To not give her a lift?

[DreamingOfHotPotatoes]

My child does an activity, once a week, that's roughly a 30 minute drive from my house, so an hour long round trip.

However, one of the parents, who I have never spoken to, has asked other parents where I live, and on discovering that I drive past her house, has decided that I will be taking her child to and from the activity from now on. She has not asked me this! Last week she just left the child at the activity and told the child I would be giving them a ride home. I gave the child a ride home, but not willingly! This child shoved my child out of the way and demanded the front seat, then kicked the back of my seat the whole way home. My child has autism and really needs a quiet car on the way home to decompress, this was quite an ordeal for her.

I'm taking my daughter to her activity later and I'm having anxiety over it happening again. Am I being unreasonable for not wanting to give this child a ride home?!

This is the bit I really don’t get.

‘Yea if you need me to drop them off I will. Although, your kid is a as-hole, so I’ll have to do two trips. Ask the leaders if they’re ok to stay with your kid while I drop mine home. It’ll prob be about £20 though for extra fuel etc.’

also ‘dunno if you’re aware of the times, but the village is dead’

I believe the expression is 'jumped the shark'.

Wow. Shark well and truly jumped there.

Why? People do these things.

Lately it seems that every third or fourth thread that gets any traction is some wild story which is, in parts, so erm..surprising, or maybe baffling and scant on logical detail that it's hard to erm..not believe, that's not the word I am looking for. Understand. Let's plump for hard to understand how in heaven's name those events came about as described. I've been interacting with human beings for 59 years and I've seen all sorts, but I don't recognise the behaviours or conversations in some of these stories. I mean I believe they are true if the OP says they are. I just don't recognise them and have never experienced anything remotely similar myself. Or know anyone who has.

I'm never sure whether posters just go a bit heavy on the hyperbole, lending their posts a fantastical quality, or whether they just move in circles where the human beings behave very, very differently from the ones I've been interacting with.

I would not wish to cast aspersions on any thread, I give every poster the benefit of the doubt including this one. Because I don't want to get deleted. But gosh some of these threads lately do push my credulity to its limits. Again, not this one. Just some.

Some days MN reads like those clickbait Bored Panda or Buzzfeed stories that pop up on my facebook feed.

So the wronged woman wants her husband's suspected mistress to drive their child home and leave her in the house with a stranger, and there is no written proof that she ever requested the OP to do this? What could possibly go wrong? This has all the hallmarks of a Harlen Coben TV thriller. Be careful OP, I think she might be setting you up so she can accuse you of something terrible and get you arrested and have your autistic child removed from your care. Did you not watch Play Nice?

I mean you did say, several pages back, when you were bewildered over why everyone was on your case 'I wonder if someone has been spreading things that aren't true.' And it turns out they were right! Your spidey senses are strong.

This is shocking behaviour, is there any way you can contact the dad?

Nobody wondered why CF was insisting on husbands affair partner to give rides for her child

I meant you were right. It turns out YOU were right about someone spreading lies about you.

But if the child's mum is having an affair with the group leader, then surely driving the child home is fine?

OMG please don't quit the group! This is gossip solid gold! I thought it was strange the way the other parents were treating you but now with this update its imperative you continue just so you can feed me more gossip.

What a wild ride. Sorry you were chosen to be the guilty party but I'm sure once all the crap comes out your name will be restored. (and I can't believe they thought they'd get away with such an incredible lie)

YANBU! Horrendous behaviour on behalf of the other mum who has clearly and unsurprisingly raised a brat. I can't get over the cheek of it! I would tell the leader of the activity that you have not agreed with that child's parent that you would take them home. It will then be up to the activity leader to ring the child's parent and tell them to come and collect them.

Don't worry! The Activity Leader can just bring the child to her mother on his way to meet her for their secret affair!!

Did you speak to the child’s mum when you dropped them off? Have you got their number?
’Sorry, have plans going forward after this activity to won’t be travelling directly home so
won't be able to bring xxxx home again’ if you don’t want any kind of confrontation.
Personally, I’d tell the mum that they were out of order & I’ll not be bringing their rude, badly behaved child home again - & to have been asked would’ve been nice! I get that that approach isn’t for everyone though!!

if you are unable to directly inform the mother, you can just tell the child that you are not returning home/on that route because you are going elsewhere, but they can tell the teacher to call their mother to pick them up. it's a bit harsh on the child but it's the mother's fault.

All these posters STILL just giving advice on the OP's first post! 🙄

Cancel the child

No I wouldn't be doing it. It's very rude of her not to ask but even if she did why should you take her every week? Even if they live on the way she should be offering to do some of the drop offs and pick up (appreciate you wouldn't want her to).

A child in DS school lives nearby and then called on us far too often to take and pick up their DC they both went to and then sometimes not turning up to get them until an hour after we got back clearly thinking it was fine to just dump their (slightly pain on the ass) child with us.

DS is starting a new activity soon and I'm hoping they don't send their DC as I don't want to be asked for lifts. I don't mind occasionally but there is something most weeks with these people.

Do you think it's ruder not to ask for a lift, or ruder to intimate that OP had an affair with CF's husband?? All the while carrying on her own affair with the activity leader?
Hmmmm 🤔

penguin bollard

@TrustyRusty68 - @DreamingOfHotPotatoes said the mum wasn’t even there, when she dropped the child off. She had to leave the child with the lodger!

Why should you move your child's group.
Are you not tempted to put your own msg on the chat and 'clear things up'?

Or are you that p***d at the activity leader that you can't stand to take your child there?

I'd be posting in the group chat and calling the CF out on their behaviour- towards you, not their adultery.

I hope all the other parents who stuck their oars in with the village comments find out the truth and have the balls to say something.

If the other parents are that concerned let them sort the child out regardless of what direction they're going in.Your priority is your child and not putting her out of her comfort zone. THE NERVE OF SOME PEOPLE.

I would post the truth to all of them.