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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

While I'm here - is make up remover a toiletry parents should provide?

169 replies

Homeymum2 · 04/02/2025 16:38

We supply of course deodorant, soaps, shampoo, conditioner - and even fancy hair products - but I don't buy the make up - so I feel like the removal is also her responsibility -

I'm not opposed to make up - I'm just consider it a luxury to buy with her spending money - not mine

OP posts:
Barrenfieldoffucks · 04/02/2025 18:09

nosyupnorth · 04/02/2025 16:54

I'd consider an appropriate facial cleanser a standard toiletry (and for most teens dealing with hormonal changes to their skin proper cleanser is appropriate and nevermind any 'in my day we just had soap and water' attitudes), and a facial cleanser should remove makeup.

If she's wanting premium products or getting through gallons of the stuff because she's having to use loads to take off caked on foundation/waterproof mascara etc then there is an arguement she should be contributing, but a basic product in sufficient quantities to wash her face (including of light makeup) morning and evening should be considered an expected thing to provide, either buying it for her or included in the budget for her to buy her own toiletries.

Agreed. I but decent face wash we can share, likewise moisturiser, shampoo, conditioner, hair protectant, serum, shower gel etc.

If she wants anything different or fancy she gets it, unless it is a specific thing/need and not just a 'want'.

I also bought her a decent razor with a subscription for blades to be delivered.

I'd rather she used decent stuff properly and didn't end up damaging her skin etc.

But the , I don't mind her using my products, hair styling equipment etc as long as she looks after it, tells me if it runs out and if it goes into her room she tells me if I'm looking for it.

RaininSummer · 04/02/2025 18:10

Biy her a bottle of micellar water and some reusable bamboo face pads. That will keep her going ages.

Barrenfieldoffucks · 04/02/2025 18:10

Homeymum2 · 04/02/2025 18:06

I do buy face wash 🙄 - it's just not specific for removing makeup - more targeted for blemishes

Surely all face wash will remove make up if used properly/thoroughly?

Dishwashersaurous · 04/02/2025 18:10

Unless she's using lots and lots of makeup then a basic micellar water/ face wash is all that's needed.

But you should be helping and encouraging her to remove make up to protect her skin

Completelyjo · 04/02/2025 18:10

AllIWannaDoo · 04/02/2025 18:08

Oh for goodness sake. Are you talking about eye make up remover? Because soap will remove make up perfectly well. I can't believe this is even a question.

It really won’t. A bar of soap really shouldn’t be coming anywhere near someone’s face.

MereDintofPandiculation · 04/02/2025 18:12

cestlavielife · 04/02/2025 16:41

Give a sufficient budget allowance and they buy all their own toiletries
Gets them budgeting

Agree with this.

But in practical terms, you don't want her skimping on cleanser, so it would be worth buying it.

Barrenfieldoffucks · 04/02/2025 18:12

Oh and deodorant and her choice of sanitary products etc.

aCatCalledFawkes · 04/02/2025 18:15

Well not specifically makeup remover but cleanser that removes grime, sunscreen etc as well as make up to clean there skin absolutely. My daughter uses it twice daily including when she isn't wearing make up as part of her skincare routine.

sprigatito · 04/02/2025 18:16

@Completelyjo why not? People have been washing with soap for centuries.

IcyHare · 04/02/2025 18:18

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Fairyvocals · 04/02/2025 18:18

Seriously?

MerryTealHedgehog · 04/02/2025 18:19

Its tight just buy her what she needs.

BreakfastClubBlues · 04/02/2025 18:20

I also bought her a decent razor with a subscription for blades to be delivered

@Barrenfieldoffucks I'd love to know more about this for my DD?

aCatCalledFawkes · 04/02/2025 18:20

sprigatito · 04/02/2025 18:16

@Completelyjo why not? People have been washing with soap for centuries.

That doesn't mean it's a great product to use on your face and I certainly wouldn't give it to a teen who was prone to spots. There are products on the market that a designed to be used on your face and really don't cost a lot either.

21ZIGGY · 04/02/2025 18:22

Micellar water is trash. Get an oil based cleanser as a first cleanse then she can use the face wash you already buy as a second cleanse

Onelifeonly · 04/02/2025 18:23

I buy it for myself anyway, but my make up loving dd has always bought her own versions. I'd say it is no big deal either way. If you don't use it, let your dc get their own.

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 04/02/2025 18:23

I buy my teen son’s skincare, so it’s targeted for his hormonal spot prone skin.

I’d encourage a daughter wearing make up to get into double cleansing in the evening - a cleanser that’s heavy duty that will remove make up and then something lighter for a second cleanse and in the morning. Doesn’t have to be expensive though. I’d consider that toiletries that I would provide.

Anxioustealady · 04/02/2025 18:23

Why have children if you're going to resent providing them with what they need? Yes you should buy toiletries for children.

Person1234 · 04/02/2025 18:26

The real question is: why does her request bother you so much?

Dollshousedolly · 04/02/2025 18:27

Just buy the make up remover, between this and your other thread, I’m guessing you don’t like your daughter very much.

Hdjdb42 · 04/02/2025 18:29

I buy my teenagers baby wipes to remove make up with. I buy them face wash, toner and moisturiser. They have less spots now, because of the good skincare routine.

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 04/02/2025 18:31

so you are happy to let them clean their hair clean their bodies but not their faces if they wear make up ?
odd.

boulevardofbrokendreamss · 04/02/2025 18:31

Yes. Why wouldn't you? I'm not buying the drunk elephant cleanser but normal make up remover yes

Barrenfieldoffucks · 04/02/2025 18:32

BreakfastClubBlues · 04/02/2025 18:20

I also bought her a decent razor with a subscription for blades to be delivered

@Barrenfieldoffucks I'd love to know more about this for my DD?

We have this one:

https://www.harrys.com/lpg/gb-bsem-1?utm_source=google-b&utm_medium=sem&utm_campaign=gbnd-harrys-exact-23&gad_source=1 at the moment.

Though we have used the Dollar Shave Club as well, I'm sure there others. You get a decent handle etc in the starter pack, then set how often you want blades. I didn't really feel I could talk to my (very lovely) mum about stuff like this as I was very private, and my daughter is similar. So when she asked about leg shaving, I just said she was welcome to do what she wanted with her legs etc, but to use decent blades and lubrication as the first time I ever tried with no input I flipping dry shaved my legs with a cheap Bic and it was horrendous 😂 And she seems to have taken it on board.

I keep one of the packs of blades for me when they arrive and use the same handle as her with my own blade, on the rare occasion I shave 😬😬😂

Harry's - Quality Men’s Shaving Products. Fair Prices. Simple.

We knew there had to be a way to get a quality razor without overpaying for it. That's why we created Harry's as a return to the essential: a great shave at a fair price.

https://www.harrys.com/lpg/gb-bsem-1?gad_source=1

lionsleepstonight · 04/02/2025 18:34

Yes, all toiletries and chocolate are things that are nice to provide.

Are you coming to terms with what a teenager needs these days. I appreciate you may have been brought up without them, however both can be bought cheaply if cost is an issue.

What's the story?