Need a OTT message for a goodbye card to nasty colleague.

[WorkRelatedName]

Posting here for traffic.

For the last 4 years, I have worked with an older male colleague who made my working life hell. Long story short, he would gaslight me, take credit for my work and ideas and put me down at any given opportunity which made him look good to others. He is idolised in our department by some, including our line manager, who at the time, would play down my concerns, even with written evidence and screenshots.

Anyway, he has just announced he is retiring and a card is being sent round the team to sign.

I know if I don't sign it, it will look like he has got to me (which he has), but I don't want to give him the satisfaction of that, so I thought of writing something over the top, that to anyone else reading it when signing it, won't see I'm being sarcastic and already counting down the hours until he goes!

Yes this is probably petty, but I know mumsnet is great for things like this to help me with.

Bye

Exactly, how childish trying to get one up on someone.
Stop giving it heads pace Just sign your name or don't sign.
He's not going to care anyway.

A horrible man at my workplace was retiring. He had tried to stir up trouble for a couple of us so I donated ½p to the collection (it was a long time ago!) and just signed my name using my first initial, no message (e.g. J. Smith).
So very petty but it made me feel good!

Dont sign it , he is going (thank goodness) move on, it may come back to bite you if you did write something a bit nasty in works time and he was still an employee.

May your future hold all you so richly deserve...

Definitely this. Anything else lets him know you’re thinking about him. Let him leave thinking you barely notice his existence and will have forgotten him almost immediately.

Have a nice life.

Yourname.

Wishing you everything in retirement that you richly deserve.
Hoping everything you deserve comes your way in retirement.

“Wishing you a long and fulfilling retirement. Your unique approach to teamwork will certainly be missed!” (But not by you 😆)

“Retirement is a time to relax and reflect on your career, I’m sure you’ll have plenty to think about!”

“Enjoy this next chapter of your life. The workplace will be a very different place without you around!”

“Wishing you happiness and fulfilment in retirement, just as you’ve brought to those around you.”

“Enjoy your well-earned rest! Some of us have been counting down to this moment for quite some time.”

You could just sign your name. Nothing more. No-one can complain that you haven't signed the card!

I like some of these responses though. Would love to be brave enough to write "have the retirement you deserve"

Or, to be really naughty, find a pen that only glows in UV light and write a really rude message that he'll probably never see, but which you know is there!

This is my favourite.

All the best to you and Louise

(assuming Louise isn’t his wife’s name)

Happy Requirement - much love, Fred from Accounts

Do you ever initial anything at work rather than sign it?

If you do, your general incomprehensible squiggle for that will suffice - and no having other people look at the card when signing to think 'that was a bit off, looking at her in a new light - Bob had a point, didn't he?' that way.

You could draw something cute, like a balloon 🎈 and put your name underneath

"I was very pleased to learn you are retiring, I hope you have the retirement you truly deserve"

"Bye! Carter"

Though honestly I just wouldn't sign it, and I wouldn't care about what he thought of that.

‘I certainly got to know you well. Regards.’

"At last!" And a smiley face.

Love this one too.

Realistically, though, stick to Best Wishes WRN or just WRN. And put him out of your mind, as best you can.

You'll be mist you little angle x

this made me laugh brilliant!

Draw a childish wilted flower and then your name underneath. Or just your name.

The first line of the old Gaelic blessing:
May the road rise up to meet you.

I always envisage it as someone planking face first into the tarmac.