We’re spending the kids inheritance

[Tuppenceabaggy]

Does anyone find it weird when parents/older people say this and so proudly?

Ive heard a few times people saying they sacrificed everything for their kids, now it’s their time…is this a bit selfish/odd? Children don’t ask to be born, do they.

Now i’m a parent, I just find my parents and some others way of doing things quite odd.

My dad worked in a good job and Dm was a sahm. I had a part time job since I was 14, if I wanted something, I had to pay for it (except clothes treats out of Christmas and birthday money) I paid for all my own driving lessons (I had a lot and it cost a fortune) I bought my own car and paid insurance etc, Dh and I got our mortgage ourselves with no help.

Now I have Dd, there’s not a lot of spare cash to go around, but I will have a savings account in the event of going to uni (if she chooses to) helping with driving lessons and first car and hopefully a little help with a first home (provided we can try our best to save for this)

I don’t want my parents money, i’m
happy to see them spend it on themselves and enjoy it a bit, but it’s just not how I see my life, everything I think about is for Dd first.

Is this just a generational thing?

Not necessarily. Some Gen X are now nearly 60 and some gifted deposits come from them, not boomers.

Gen X is currently 45 to 59. I doubt somehow that many of them have children of house buying age.

I’m X and I would say that I regret not encouraging (insisting?) that my Dc get weekend/odd jobs from about 15 to get an appreciation of the value of work and money. Plus all the other skills to be learned.

They’re uni age and while one has cultivated a paid work routine the other has not a clue and is totally disinterested in earning at the moment although is planning on sailing into a very high earning career.

Our generation is very focused on smoothing the path for our kids but I think we should be careful.

As pps (Boomers no less) have said there is merit in encouraging hard work, resilience, independence, ambition which may be stifled by our attempts to do all we can for them.

One of the many idiocies about lumping everybody born between two arbitrary dates together is that the experience of the oldest in that group will be wildly different from the youngest. People born in 1946 were babies before the NHS had come into existence, might just about remember rationing from their early childhood, probably had parents, aunts and uncles who'd served or even died during the war and went to school during a time when virtually all children (in England and NI, anyway, not sure about Scotland and Wales) took the 11+ and ended up at either a secondary modern or a grammar school. By the time I was born in 1961 the NHS and the welfare state were well established, the war and rationing were a rapidly receding memory and National Service had been abolished. My parents were children during the war. By the time I was in my teens enormous social changes were happening, unimaginable when the 1940s babies were children.

I don't really mind. Their life is going to be so tough that a little bit of venting their stress, frustration and desperation will probably help with MH. Otherwise I don't really understand how they are going to manage in the age of ruthless exploitation.

I don't have any wealth btw. I missed the boomers boat 😁

Presumably you’ll inherit something. Or perhaps not and that’s the cause of your quite unreasonable fury.

Really? So you don't expect a 59yo person to have a 30yo offspring and you don't expect a 30yo to be of house buying age?

That says it all really.

Where is my fury? 🤔 I actually find the thread amusing.

Clearly since you’re posting bollocks on it.

Have I insulted you? Why do you feel obliged?

Never mind, we understand boomers had it the hardest :)

I also find it very weird , and actually sad. My in laws are exactly as you are describing, gave no help whatsoever to my Dh with anything, he worked from a very early age, yet they take all the credit for him doing well at work . I find that self centred, selfish people ( not that they would ever accept that they are ) are quite sad , and lonely, for obvious reasons. What a waste of life ! We are parenting our children very differently indeed .

That's how.

I think you’ll find that was an isolated incident in Paris! 😂😂😂😂

It wasn't isolated though, but you're entitled to your opinions. People on this thread freely claim the suicide rate has massively declined whilst in reality it's the highest 🤷‍♀️

Well it wasn’t common. I think if there had been frequent riots on the streets with police with batons some of us would have noticed. It took you a very long time to find a picture of a French riot in 1968.

Agreed. That particular riot made world wide front page news, so shocking was it at the time.

Boomer here but incredibly generous one 😉always give with warm hands - so no I think it’s a personality thing not a date of birth ffs.

You don't have to work in menial jobs to appreciate the value of work. Studying hard is an equivalent of work. My DC study/studied 10 hours a day, more than a standard office day. I don't see why I would deny them well deserved rest, we're not expecting adults to work non-stop until they drop, are we?

I don't see it as "smoothing their path" either.

I got my first pt job at 15 but I studied art and it was different to doing papers. Plus, I didn't have to work to pay for clothes or driving lessons etc, my boomer parents provided for me and always expected me to prioritise studies (so no, not all boomers are rubbish parents 😁 ).

Because they’re desperate to find something to support a shite narrative and they rely on the first thing they find without researching it.

Yes, I guess so. But it's so sad really...

You mean like the picture you posted in an attempt to evidence fiction? Yes, very sad.

Still trying? Try harder :)

You see, we younger generation are so good we keep speaking with the boomers directly insulting us 😁 Not that you would appreciate our patience of course 😂

You’re not that young,mate.

Idk, it seems to me we often have Boomer rebelliousness shoved down our throats, from hippies to CND, to radical feminism, to music. Also, Boomers often arguing how much better they have made the world and how ungrateful everyone is. Now, apparently, they didn’t stir anything up and never caused trouble , just all kept their generational heads down and worked hard and were resilient. 🤣

I am always a bit surprised by early parenthood because I never considered it an option, although obviously people did have families very young. Hence I'm 68 with a DC of 25.