To ask them to put the heating on,?

[AnnaQuayInTheUk]

If you're a guest in someone's house, is it ok to ask them to turn the heating on/up?

I live in an old draughty house with big single glazed sash windows, so I'm quite used to being chilly. We try to keep the house at about 18, it's very difficult to get it above that but if a guest was cold I would have no issues with plugging in additional heaters etc.

I'm currently staying with my mum for a few days. She lives with her partner and has moved into his house. It's freezing. The living room has a thermometer in it and it's currently 13C. It's a modernish house, fully double glazed and centrally heated.

They split the bills. They are quite well off - nice cars, several holidays a year - so it's not a money issue. According to mum, her partner thinks it's wasteful if they put the heating on during the day, as they are out a lot. They are both retired. They do go out a lot but usually one or both come home at lunchtime. They are usually both in by 5pm but the heating doesn't come on until nearer to 6.

I'm trying to work from here for a few days. I am so cold it's difficult to concentrate. AIBU to ask (insist?) that the heating is on during the day?

£600 jakers we were on oil in the rural house. That's a tank of oil.

@HauntedBungalow why do you feel the need to be so rude?

OP the reason the house feels freezing cold is the've done that old-person thing and switched half the radiators off!

Depends how close I am to them. My mom and dad I would ask to turn it on / down.

Other people? I just sit with my coat and scarf on and wait for them to get the hint.

Well they are in this afternoon and have turned the heating on so that's great.

I was watching what my mum's partner ate at lunchtime - a huge bowl of Haddock and Potato Chowder, a large granary roll with ham and salad, an avocado, a banana and a yoghurt. He always eats two bowls of cereal and two pieces of toast for breakfast. He eats a lot but is really quite thin. I've decided he eats so much because he's having to burn calories to stay warm!

And last night he ate 2 jacket potatoes (admittedly not huge ones, but mum and I only ate one each) with chicken casserole and veg, followed by ice cream followed by cheese and biscuits.

He would have gone for a cycle ride this afternoon but it's pouring with rain so he's in his (unheated) workshop mending something or other. He never actually sits down which is why he's always warm!

@AnnaQuayInTheUk what if you just used eg a portable heater for the section you use if they say no ?

Did you mean to ask me such a stupid question?

I'd just ask your mum if she minds you putting the heating on as it's freezing. Are they really going to say no? Take them out of a meal or something if you're staying with them.

Do you live in a huge house or is it poorly insulated? My power bills are £85 a month - down quite a bit on last year because I had new double glazing installed. It’s paying for itself. And that’s an 1860ish cottage with no damp course or insulation through the walls.

@Ddakji well I’m assuming you put a layer or two on to adapt for the temperature. That’s what a lot of us do inside in winter.

I’m assuming you put a layer or two on to adapt for the temperature. That’s what a lot of us do inside in winter.

If you're outside you're generally moving though, if it's cold. You'll be out for a reason, you wouldn't just layer up and go and sit in the cold.

I don’t know about @Ddakji but I put a coat on to go outside. Scarf, gloves and hat too if necessary. I don’t tend to have those on in the house or to make a trip to the loo.

I see the competitive warmth misers are out in force.

When I were't kid, we used t'ave tu't sleep in't ice cube.

It's 1 degree in't my 'ouse 'n' I 'ad tu't strip down tu't me pants & socks afore I melted. What? Me lips am always blue when I'm too 'ot.

If you like money more than warmth, go for it but don't impose it on everybody else.

Just turn up the heat and if anything is said, chuck a fiver at him.

Well, I've just solved the mystery of how my Mum stays warm. I popped downstairs to make a cup of coffee and she was in the living room skipping. Round their very large coffee table whilst watching some property programme. Apparently she does 50 minutes of this if she's ever in the house for the afternoon. Not just skipping, she also does hopping (although for some reason not jumping) and some lunges.

I just hope I have her energy if I ever get to her age!

Gosh I referred to people on Teams Meetings in the middle of winter without any layers ie wearing t shirts and I now seem to be some sort of monster because I wear a jumper instead of heating an entire house for one person.

@AnnaQuayInTheUk I bet your mum and her partner enjoy a long and healthy old age - good luck to them.

They sound amazing!

They are very fit and active. Mum's partner plays golf several times a week, rides his bike all over the place and also never sits still. Mum walks to the village shop (a mile away) most mornings, then is out at various activities most days - weekly choir practice, weekly art group, weekly volunteering in village shop (community shop), monthly book group etc.

Then they usually go out somewhere one day a week, they are near the Cotswolds so live a day out looking at antiques shops and having coffee and cake somewhere.

Gosh, I hope I'm that fit and active if I make old bones! (Although I expect I'll want the heating on a bit more than that 😅)

Yes it's large but it is insulated to the maximum that is economically viable.

Ironically our new "efficient" boiler costs more to run than the 1970s one it replaced at a cost of £6000 (had to be re-sited due to new regs).

I did read that having the heating on too high could led to impaired metabolism and encourage obesity. But I think this was people who have the heating on constantly at 22 degrees.

13 degrees is a bit extreme. I think your mum and partner could afford to have daytime temp at 18 degrees (falling at night) and still get the metabolic benefits (and without being uncomfortable).

But it does certainly sound like they are fit & healthy!

@wfhwfh there’s a whole lot of research suggesting turning your thermostat down has considerable health benefits, particularly cardiovascular and metabolism related but also mood. Michael Mosley did a whole programme on it. Also latest research has suggested that (unless you’re elderly or have health issues of course) the guidelines of 18-21C are unnecessarily high for most people.

A mindboggling stupid question from that poster that isn’t worthy of a response.

Also latest research has suggested that (unless you’re elderly or have health issues of course) the guidelines of 18-21C are unnecessarily high for most people.

18 is barely comfortable.

I moved house because I couldn't get my old house warm enough!
Being cold unnecessarily is a miserable way to live.