Half/step siblings

[Pickledeverything]

If your children have half or step siblings do you correct them when they say “brother/sister” so they use the proper term?

YABU - yes I do
YANBU - no I do not

A half sibling is still a brother or sister. Step siblings, well it's up to them how they label eachother I suppose. I don't think anyone sensible would 'correct' someone on such things?

Yes, yes you are.

Perhaps think about why they might be doing this, instead of only thinking about this from your own point of view.

There is clearly a history here which I don't know!
But I think yabu. I was brought up in a blended family and refer to my half siblings as brothers and sisters. I would have been so hurt if my parents had corrected me and reminded me that I was the outlier who came from a different set of parents.
I mean you talk about having to explain to people but really noone takes that much notice and people come from all sorts of families so no one's judging you.

After my exh and I split up, both children went to their dad's together. There Is nearly 8 years between them. My son has been raised by his (step)dad since he was a baby.

They're incredibly close and far closer than me and my (full) brother. They're 27 and 18 now. They're in contact every day, he visits her at university, they have a holiday booked together at Easter.

I think your imagination is filling in a fair few blanks here and isn't actually an accurate reflection of the lives people live or the relationships that exist.

It's not about getting flak for your comments - you're entitled to whatever opinion you like but your assumptions are just simply wrong.

It looks like you asked the question the wrong way around, asking people who do correct their children, same as you do apparently, to vote "you are being unreasonable". It should be the other way around. Maybe thats why you think 13% people agree with you when they simply clicked "unreasonable" after reading your post.

My Dd has a half brother 32 years hr senior, from the minute we knew he called her 'sister' he made it quite clear she was his sister, not half sister. Whem Dd was small.she used to call.him.'my brother called (name) ' they still say brother and sister 22 years on. Ask the children see what they say

Never. Not even come up that they’re “half”, to the kids they are their brother & sister.

I’d actually be VERY hurt if I heard my two refer to the older two as “half” and likewise the other way.
the 15yo understands the logistics, the 6yr old doesn’t, one day he’ll realise!

I had a adopted brother we didn't always get on when he passed the undertaker kept referring to him as my mum step son he wasn't he was her son.
Sometime if I'm explaining problems that he had which run in his birth family I will explain he was adopted or if people see his photo as he was off mixed race I'll explain he was adopted but mostly I say my brother their was certainly no difference to my parents

I have both. I refer to my half-brother and half-sisters as my little brother and sisters (but sometimes explain that the 20 year age gap is because they’re half-siblings). I’ve always said stepbrothers for the others, though - mainly because we didn’t see a lot of them growing up despite having a much smaller age gap, and although we’re all very cordial now, we don’t really have the same level of relationship. We do all wish each other well, though, there’s no acrimony whatsoever!

@Pickledeverything
If you had a child and then a child with another man a few years later , would you refer to your children as half siblings.
Every time people asked how many children do you have - would you say - I have two children but they are half siblings ?

Yes.

Not my DC…. but DH refers to his 1/2 siblings as brother and sister and I refer to my 1/2 brother as brother.

I would prefer my kids to just say brother or sister if it was relevant to them.

My DS has 3 ‘half’ siblings who are my exH children. If he called them a half sibling I would correct him and tell him they’re actually his brother / sisters

But they ARE his half-siblings. So you’d be incorrectly “correcting” him.

You're just as bad as the OP.

If he correctly wants to refer to his half siblings as half siblings, it's not ok for you incorrectly correct him. It's not on at all, it's weird and it's controlling

You too.
Parents, stop trying to control your childrens feelings and force relationships. If you'd be very hurt by your children telling the truth, you need therapy.

Never have or will control it.

both ways call each other brother and sister.
as I said it’s never even come up!

15yo knows, 6yo knows no different currently!!!

I find 'current husband' keeps them on their toes 😁

Steps and halves are two completely different things. If my children had step siblings then I would want them to have a lovely relationship but I wouldnt want them calling each other brother/sister.. its simply not true. But thats just my feelings and I don't pretend to understand others family situations. Half siblings, I see no need to make a distinction about the half.. they are siblings. In my experience half siblings and full siblings are the same when you grow up together but huge age gaps and/or growing up in different homes can mean they feel very 'other' and not anything like the same as your full siblings who you shared a home and childhood with.

You said you'd be very hurt by them stating a simple truth. It hasn't come up because they will know that they aren't allowed by you to feel the truth, and you do have issues.

And how does your six year old not know a simple fact about their family? So weird to hide peoples biology.

I’m a step and half sibling. My (half) sisters and I have never differentiated, neither does my baby step brother. I’m their big sister and they are my sisters. Even their dad (my step dad) and his second wife (mum of step bro) have never called me anything other than ‘sis’.

Guess it depends on the perspective and goals of the parents. Mine (step and bio parents) were major f*ck ups, but they wanted us to have each other, regardless.

I have 2 children with my ex husband and a child with my partner. 14yrs between middle daughter and youngest but they are siblings nothing less. Would break my heart them referring to each other as half siblings and had a conversation with older 2 about how if we end up dying i wouldn’t expect them to raise a young child when they have their own lives to lead and aslong as they visited her regularly she could go to foster care but they both said absolutely not she’s their little sister and would do their best to bring her up.

you know nothing of our story and given I’ve brought them up all in the same home you’d perhaps think otherwise but again perhaps not.
the 6year old knows I’m not the mother of the older 2, he doesn’t know they’re “half siblings” so if that’s weird so be it!

only weird one is you and your constant posts 🙄

OP, you sound like the paediatric nurse who decided it was a good idea to argue with my 6yo dc - who was about to undergo surgery - who told her she had three mums. She went on and on, determined to win the argument! I tried to stop her by explaining as briefly as possible that dd has two adoptive mums and a birth mum. Nurse then said, oh god is the real mum coming in too? And dad's head whipped to the door.

What a twat she was, causing a small child upset because she wanted to be 'factual'. Don't be like her, OP.