First dates... splitting the bill.

[NovemberMorn]

Is it unreasonable to expect the male to pay the full bill on a first date dining out?
I watch the programme 'First Dates' on TV, and it amazes me how, in this day and age, so many women either don't offer to split the food bill, or mutter something half-heartedly as the man gets his cc out, obviously not expecting to pay a penny.

@JenniferBooth I think anyone who has an affair is a disgrace, irrelevant of gender.

My marriage has been sexless for over 28 years.

Now your answer to this will show how far your ideas of feminism really go

@JenniferBooth End it before entering into another relationship. No excuse whatsoever for affairs.

Dont have to now Marriage is now open on my side. Affair was 20 years ago.

@JenniferBooth As long as all parties are happy with this then that's absolutely the prerogative of everyone involved.

So?

Having an affair is still a moral failing.

There are multiple options that can be selected instead of deciding to just cheat. Unless you had an open and frank discussion with your spouse and it was agreed to open the marriage in which case that would be an affair.

Which i did as i already posted above. When DH and i started dating i was almost 19 and he was 42 It was a long time ago.
Society has no problem with feminism when it involves women opening their purses Women and their emotional and sexual needs............not so much.

Cheating is is a moral issue not a sex specific one

Society judges cheats - nothing to do with whether they’re male or female.

Nowhere judges like Mumsnet posters...hopefully none of them live in glass houses.🙄

Well I’ve never cheated and I’m not the one trying to shoehorn their cheating into a thread about splitting the bill so maybe roll your eyes at the ones derailing the thread

I think the thread was derailed a long time ago.😆

I personally have never, and would never, cheat on a partner.
But if all parties have decided upon an open relationship (again, absolutely not something I would choose) then that's up to them. It's not cheating if all parties consent.
Not sure what this has to do with feminism or spilling the bill for that matter?

Some good people cheat, some total shits wouldn't dream of being unfaithful, it takes all kinds.

You can’t be a good person and cheat. You just can’t.

A truly good person would be honest and upfront with their partner. Which would not be cheating.

Of course you can.
Good people sometimes do bad things, no one is perfect.

In an ideal world no one would cheat on their partners, but then in an ideal world there would never be a reason to cheat.
Some people are serial cheaters, grabbing at every opportunity to get a quick leg over with anything with a pulse.
Others may fall in love with someone else, but not want to split a home with children up.
Others may be in a desperate situation and an affair happens because they feel trapped or frightened within their marriage.
Religion, culture, family, countless reasons why people can't just leave one relationship and fall into another.
Not all those people will be bad, that's a far too black/white way of looking at it.

I said what I said.

Good people do not use deceit, go behind their partners back and betray them.

Sometimes listening to another argument can challenge a long held belief, obviously not in your case, and that's your prerogative.

I agree. Cheats are liars who continually lie to their partners faces - that’s not a good person imo.

People can come up with whatever excuses they want for cheating but when you’ve stood at the funeral of someone who committed suicide over her husband cheating, no excuses wash

Exactly this. Only if you are both aware there is a large income difference one of the two might pay the full bill.

It’s unreasonable and outdated to expect men to pay. I’d always offer to pay or go 50/50.
While I agree it is outdated expecting a bloke to pay it wouldn't necessarily be going 50/50 unless we've had roughly the same.

I watch First Dates it's brilliant, there was a woman on it who did just this, let the man pay the bill when she had no intention of seeing him again. Not going to lie it really irked me!!

It's entertaining to eavesdrop on people who are on a first date.
No doubt a lot of it is edited for the viewers entertainment, but I do think if a woman is happy to let some mug pay for her expensive meal, knowing full well she has no intention of seeing him again, it doesn't show her in a very good light.

I think that would apply both in the 1970s and the 2000s.