or whatever under the fake umbrella of charity

Also - if you aren't on social media, how are you sharing the link? If it's by email maybe it's going into people's junk mail?

So over sponsoring people.

Especially to do things they wanted to do anyway. Fair enough for you to stop sponsoring other people.

Not so much to expect people to sponsor you and your family in turn.

Yes that's the kind of thing that really annoys me, it's not really for charity at all!

I dont look down on adults doing things for charity...fair play to them if they want to do something for charity and give their own money

I just think that very often, things that people ask to be sponsored for are either something they personally benefit from and want to do so is quite self indulgent, or the event they are doing costs money that needs to be covered so the charity does not see all of the money.

Yes, that is taking the piss.
They would be better off raising that money and sending it to the charity.

Yeah, so what?
it works for me… nothing wrong with being tight… it’s my business

You were the one who opened this dialogue with me.

well, for what it’s worth, in my opinion there’s a lot wrong with being both selfish and tight. I prefer people who are generous and think about what works for others and well as what works for themselves.
Not sure how that makes me the entitled , grabby one out of the two of us, but ok 😂

I don’t need someone else to tell me who I should donate money to. I have standing orders with the charities that I care about. I’m not giving extra money to another charity to justify your husbands hobby.

I can’t believe how many people on here are saying they hate sponsored things.
What? Someone getting off their arse and doing something to raise money (in most cases) for charity? Trying to make a positive difference in the world.
How can you hate that? I don’t get it

What? WHY? Why do they need nearly a third of a million?!

I think this is the most articulate way of explaining it. The fact the OP still hasn't said what her husband is actually doing highlights the fact it's probably something similar.