Delivery man using toilet

[Fountofwisdom]

I admit I am a bit of a clean freak at best of times. Can’t bear people wearing shoes inside etc. But really don’t like workmen, etc using my bathroom.

A delivery driver arrived earlier with some kitchen appliances, just delivering, not installing. He asked to use the bathroom and I immediately wanted to say no, as I HATE strangers in my bathroom. But didn’t feel I could refuse.

So he was in bathroom for a minute or so and went on his way. I went in to clean the toilet as I always would, and not only had he used it, but he left a big black pubic hair on the toilet seat 🤮🤮 Absolutely revolting.

Have spent 5 minutes deep cleaning and disinfecting toilet and have put the hand towel in wash because I’m so disgusted.

AIBU to refuse access to my bathroom in future? Or am I over-reacting?

i will have builders in for 2 weeks shortly and obviously they will want to use the bathroom, which I’m not delighted about but can’t be helped. Means I’ll have to clean the toilet every day, but I can’t refuse them using it.

But random delivery men - would you refuse? And what would you say?

If you can't handle someone using the toilet in your house without thoroughly disinfecting it afterwards I'm guessing you never use public toilets (pubs, supermarkets, cafe's, restaurants etc).

This is what I would do. 👆

OP if you are uncomfortable with builders using your bathroom, as am I , then you could get a portaloo.

Yep, totally over the top and quite ridiculous

Is the issue here a person using your toilet?
Or is the issue your worries about what a single hair might do to result in a ‘deep clean’? Honest question. What did a deep clean protect you from?

I wouldn’t say no, but I wouldn’t be happy about it. And I would give everything a wipe over when they’d left and change the hand towel.

If it was an upstairs bathroom, I would just say husband is in the bath/shower. We have a guest loo, so probably let them use that.
I am the same though, about other people using our loo.

As someone who has colitis I would never refuse someone the use of a toilet.

As to the builders they normally provide their own portaloo

You don't have to agree, but it's a kind thing to do.
Most people including builders and delivery drivers, don't leave a mess behind them in a stranger's house. We've had a lot of building work done in the last few years, and it has never happened. The worst thing is the loo seat being left up.

You found a pube? In a toilet? My goodness, what a delicate little flower you are.

Good grief! A pube in the loo! Horrors!

Honestly, you’d think from all the fuss it was in your lunchtime salad! Why on earth did that require a deep clean?! You do realise that every single person who uses your toilet potentially puts a whole load of pubes on the seat? Do you deep clean after every single one??

If you’d found crabs I would understand the reaction, but honestly, it’s just body hair. Everyone has it!

I wouldn't say no, but I feel as you do, I hate strangers using my toilet. I am grateful I have a downstairs one so no need for anyone to go upstairs.
My two worst experiences were when a man fitting the front door used the toilet and didn't flush, and when a kitchen designer took ages in the toilet and did a very smelly poo which stunk the place out (poor thing may have had a bug or IBS).
I wish I could be laid back and relaxed about my toilet but I just can't.

Would you have been OK with it if the delivery driver had been a woman? Is it strangers or men in particular that you are uncomfortable with?

Yes you are overreacting. Its not nice, but its just one of those things. Its not like he did a giant poo and didnt flush. Or blocked your toilet with it all

He possibly didn't wash his hands! 🤔.
When we were having an extension done I wish we ordered a portaloo. I was pregnant at the time so I needed the toilet a lot.

Well of course he used the toilet. What did you think he asked for? Shock horror. A human with pubic hair! What exactly is disgusting about having pubic hair? I daresay you've left the odd hair behind yourself before and not even been aware or it. Either way a tad OTT.

Can people not see how horrible it is, feeling pressured to allow an entitled hairy assed man who doesn't clean up after themselves, into our bathrooms?

Realistically, most won't have additional needs and should be managing themselves better to use a pub / shop / public loos so they don't put upon us in this way.

I certainly wouldn't deny a workman the use of the loo, and a delivery man I'd imagine would have to be pretty desperate to ask.

But I can't say I'd be delighted if it was evident they had done a poo. I'm a strictly one movement first thing in the morning type of person. I would not need to or feel comfortable going in a strangers house. But equally, you can't really hold in a crap! Not for long anyway.

I'd say if it really does cause you that much anxiety you could pay to have a portaloo put in the garden while the builders are working in your house? But to me a portaloo is grosser than them going in my house for some reason!

but he left a big black pubic hair on the toilet seat 🤮🤮 Absolutely revolting.

I'm afraid that's a total overreaction, it's just a hair. No different to one from your head.

We had a decorator in a few years ago and she left period blood on the toilet seat! And the tampon wrapper half out of the bin. Do people not glance back to check??

YABU. For most people, the offending pube would just cause a momentary 'yuck' and then be forgotten. I'm afraid I have no patience with 'clean freaks' unless they are diagnosed with OCD. Of course it's ridiculous to not allow them to use your toilet. I mean... what goes down a toilet isn't particularly pleasant whoever it is using it.

Seriously? A ginger joke? In 2025?

Well, as long as you never use anyone elses toilet I suppose you are not being unreasonable. But it doesn't seem very civilised to deny someone doing work for your benefit access to toilet faciities when needed

Happened to my daughter in law but the delivery man obviously had some sort of tummy upset and left it in a disgusting mess. Poor girl was traumatised for days.

hardly works if you have a downstairs cloakroom.

Gotta admit I'm the same. I don't even like my own brother using my toilet when he visits. Same with female visitors. I remember years ago a friend of my Mum's used our loo at home and left THE WORST SMELL I have ever smelt. I remember saying to my Mum afterwards, 'Can she not just save it for her own house??'