While I'm here - is make up remover a toiletry parents should provide?

[Homeymum2]

We supply of course deodorant, soaps, shampoo, conditioner - and even fancy hair products - but I don't buy the make up - so I feel like the removal is also her responsibility -

I'm not opposed to make up - I'm just consider it a luxury to buy with her spending money - not mine

My thoughts too.

I've just spend £35 on Epiduo acne cream and yes I support buying anything which prevents breakouts etc. Make up - her job. It's hard enough being a teenager

Bloody hell! No chocolate. No cleanser. Poor kid.

If I’m in Boots or a supermarket with any of my kids (or if I’m going and I ask if they need anything) and they say they need anything like that, I buy it (including uni age).

This is similar to what I did with my son, though regarding haircuts not makeup. Previously, I had paid for his visits to the barber, but when he wanted to go every 2-3 weeks (to maintain his ‘skin fade’), we looked again at his allowance and incorporated a rough amount for toiletries etc as opposed to buying everything in with ours. We could then Include the frequency of haircuts we were happy to pay for. Any extra visits he then paid for himself, so he had to prioritise what he spent the rest on and/or use his paper round money. It worked well for us.

Yes! I want to teach my teen how to take take of their skin and makeup removal is a seriously important step. How do you expect them to do this if you don't provide it? Do they need to buy their own tissues/cotton wool/earbuds too? It's literally a basic that anyone who wears make up needs. You don't need to buy one from Harrods, Simple, Boots basic or Garnier will do.

Ha ha this is a funny one. My youngest DD gets £110 pm pocket money between us and grandparents. When I suggested that she buy her own cleanser - her argument was it’s to wash her face and did she have to spend her own money to wash herself. I got the cleanser 🤣

One of the things I love is to nurture and provide for my 2 daughters.
your thread makes me sad, I was brought up by a resentful and angry parent who did less than the bare minimum. I never asked for even essentials because this saved being disappointed. Every month was traumatic and embarrassing, I was hungry and scratching round for basic needs.

your dd may have different priorities to you but I don’t think she’s making unreasonable demands. I bet she dreads every time her deodorant or conditioner runs low or she needs new pads as it sounds like it’s a big deal to have to approach you.

be honest with yourself. You don’t have to share on here. Why can’t/won’t you nurture and support her? Is it due to your own neglect or poor parenting when you were a child so you withhold from her. Several people have asked if you have male dc and if so are you difficult in your attitude to them as well? I can’t see that you’ve responded to questions about whether she has her own allowance to buy stuff.

your poor dd. Don’t always be looking for loopholes to give her the bare minimum. It’s so miserable

Yabu

With makeup you need to remove and cleanse so essentially wash twice... massage and dissolve and then wash

So definitely need a cleanser and remover

My kids have pretty good pocket money amongst their friends and my broad rule is, I provide basics of everything they need and if they want fancy brands/designer then they buy it (or pay the difference).

so basic branded cleanser, face wash, cloths, cotton pads etc are available in the bathroom (I use basic brands myself so they can just use mine) but they all (3 girls, 11-18) buy themselves extra fancy products.

Oh OP your posts are sad & they're making me feel so sorry for your dd.

I think you've had good advice here to have a think about why you're finding providing care for her so challenging.

It's pretty depressing reading and it makes me wonder how happy your home/ family is....

I've always provided all toiletries my children needed. Now my daughter lives abroad but when she comes home for a few days she just uses my stuff. I think that's fine, wouldn't want it any other way.

I couldn’t get worked up about this. I buy make up remover wipes which my daughter also uses. If she’s feeling fancy she can buy fancy shit herself.

How old is your child?

I buy my son a decent face cleanser and moisturiser to help with his acne. How is make up remover any different to cleanser? Micellar water and reusable face wipes aren't going to break the bank!

Were you brought up the same way by your own mother? You have such an abnormally cold parenting style towards your own daughter.

Just buy it. Why would you get obsessed by something so irrelevant. You won't teach her the value of money this way, you'll teach her that you aren't in her corner.

Of course it is - makeup removing cleansing face wipes are easy & cheap. Why are you being so stingy towards your DD?

Definitely you should provide cleanser, its very important to establish good skin care early 2 of my 3 children have had acne, so need good cleanser moisturiser tablets dermatologist cost a fortunebut needes to be sorted. If im in boots ill ask whats needed they use la roche posay as good for bad skin you need to provide these.