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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People who are too busy to do exercise

616 replies

Hollyandivygoout · 27/02/2025 09:43

I run about 4 miles, 4 times a week. I’m in a routine and force myself to do it even when I can’t be arsed. It takes me about 30-40 minutes each time I go for a run and I squeeze it in early morning, before dinner, just whenever I can really. I work full time and have 2DC who are admittedly at secondary school now, but this is something I’ve always done.
My AIBU is finding it annoying when people tell me they don’t have time to do any exercise. It’s like they’re so busy and important and I’ve got all the time in the world. I honestly don’t believe that the vast majority of people can’t squeeze in half an hour a few times a week.

OP posts:
gollyimholly · 27/02/2025 09:55

I've been trying to get DH to carve out some time to exercise and his excuse is he has no time. I have said initially to just try a 10-15min beginners exercise video on YouTube.

DH gets home from work around 9/10pm and says he's too tired. And doesn't want to be "wired" before bed. I've suggested he could at least do it on the weekends and his two WFH days where he would definitely be home at least. He has a.gym in his office building at work so I've suggested he could go right after work before he gets home.

I think the problem is his willingness. I have had periods of my life where I haven't exercised and once I fall out of habit (which I don't feel good about) I find it really hard to motivate myself to get back into it.

Magnastorm · 27/02/2025 09:56

Some people just don't fucking want to go for a 4 mile run 4 times a week.

So what?

Comedycook · 27/02/2025 09:57

You could apply this logic to anything in life...

Time to read
Time to bake your own bread
Time to style your hair
Time to do your make up
Time to volunteer

All these things could be substituted for the word exercise

KvotheTheBloodless · 27/02/2025 09:57

I run about 50k a week. I am very privileged to have the time, money and motivation to do this - it's an absolute luxury.

Many, many people don't enjoy running, or don't live in an area where it is safe or pleasant to run. Running alone in the dark is scary. If you have young children, how can you just leave them home alone? It is surprisingly expensive (trainers, clothing, frequent laundry/showering). Many people literally can't run (injuries/disabilities), and lack indoor space to do indoor workouts.

Run a mile in someone else's shoes and stop being such an insensitive berk.

Lucoad · 27/02/2025 09:57

Some people just don’t have time it’s not a slight against you or some stealth boast, often just family circumstances in various forms. Dh was the ultimate gym goer, then I had cancer last year, he was the only one working, doing all the chores, taking me to every appt etc he had no free time to do proper exercise or go for a runs

Comedycook · 27/02/2025 09:57

Magnastorm · 27/02/2025 09:56

Some people just don't fucking want to go for a 4 mile run 4 times a week.

So what?

Quite....it would be my idea of hell

IamnotSethRogan · 27/02/2025 09:58

Tbh I can see what OP means. It's not just in regards to exercise though. I have some people I know who are competitively busy and they'll ask what I got up too at the weekend. I've got a few interests/sports i make time for and very much get the "oooh I'd love to be able to do that but I just don't have time". We're really in similar positions with work/kids but they justify not making time for themselves and honestly they seem so stressed. They're not having any fun. I think it's a real flaw with our society because all their husbands seem to have time to do whatever they like.

**Edited to add people are also just maybe brushing off the not running four times a week thing as being busy because they just don't won't to run

Wallywobbles · 27/02/2025 09:59

Awesome for you. I have 4 kids, we all did an hour commute. Out at 6:50 back at 7. Supper and farm chores still to do.

It's only since 3 out of 4 of them have left home that I've been able to take care of myself better.

AnneLovesGilbert · 27/02/2025 09:59

You couldn’t pay me to run unless there was a fire behind me.

clarrylove · 27/02/2025 10:00

Not everyone feels comfortable running alone in the dark or has safe routes to do so. Perhaps they mean they don't have time in the day.

Poppins21 · 27/02/2025 10:01

You seem to take other people not exercising quite personally. I go to the bouldering wall 3 times a week and do yoga to keep fit. I can’t say I even have much conversation about other people exercise routine but I can see how it might not be appealing to people if they feel rushed and or tired. And some people just hate exercise. It has no effect on me.

EilonwyWithRedGoldHair · 27/02/2025 10:03

Comedycook · 27/02/2025 09:46

I don't think it's because they literally don't have any time free at all...I think it is because they are too exhausted to use that time

This is part of it for me. The other part is generally my 'leisure time' is after my autistic DS is asleep, which is often after 11pm. I'm not going running at 11pm, at that point I just want to sit down and spend time with DH.

Imbusytodaysorry · 27/02/2025 10:03

@Hollyandivygoout single parent are you ?

Who watched your kids when you were running before they were at high school!
Did they run with you?

iamnotalemon · 27/02/2025 10:03

Do you want a medal?

cadburyegg · 27/02/2025 10:05

I used to run 3x a week.

I don't do any exercise at the moment because I work nearly full time and I'm a single parent to 2 primary age children. Apart from every other weekend when they are with their dad, I'm either working or looking after my children. I cannot squeeze in 3 runs over one weekend.

Hope that helps 🙄

Thornybush · 27/02/2025 10:07

I have young dc and work full time. My dh works around me so I found it difficult to exercise without bringing them with me. Instead I bought a walking pad which gives me great flexibility. When kids are young it's difficult. For those without dependants it's definitely not an excuse. You always have time, get up earlier or do it in the evenings. I think people just don't want to prioritise it because they don't enjoy it which is fair enough. But it's so important for your health.

Outchy · 27/02/2025 10:07

It's doesn't take a huge stretch of imagination, that not everyone has this luxury. What exactly is it that you don't understand? Some people have young children and no support network. People who care - many 24/7 without respite and cannot leave the person alone. Some people genuinely just don't have the time. But wow on you! Congrats for being better than the rest of us.

0hHellNo · 27/02/2025 10:08

Of course some people are too busy to exercise. If you've got 2 or 3 DC, are caring for elderly parents, running a home and working a full time job you've barely got time to scratch your arse let alone got out for a half hour run three or four times a week. And if you do get ten minutes to yourself you're too knackered to even think about exercise.

Hope this helps OP.

localhere · 27/02/2025 10:08

I just hate running. I hate getting sweaty and I mostly hate that my valuable snippets of free time being used for something other than my own creativity so I say I don't have the time to do it. I do however have time' to write or paint or play the piano.

Brighteningwinter · 27/02/2025 10:09

Not everyone is you.

Some people have fewer hours in the day as they just need more sleep. The human variance is 6-10 hours, and you don't get to pick whether you need 6 or 10. Some one who needs only 6 has FOUR more hours in every day than someone who needs six. That's a fuck tonne more of life to fill each day.

Some people have health conditions that take up an hour or hours of their day to manage.

Some people have longer commutes.

Some people are just higher energy people than others. If you are higher energy, you get more done.

Some people have found an activity they love and are prepared to prioritise it. Some people have not found an activity they love - forcing yourself to do an activity you don't like requires more discipline than most of us have.

Some people live in attractive areas they feel safe to run in. Some people don't feel safe running where they live.

Some people live in areas with lots of activities and groups to choose from to be active in. Some people live in areas where they have little or nothing to choose from.

Some people have the spare money to spend on classes or exercise clothes and trainers or equipment, some people don't.

Some people have been brought up in active lives and enjoy moving and being active. Some have been brought up in quite sedentary lives and do not really enjoy being active.

I could go on. The fact is we are all different and we all have different barriers and opportunities. Other people are not you, living your life.

If you want to be active then you do need to find what are the opportunities in your life and stick to them. But we are not all starting in the same place and its is much easier for some then others.

brunettemic · 27/02/2025 10:10

You sound like a pretty lazy runner to me. 4 miles isn’t far for a regular runner, especially at that pace.

Not so nice when someone is judging you is it…?

ThirdStorm · 27/02/2025 10:11

I'm lazy that's my trouble. I get home and I'd rather rest on the sofa after a long day at work rather than go out for a run (that I know I'd enjoy). I am trying to make a change but haven't yet! Lighter evenings might help me get back into a routine.

ASimpleLampoon · 27/02/2025 10:11

You've never been the sole carer to a child elderly or disabled person have you? c

anyway congrats on being so perfect 🙄

TheProvincialLady · 27/02/2025 10:11

People will say literally anything to stop other people from talking about exercise. It is unbelievably boring and running tops the league for boringness. Even amongst people who do exercise it’s still tedious in the extreme. Just stop talking about it and you never need to be annoyed by other people. More importantly, nor will other people be annoyed by you.

dizzydizzydizzy · 27/02/2025 10:12

They don't prioritise exercise so they need a reasonable-sounding excuse. If it is a high priority, you'll find time to do it.

It reminds me of people who used to say to me incredulously when I was a student "how to have the cash for a flight abroad every holiday????" I used to stay with friends so didn't have other costs). I always used to answer "because I never ever go to the pub".