Delivery man using toilet

[Fountofwisdom]

I admit I am a bit of a clean freak at best of times. Can’t bear people wearing shoes inside etc. But really don’t like workmen, etc using my bathroom.

A delivery driver arrived earlier with some kitchen appliances, just delivering, not installing. He asked to use the bathroom and I immediately wanted to say no, as I HATE strangers in my bathroom. But didn’t feel I could refuse.

So he was in bathroom for a minute or so and went on his way. I went in to clean the toilet as I always would, and not only had he used it, but he left a big black pubic hair on the toilet seat 🤮🤮 Absolutely revolting.

Have spent 5 minutes deep cleaning and disinfecting toilet and have put the hand towel in wash because I’m so disgusted.

AIBU to refuse access to my bathroom in future? Or am I over-reacting?

i will have builders in for 2 weeks shortly and obviously they will want to use the bathroom, which I’m not delighted about but can’t be helped. Means I’ll have to clean the toilet every day, but I can’t refuse them using it.

But random delivery men - would you refuse? And what would you say?

I haven't been great following this thread but I'm guessing that the delivery man was in her home, and the bathroom is generally just down the hall. It's more convenient for him to quickly use hers that go out of this way to an establishment.
Asking to use someone's bathroom is not a criminal offense.

In fact, I live in a first floor flat and I asked him to leave the boxes at the doorway. But he went up first with the largest box and walked it into the hallway. Fair enough, maybe he was being kind with that. But he then went to retrieve 2 much smaller boxes and I offered to take them at the main entrance. He said, “no, I need to take them in” and marched upstairs and into the flat again. I presumed he needed to take a photo as proof of delivery. Then he immediately said “Can I use the washroom?” No ‘please’. I was so surprised I didn’t have time to think of an excuse. When he came back out, he didn’t say ‘thank you’ either. Just walked down the hall and out. So it wasn’t as if he was remotely friendly or polite.

Oh course you can. Small independent cafes and restaurants no but big places like Harvesters and MacDs course you can nip in.
Folk like this delivery driver just take the piss and rely on the inability of some people to say no.

I wouldn’t be bothered with using my best china if they needed a glass of water and stood at the door to drink it. I’d offer it. As long as they weren’t peeing in it of course

I wonder how much this decreased the value of the work he did 😱

This thread is so mean spirited and sad.

I’m the OP and the delivery driver was a complete stranger.

No

Very generous

I wouldn’t refuse, they often have to pee in bottles. I clean the toilet every day anyway so it wouldn’t bother me.

Which is interesting as most these days say they can only deliver at the door threshold and won’t walk over it.
( unless they are plumbing something in of course )
So sounds like he had a plan OP

How else do you expect someone to deliver a whole kitchen worth of units? Prop then up outside and leave OP to bring them in?

ETA that I was mistaken. Kitchen appliances, not units.

I work in a place where there are plenty of toilets so its easy for me. Other workers are not so lucky. On the road all day without access.

Sure somebody can pull into an establishment but that it time consuming. Delivery drivers are under pressure.

People who get their knickers in a twist have very little to be worrying about. It's what toilets were made for.

When I wrote my dissertation on violence against women in uni I got in trouble for the sentence’All men are potential rapists’ so I get where you are coming from, but you really can’t live your life assuming every man you meet is. And in any case he wasn’t, was he? He delivered the appliance and (maybe) a pube and went in his way without threatening you at all.

I haven’t got OCD, and at no point have I said that. It’s various other people who have bandied that term about on this thread. As far as I’m aware, OCD is a debilitating and distressing condition and I think it’s really ignorant to bandy that term about, or indeed any other terms related to MH. Someone else on this thread has told me I ‘need therapy’ - because I object to a strange man using my toilet and leaving an obvious public hair behind 🤷🏻‍♀️

Wow, I have used public toilets many a time and have survived to tell the tale. Disinfecting toilet after every visitor - that is a lot. I clean my toilet regularly, but am not quite that extreme.

Well yes that’s what a lot do these days
They aren’t insured to come into the property.
Ive had drivers shove carpets in to our house with them on the outside pushing and me inside pulling it in. They won’t go past the threshold.
The same goes for kitchens. They stack outside for you to take over the threshold ( even if it’s heavy and you’re on your own, they aren’t insured.
( unless they are fitting them )

For all the people telling me what a horrendous, unkind person I am denying poor strange men their human rights 🙄, I just want to clarify that when I do have contractors here doing work, I ALWAYS offer hot drinks, biscuits, etc. And I have even provided bacon sandwiches to removal men on an early start before now. So I’m not the dreadful witch I’m being accused of being! My only issue is the toilet and especially strange men using it and leaving it dirty.

Thank goodness. Or this would have been a very different thread

You spent 5 minutes cleaning and disinfecting the toilet and washed the hand towel, all over one pubic hair??? You must have OCD. That really isn't normal.

I think it’s pretty debilitating to be so horrified at someone leaving a hair in your house that you have to do a deep clean and wash towels, yes. Maybe see a GP and explain what you have said here.

I let the British Gas man who was servicing the boiler use the loo.

About 20 minutes late I needed to go.

I walked in there and found he'd pee'd all over the seat. I told him to go and clean it up (which he did). Dirty bird.

"Not only had he used it"? Did you think he was going in just because he was curious about the decor?

No, you can't refuse. He's doing his job and people are entitled to use the loo while at work. (How would you react to being denied bathroom access at your work?). Yes, it was a major overreaction; it sounds like your love of cleanliness has tipped over into a phobia / obsession. I'd really put some effort into overcoming this; you'll be happier in the long run.

I didn’t expect him to bring the boxes in at all. In fact the delivery emails clearly said “doorstep delivery” only. When he asked which floor, I said first floor and thanked him, but clearly said, “you can just leave it at the doorway please”, so I was slightly surprised that he marched on into my flat and down the hall with the first box. As I said in my OP, I prefer people to take their shoes off when they come in, so I didn’t want dirty boots in my hall either. But that I would have overlooked.

Wat the hell.. Good for you.. Its not like he's a child... And the fact that you had to tell him too. Piss taker!!