For being rude to an old lady

[ThePerkyCoralPoet]

Doing my food shop at m&s, I was rushing to pick someone up after. I needed some jam. Lady was in the way. I said “excuse me sorry can I just grab that” she just stood there so I proceeded to reach for the jam.

She gave me the most disgusting look I have ever recieved.

So because today has been a long day I said “ I did actually say excuse me and I did actually ask you to move out of the way” to which she responded “it’s such a me first attitude” I said “you do realise you’re in a supermarket. And you don’t own the supermarket. We all have places to be and people to see darling” and I walked off.

am I missing something here. Have I not used correct supermarket etiquette

Tbh you were a bit unreasonable. M&S food Hall is always full of older people standing in the way and sometimes you just have to wait a minute. If it was her trolley in the way rather than a person then quite reasonable to reach over.

I do but sometimes I like to squeeze the fruit etc.

I've not read all the replies, but tbh I've occaisonally reached in and quickly grabbed what I needed when someone was clearly taking longer to deliberate what they wanted. I made sure there was plenty of space. I remember once a mother and child were in the cereal aisle, and they kept hovering near the one I want (typical 🙄) but I was patient and waited a few minutes whilst they deliberated. Then my patience went down and I thought I'll just let them know I want that cereal.

She was choosing her jam and you wanted her to move so you could pick a jam instead of her.

I hope she's not going home to an empty house with that jam. You sound mean.

Sounds like you were rude and unnecessary

Maybe you’d be better suited to Morrisons? I’m not sure calling someone ‘darling’ would go down well anywhere, unless you’re a elderly male selling your wares at Romford market?

Maybe this request would have been better prefaced by 'excuse me, but could I please just take this item from the shelf, thanks' with a smile. I have to do this sometimes on a busy Saturday, and the request is usually met with 'yes of course, no problem'.
Manners cost nothing 😎

Could you not have said, "excuse me, could I just get that cereal?"
We've all been in that situation, I don't know why people get stressed and angry over such a small thing. It's not good.
.

The etiquette is you wait for that person to finish their perusal. You can't be rude just because you were in a rush. It used to piss me off getting stuck behind all the slowly moving elderly people in M&S when I was trying to get a sandwich on my lunch hour, but I would wait politely. Shopping is often a bit of a social event for elderly people, cut them some slack.

Yes you ARE the problem.

Not once did it enter into your skull that she might've been hard of hearing/needed time to process what you said.

And now you're throwing a tantrum because of a 'look' she gave you.

Embarrassing.

I’m absolutely see the relevance of age. I have seen so many elderly women-& it is mainly women, behave like this. They act like the world owes them, bitter and unkind. Work in a shop or hospitality and you’ll soon see it.
I was embarrassed to take my mil shopping she was so rude & behaved appallingly.

So you had a 30-second non-threatening tiny conflict in the supermarket. Why is it still on your mind, to the point you start a thread about it? You feel the need to argue why you were justified to behave as you did... because you kind of know that you weren't.

Of course being rude was unreasonable. And unnecessary.

I've never understood why people who have so little time left to live, live it at such slow speed.

Carried on what?

I'd have found it slightly annoying, but I'd be glad you said "excuse me" and
Would have just allowed access.
It's the ones who just say "sorry" as the reach over me that give me the rage.
Well not the rage, just a bit of a pisser.

I'm on your side OP I'll be nice first but dirty looks or people being cheeky and I will give that attitude straight back. I'm actually shocked the amount of people who think it's normal to waste other peoples time and who would just stand there and wait.

I cant stand supermarkets cause it's full of people who have far too much free time acting as if it's a day trip out. I'm there (only when I have to be) to get what I need and get out. Pick what you want off a shelf and move on and dont block the whole shelf with a trolley etc

Shes probably the type that expects a queue or people to stand behind her whilst she fingers through every item.... screw that.

Really?!

The other thing about older people
Is that they can look angry without even being angry. Wrinkles do that.

And I speak as someone with an untweaked face who is looking more and more like her dear mum every day!

Doesn’t matter if he spoke or not, it’s rude and a no no. I’ve had this a few times in various situations. The problem in supermarkets is that being low down in a chair, even pushing a trolley, you’re out of people’s eye line, and they’re usually not paying much attention because they’re focused on shopping. I’ve had people bash into me, trip over the chair, and a couple of times people who are concentrating on the shelves have stepped back straight into me and then looked at me like it’s my fault !!

My chair was moved in a restaurant once - in the middle of the meal !! Someone pushing past me, and when he realised I wasn’t in a dining chair but a wheelchair he just yanked me away from the table to the side. Had I been taking a drink of anything at the time it would have been all over me. I’ve now perfected the art of slamming on the brake if anyone attempts to move the chair, and then explaining to them how it’s not only rude but can be considered common assault - you wouldn’t pick up a stranger and bodily move them out of the way, so why do people think it’s OK to move a wheelchair out of the way when it’s an extension of the person sitting in it !!

Yes but even though everyone who works in retail, healthcare, hospitality knows it, you cant say it.

Elderly people but women in particularly do seem so aggressive and bitter at times as if the world owes them something. I couldn't care what age you are, move out of my way and let me get my shopping.

Jeez you sound delightful too

You will one day - and I hope you’re ashamed when you get there.

Carried on being old, I suspect.