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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People who are too busy to do exercise

616 replies

Hollyandivygoout · 27/02/2025 09:43

I run about 4 miles, 4 times a week. I’m in a routine and force myself to do it even when I can’t be arsed. It takes me about 30-40 minutes each time I go for a run and I squeeze it in early morning, before dinner, just whenever I can really. I work full time and have 2DC who are admittedly at secondary school now, but this is something I’ve always done.
My AIBU is finding it annoying when people tell me they don’t have time to do any exercise. It’s like they’re so busy and important and I’ve got all the time in the world. I honestly don’t believe that the vast majority of people can’t squeeze in half an hour a few times a week.

OP posts:
nousername365 · 27/02/2025 13:39

Having read through the comments it's just even more obvious that people will make multiple excuses on why they can't exercise for 30 mins per day but can easily scroll social media for 4 plus hours per day.

I work 30-40 hours week (condensed into 4 days as I work 10 hour nightshifts as a nurse)

I have 4DC who are 6,5,2,2, oldest 2 in school and younger 2 in nursery.

I do all drop offs and 2-4 pick ups per week. DH is very helpful but I still do all the cooking and food shopping.

On a weekly basis on average I do 2-3 x 5km runs, 1-2 x 1.5km swims and 1 x PT session which I would love to increase but can't as it's too expensive.

I prioritise exercise because it's amazing for my mental health.

I should also add that DH & I have ZERO family support yet still manage this because it's important to us.

If it's important to you then you will do it; but people will always make excuses.

bottleofvodka · 27/02/2025 13:43

I have a demanding job, I work full time, I'm parenting alone and have a 9 year old child with additional needs and a 4 year old waiting to be assessed. I absolutely try (occasionally a 30.min walk on my lunch break) but most of the time my lunch break is spent shopping or general family admin. Life is tough. Sometimes I get.out for a walk at weekends, Sometimes I get away for a hike but not always. It's very tough.

DeffoNeedANameChange · 27/02/2025 13:43

In order to squeeze it in, I would have to drop something that I want to do more.

I wonder, do you find time to keep up to date with modern literature, or Art? Do you dedicate half an hour every a day to listening to in-depth podcasts about global politics? Do you play an instrument, or sing in a choir? Are you working towards a Master's degree? Do you have a side-hustle small business that you're working to get off the ground. I'd find it really annoying if you said you couldn't do any/all those things because you were so busy running round in a great big circle.

pizzaHeart · 27/02/2025 13:44

Well it’s not like we all are doing the same certain amount of things and then have certain amount of free time to use up during which I choose watching TV while you are doing running. It’s not so simple.
People have different things in their life, different opportunities and different starts.

I absolutely agree with
@MrsTerryPratchett ,
your post OP doesn’t come across well at all.

Doingmybestbut · 27/02/2025 13:46

DeffoNeedANameChange · 27/02/2025 13:43

In order to squeeze it in, I would have to drop something that I want to do more.

I wonder, do you find time to keep up to date with modern literature, or Art? Do you dedicate half an hour every a day to listening to in-depth podcasts about global politics? Do you play an instrument, or sing in a choir? Are you working towards a Master's degree? Do you have a side-hustle small business that you're working to get off the ground. I'd find it really annoying if you said you couldn't do any/all those things because you were so busy running round in a great big circle.

Do you dedicate half an hour every a day to listening to in-depth podcasts about global politics?

To be fair, you could do this while running. You could also keep up with modern literature if you like audiobooks. I like a bit of In Our Time when I’m on the cross trainer.

housethatbuiltme · 27/02/2025 13:47

I have all the time in the world usually, time is one thing I rarely ever lack. I don't have energy, co-ordination or health though. Good for you running 4 miles but even without my other disabilities, my uncontrollable cardio induced asthma would literally kill me if I went running (something that kills 4000 people per year).

I shouldn't HAVE to justify 'why' to nosy idiots that think they are just magically better than me rather than just 'more privileged' though.

You might make time to jog but your life you described is bog standard at best, you are not representative of everyone timetable. Example: maybe they work full time and have 2 kids just like you but they also deal as a single parent with a child with autism and severe ODD who can't be left unsupervised and/or a parent with dementia that can't be left alone because they wander off, fall, turn on ovens etc... and 'time to jog' just isn't important to them when they can't even find time to pee usually.

Many people don't have time to sit, eat and enjoy a lunch break, I have a pretty low energy life and just had to throw away my dinner after two bites because the kids are off school this week and I didn't get a chance to eat it before breaking up a sibling fight and fixing an injury. I couldn't take 40 minute to run even if I physically could because what am I going to do with my kids? just abandon the toddler in front of Mr. tumble during that time? The idea that everyone just has 40 minute lunch breaks with nothing else on to take off on a run is insane.

Freshstartyear25 · 27/02/2025 13:47

I don’t have time to exercise, I used to tell myself this, I have a full life with working full time, 3 children and the middle one has SEN so life was such a balancing act. However at the beginning of last year, I also realised that I hate how I look in clothes, I was obese, not finding fun in anything then I decided to prioritise me as well. So DH help me set everything up in the garage and now I wake up at 5:30am in the week before the kids wake up to work out. I’ve now lost weight and feel so much better now. Now exercising is something I love to do as I don’t want to go back to that rot.
It was hard waking up that early to start with but with time, I’m used to it now.
However, I can never look at someone in the face and tell them what you’ve just said. It’s so smug, people are facing lots of things.

DeffoNeedANameChange · 27/02/2025 13:49

Doingmybestbut · 27/02/2025 13:46

Do you dedicate half an hour every a day to listening to in-depth podcasts about global politics?

To be fair, you could do this while running. You could also keep up with modern literature if you like audiobooks. I like a bit of In Our Time when I’m on the cross trainer.

Show quote history

Well there you go then - absolutely no excuse! Now I'll be super annoyed if it turns out she can't be bothered to work her way theough the booker prize short list on audio book just because "she's too busy running".

CoffeeGood · 27/02/2025 13:53

Nottsandcrosses · 27/02/2025 11:10

Really fair point.

When my husband is away i switch my sessions to nights, my 5 year old comes with me, my other 2 can either be left in the house or are at training themselves.

For example im taking my older 2 to run club with me as they are active and run, on Saturday my 5 year old will come to a conditioning session with me with a pack lunch and her ipad.

My steps however dramatically drop as i cant get out my walks and if i do the 5 year old slows me down and whines so generally i dont get doing that if husband is away.

I honest to god get it, its hard, really hard, there are ways around it but again trying to put these in place is also hard, affordability can also be a factor.

If you really want to do it there is always ways.

Show quote history

Which gym do you go to? Where I live there are no gyms that allow children in to sit and watch a class?

You also admit that if your husband isn't facilitating your exercise you can't do anywhere nearly as much. So.... what are your "ways around it" and "there is always way" hints to the single parents who NEVER have a husband to enable their exercise, (or other family who can step in, there are often threads on here with single mum's unable to do something, even a one-off thing as they have literally noone to help), also don't have a gym where they can take their child and their child whines if they try to take them out for a decent walk?

MrsSun271024 · 27/02/2025 13:55

You're right. I'm just lazy

  • Female, 31, 7 months PP, still exclusivly breasfeeding, work full time.
Shame on me.
Heidi2018 · 27/02/2025 13:55

Oh jog on OP, literally.... People prioritise their time differently to you, big deal. For me and my family and life setup, doing exercise either means getting up earlier (but I prioritise sleep more) or else going late at night (but I prioritise down time more). I don't have 30-40 minutes in the middle of the day to do it, that's just the facts.

Mielikki · 27/02/2025 13:56

arcticpandas · 27/02/2025 13:20

Seriously?: "You’ve chosen to live a life that is not compatible with doing a lot of sport/exercise (or any other time-consuming hobby)."

She's describing a life working ft and having small children, very common and not something alien. Children do grow up quickly you know and can then be left home while mum is going out to the gym/a hobby.

Show quote history

Still a choice, and one that leaves you very time short/tired and with little motivation or time for other interests.

Plenty of people choose otherwise: no or only one child, less demanding job with shorter hours, partner that pulls their weight, de-prioritise things like housework.

housethatbuiltme · 27/02/2025 13:56

nousername365 · 27/02/2025 13:39

Having read through the comments it's just even more obvious that people will make multiple excuses on why they can't exercise for 30 mins per day but can easily scroll social media for 4 plus hours per day.

I work 30-40 hours week (condensed into 4 days as I work 10 hour nightshifts as a nurse)

I have 4DC who are 6,5,2,2, oldest 2 in school and younger 2 in nursery.

I do all drop offs and 2-4 pick ups per week. DH is very helpful but I still do all the cooking and food shopping.

On a weekly basis on average I do 2-3 x 5km runs, 1-2 x 1.5km swims and 1 x PT session which I would love to increase but can't as it's too expensive.

I prioritise exercise because it's amazing for my mental health.

I should also add that DH & I have ZERO family support yet still manage this because it's important to us.

If it's important to you then you will do it; but people will always make excuses.

So you have a DH, childcare and don't have additional caring responsibilities for family? So quite a cosy simple and well supported life, you kind of posted the definition of a privileged family life.

I can't honestly be that hard to understand others don't all have the same comfortable well balanced life with no major disabilities, care responsibilities and the support of an equal partner.

lifeonmars100 · 27/02/2025 13:57

Blondebrownorred · 27/02/2025 10:42

Could she run in her lunch hour? That's what I do

Show quote history

Quite unusual to get a whole hour in most jobs these days. I used to get 30 mins when I worked for the NHS and often had to skip this due to the demands of the job.

CharlieRight · 27/02/2025 13:58

I went to visit a supplier in Tianjin last week, two nights away in a nice hotel. It was great! I had an hour in the gym each evening and swam a mile each morning. It just goes to show how having kids and spouses takes up so much time.

at home I never have time to spend exercising in the evening bar 10 minutes stretching before bed. I have to walk to work instead and swim or gym in my lunch hour.

Thornybush · 27/02/2025 14:00

There are so many defensive posters here. OP has made very good point. A lot of people just don't prioritise exercise for whatever reasons . Exercise (not just running) is very important for your health and lack of exercise (along with overeating, alcoholism and smoking ) is one of the main reasons that our health service is on its knees. People need to take responsibility for their own health and stop dismissing those who do prioritise their well being. I am not keen on it myself but I do it anyway because I realise the importance of it.

CharlieRight · 27/02/2025 14:02

lifeonmars100 · 27/02/2025 13:57

Quite unusual to get a whole hour in most jobs these days. I used to get 30 mins when I worked for the NHS and often had to skip this due to the demands of the job.

Show quote history

I used to get 2 hours in the summer, but the afternoon was extended to 6pm.

Now we get 90 minutes it’s perfect for some exercise

zeibesaffron · 27/02/2025 14:04

Sometimes I have time and sometimes I want to sit on the sofa with cheese and wine!! Stop being so judgmental and get on with what you do!

dottydodah · 27/02/2025 14:04

Well I am in recovery from Cancer Treatment ATM .Bloody shattering I can tell you! DH is in his 60s still plays Football 5 a side every week.Does not ask other people why they are not doing similar. As my old friend said upon Retiring when everyone asked her what she was going to do .Replied Nothing at all,and Im not starting that until Lunchtime!

JimmyHillsChin · 27/02/2025 14:06

OP your post has really pissed me off! Lucky you to get to exercise when you want.

I used to do loads of exercise before having kids and now I’m not able to do any. My eldest is in year 2 at school and my youngest is 3 and doesn’t go to nursery. When/how exactly shall I exercise? Strap my three year old on my back and go for a run??

I’ll take up my hobbies once my little one starts school but until then, yeah I don’t have time. I certainly don’t put it down to being more important than anyone else

BlackEyedFrozenPeas · 27/02/2025 14:06

Some people just don't like exercise. Others prioritise other things. Who are we to judge?

Me, I love exercise and this week I have exercised every day for at least 1 hour. I do it at the expense of other things. It's my hobby. I don't spend much time on my hair, makeup or clothes as I don't have any spare time to do this. I'm not into any other hobby whereas someone else may be.

I've got lots of other things to do that are important but they can wait till I get back from my class/ run/ gym.

Brownie258 · 27/02/2025 14:07

The OP did only mention people who say they don’t have time btw.

Nottsandcrosses · 27/02/2025 14:08

CoffeeGood · 27/02/2025 13:53

Which gym do you go to? Where I live there are no gyms that allow children in to sit and watch a class?

You also admit that if your husband isn't facilitating your exercise you can't do anywhere nearly as much. So.... what are your "ways around it" and "there is always way" hints to the single parents who NEVER have a husband to enable their exercise, (or other family who can step in, there are often threads on here with single mum's unable to do something, even a one-off thing as they have literally noone to help), also don't have a gym where they can take their child and their child whines if they try to take them out for a decent walk?

Show quote history

I go to small group PT, so not a classic gym. there is a max of 16 people in a session.

No i didnt say that, i said my steps reduce so more often than not i wont hit my 8-10k a day when my husband is away, i still do my sessions.

My best friend is a single parent to 3 children, she trains and has a walking pad at home that slides under the couch, she pulls it out and does her steps if shes at home with the kids.

Listen i never said its easy, but when you really want to do something you will find a way!

If you really dont want to do it then THATS ALSO FINE, as tis was me up until a year ago.

Mightymoog · 27/02/2025 14:13

I CBA to exercise.
does that offend you?

willitevergetwarm · 27/02/2025 14:23

I am out of the house at 7am Monday to Friday, home at 6.15pm at the earliest. I'm usually starving when I get home and by the time dinner is all done and dusted it's half 7 (we cook from scratch every night). I'm menopausal, anaemic and exhausted and I just cannot be a**ed to go out for a run, especially in the dark. I am aware it's getting lighter in the evenings but it won't change how exhausted I am.

Weekends are full of washing, cleaning, shopping, grandchildren, winding down etc

Gold star to you though for gloating that you can be bothered and can find the time

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