To think nurseries seem depressing? Please help me narrow down

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Posting for traffic and help regarding nurseries.

I’ve viewed 8 now and I don’t feel comfortable really leaving my child in any of them. They all seem a bit depressing! However, given I want my child to interact with other children I’ll overlook my concerns as this is my priority. I will also need it likely only 2-3 days a week.

This first nursery has a lot going for it. It has an "Outstanding" Ofsted rating and is owned by an ex-headteacher. It celebrates different cultural events, which is important to me, with events like Chinese New Year and Ramadan. They also have parent Saturdays and family days, which is a nice touch. I haven't seen this level of inclusivity at other nurseries and my child being mixed race in an overwhelming white area, these inclusions even if only on a small level, are somewhat important to me. They seem to offer a tailored childcare approach with twice-daily outdoor time and onsite cook and encourage light risk play which I think is important.

However, I do have a couple of concerns. Firstly, there's no dedicated sleep area, and I saw a child sleeping on their front. This worries me a bit, although the child did seem older (over 1 years old), unlike another nursery I viewed which had a supervised child at 8 months on their front which immediately put me off (I don’t know if I’m being silly!) Secondly, the nursery felt a bit cold and clinical.

The second nursery has a "Good" Ofsted rating. The children seemed happy and there was a generally good vibe. However, there was a smell at the entrance, mold in the baby room, a staff member I wasn't sure about (he appeared quite dopey and all of the staff seemed very young and inexperienced), and an overflowing skip outside. The Ofsted report also mentioned they need to improve consistency of support and encourage independence.

The third nursery has a bright and airy environment, focuses on learning, and has an onsite cook. It seems like there would be lots of interaction for older children and it did seem lively for older children. It had the most inviting and clean atmosphere and the staff seemed switched on and mature. However, there's a long waitlist which is also a good sign I guess - my child would be 1.5 years old before being able to go which is longer than I hoped, and the location is slightly more inconvenient. They haven’t had an Ofsted visit since 2019.

Which nursery would you choose and why?

Have you had any experiences with nurseries like these that you can share?

Any advice appreciated.

I'd choose a child minder instead if you aren't liking the look of the nurseries.
It's a more "at home" setting.

Childminder until number 3 available x

Either 1 or 3. Ask about the sleeping arrangements at nursery 1, they can't possibly just have them all randomly sleeping all over the place surely?

Nurseries do vary a lot! I saw some awful ones before I found the lovely one ds went to.

Get on the waiting list at no 3, keep in touch with them, and also look for an alternative (childminder), just in case you need one initially. Waiting lists can sometimes dissolve quite quickly, so don't despair.

Sounds like you need to keep looking in my opinion. When a place feels right you will know the feeling.
im not sure what age your child is but if a nursery takes over 2 yesr olds (maybe this is what you looked at?) I don’t think it’s common for nurseries to have dedicated nap areas, of course they will make one up if a child needs it. I thought this too but when it came to it my child wouldnt nap there any ways, but saying this it wasn’t long days there. For babies obviously this doesn’t apply and they should areas for this.
i wouldn’t pay too much attention to ofsted report, yes it is important but I think your natural instinct is more important. After all you need to leave your child there so you need to be happy too.
Hope this helps.

Waiting list for 3, but 1 in the meantime - and you might like it and just stay. Fine for older kids to be on front. Fine to not have sleep area as they'll have quiet time for nap time.

I find it hard to believe the primary reason you're looking at nurseries for your child is so that they can spend time with other kids

Any why is looking at different cultural celebrations such a priority?

Choose a childminder. Nurseries are depressing for children under 3

At our nursery the children slept on mats they laid out on the floor. I was worried how it would work but it really helped get my kids used to sleeping anywhere. I wouldn't let that put you off option 1 but no one online can make a better judgement than your gut instinct.

Either 1 or 3. The sleep situation isn’t a problem to me at all. Childminder likely to be even less likely to get a private sleep area. The baby might even be on a school run during sleep time. If you have a toddler, you wont be at home with a cot for a lot of the sleep. When DC2 was a baby, she just fit around DC1’s clubs. I was often at dance or gymnastics. You are being very PFB about it.

This one.

Not all! Ours was lovely, small, homely, friendly, warm and welcoming. The staff were fabulous and over the 5/6yrs we had a child there we never had a single issue.

All childminders I have used have a private sleeping area (a cot in a bedroom for example.) none of mine have gone on school runs as babies and toddlers, some childminders don’t take children over 4.

OFSTED insist all settings "celebrate" different cultural holidays etc, so they should all be doing that ( or at least paying lip service to it when inspected)
but I'd go with a childminder ( biased!)

Children really don't need to socialise in a group with lots of children until they are older. Maybe look at a childminder. I work in a preschool and you can often tell the kids who have been to nursery from a really young age. They are much better at fighting for what they want and to be heard and to get attention from the adults and not necessarily in a good way......

Agree. Kids don't need nursery to socialise. If you need to work or need a break then totally understandable.

I'd be going for a childminder. I'd look for one that comes recommended if possible.

You feel uncomfortable for a reason.

When looking at nurseries try to chat to the staff and see how long they've worked there. Try to figure out if there is a high staff turnover

I agree here. I actually didn’t send my children to a nursery until they were well over 2 and even then it was very minimal, I carried on childminders. I never found a nursery that I felt could look after my babies needs, some felt like it was children looking after children. Childminders have much better homely feel in my opinion and are more bespoke to your child’s needs than a nursery. I don’t think children under 2 need to worry about socialising with other kids as they don’t learn these skills until over 2 anyways as they are independent learners initially.

The first one sounds great. I’m not sure most nurseries have a dedicated sleeping area except for babies. Ours just whipped the mats out on the floor for naps. In the summer, they’d do the same in the garden underneath the big shady oak tree. So much better than just shoving them in a room. The only nursery we saw with a separate sleeping room was draconian. Windowless dark room and they were put in there at dedicated nap times and checked every 20 minutes. No thanks! Very happy for mine to sleep on a mat with a staff member in the room falling asleep to a story.

Most children sleep on their fronts. From 1, certainly totally fine. Mine were at home from probably 8 months. It all sounds great and I too would want that level of inclusivity.

I can understand why OFSTED need to see this. I just don't understand why it would be a personal priority as a parent

Older babies/young toddlers will put themselves down to sleep however they’re comfortable and that may mean their tummy. It’s a complete non issue. Nap time on floor mats in the classroom is also completely normal when it’s a room for young toddlers over 12 months because at that age they will be on a group schedule and all nap together after lunch. Interacting with other children should not be your priority either, unless your child is 2.5 or older, because younger children just don’t really do this. When you send an under 2 to nursery it’s purely childcare, not a social development opportunity. But of course you want to make sure it’s the best possible childcare you can find and that DC will be happy there!

From what you’ve said above I’d probably waitlist for option 3 but if it doesn’t come through I’d also be perfectly happy with option 1.

I agree, although I find it a bit of a nonsense for childminders to do it TBH.
Top tip, never tell the inspector you don't acknowledge any religious stuff. You won't get outstanding!!

I preferred a nursery over a childminder and figured of they are good enough for other people's children why would my child be any different

Ah. Yes. Depressing nurseries.
We had this 12 years ago.
In the end we found a childminder. I just could not get my head around my child being in a nursery.

He started nursery at 2yo. As did our 2nd child.

Worked for us anyway.

Are their childminders where you are?
Or how about nanny shares with a space?

I have a nanny share and a childminder - nurseries depressed me too. No child should have institutional care imo, should be in a home setting!