Child Invited To Birthday Party Parents Expected To Pay

[Warrior96]

Hi so I know a child who has been invited to a birthday party, the child is 5. All the kids invited to the birthday party are 5-6 years old so parents will be expected to stay. The invitation asks the parents to pay for themselves. Am I being unreasonable to think this is a bit cheeky?

So parents are welcome to drop and go?

In which case the nominal adult admission for the soft play (it's usually a couple of pounds) if they choose to stay is reasonable. Given some family bizarrely bring 2 or more adults to parties I don't think it's unreasonable to set boundaries.

Why? What's the point of boundaries in a party in a public soft play. If it's in your house I get it, but anyone can go if they want to. I find people often take someone to chat to for the two hours you're sat there for.

5/6 is a bit young for dropping off. It depends what sort of party we’re talking about re parents having to pay

I've done lots of parties. It cost £16.50 per child for a soft play where I live. That includes a parent / carer but additional adults are £2.50 each. I put child's name plus one adult/ carer on the invite. However, I think it's incredibly rude to invite people and expect them to pay.

Going to parties is expense. I usually buy a gift equivalent to the invite. Then I'm using my weekend to attend. I don't expect to pay for the privilege.

I wouldnt drop and leave. I don't leave my kids with randoms. Just because they are my child's friends parents doesn't mean they are safe adults. I don't know them from Adam.

It's not gatecrashing if it's a public place with paid entry. They just wouldn't be able to eat the food.

A venue once wanted £10 in order for adults to stay. I could've dropped and ran but additional needs meant I couldn't.

It's ridiculous. Parents shouldn't be charged to stay for a party.

Something like this happened at my DS’s fourth birthday party, which was at a trampoline place. You had to pay for a parent to supervise 4 and under aged children. I didn’t read it properly and thought you didn’t have to pay for an adult for four and up. I did pay in the end but it added a massive £85 to the already substantial amount! Never mind, DS enjoyed it!

I went to a LOT of soft play parties when DS was at the nursery/reception to Y1 age and accompanying adults never had to pay, it was included in the party package … are you sure the venue actually requires payment?

Well that's what they've decided to invite you to isn't it? They're paying for your child but not you. So you accept or decline on those terms. Hopefully that's what people will do and not accept and chunter behind the birthday parents back.

I think that is fine. If they were insisting that a parent stays that's a different matter. They're not. They're saying 'if you choose to stay, when you don't have to, then you will need to pay entry.' That's fine.

Drop and go!

I’ve never had to pay to stay at a soft play party. Even those were adults did have to pay admission. I’d either suck up the £2 or whatever it was or I’d drop and run

Can't believe how many people would leave a 5 year old with random people!

I work in a soft play. Adults are allowed in free and must supervise their children. We allow over 100 children in and never have more than 3 staff so it would be impossible for us to supervise children.

My children are adults now, but when they were little we had plenty of parties. Never once expected parents to stay, even from 3 year olds. Had plenty of family members to help out if it were a pool party, for instance.

Times have clearly changed so now you have to pay to attend someone’s birthday party.

If t isn't obligatory then it is up to you/the parent if they choose to stay.

Venue likely to be cheekier than the party hosts

I dont see the issue. I would go back and say I won’t be staying but xx child is coming and will be left with them

Or if I wanted to stay I would be happy to pay

Round my way, it's normal to drop and run at 5. Some did it at 3. Others at 7. But 5 would be the average.

From the hosts point of view. Say it's £10 per head adult or child. They have a budget of £100 (for ease of maths) So their birthday child can either invite 9 of his actual friends or 4 of his friends and a parent each. I'm sure the child would far rather his friends use his budget rather than their parents.

I’ve never known a soft play party include parents as part of the total number!

5/6 is to young to be dropping off can't believe how many people are suggested it.

We went to one we had to pay for adults. If it’s anything like the one we went to. They did sleepovers and adults only nights. Honestly I would pay it they had these massive drop slides the adults had as much fun as the kids.😂😂😂Was like being back in Blackpool funhouse.

How do you know they are "expected to stay" - what does in invite actually say?

Is it optional to stay? If it’s optional to stay then YABU. You prefer to stay so you should pay. I would stay and wouldn’t care about paying.

Think about it - it’s probably around £300 just for the kids. Would you want to add another couple of £100 on? But what’s an extra £10 to you if you prefer to stay.

This is a marketing ploy that the birthday kids parent has either fallen for and not thought through, doesn't care, or is actually earning on by getting in for free or a voucher if X turn up

See also overly-overpriced pay bars in "free" bookable venues

Sounds like they are trying to save the cost of a party package by doing a kind of DIY party, otherwise the adults would be included.

At that age I know a couple of parents who would drop and run but most would stay and supervise as they’re still young enough to want their parent if they hurt themselves or need a hand finding where the toilets are etc.