Do your kids give you a birthday card?

[Anon4778]

I turned 47 yesterday. My husband booked a meal at a local pub last night so it wasn’t forgotten or anything.

I am feeling really hurt and emotional that neither he or either of my kids gave me a birthday card or anything yesterday morning. Am I being ridiculous?

Older daughter 17 baked a cake the day before but then didn’t even wish me happy birthday in the morning - she did say it when I collected her from work mid afternoon but the cake just sort of sat there with a dishcloth over it and was never actually given. Younger daughter 10 went to the shop and got me a notepad and some chocolate off her own bat after school which was really thoughtful
of her.

I organise birthday cards / gifts for everyone else, I want them all to know they’re loved and special on their birthdays. I organise Christmas and put a lot of effort and thought into that too. I’m just feeling really hurt that none of them bothered.

To make matters worse I’ve said I feel hurt by all this, and now my husband and older daughter are basically angry with me for being upset.

No, I don't care about cards and never give out them myself, switched to smartshow 3d birthday videos years ago instead. Also it seems like your children did a lot anyway, why are you salty about not getting a card? It's not like you got no birthday celebration-

Dp has never got me a card but occasionally has bought a card from dc, they did do things for your bday so you wasn't forgotten.

Even myself I don't send cards to people just a text with a bday image but I do send my parents a card

Sorry I don’t understand any adult making such a fuss over a birthday card. You’ve had a cake and a meal out. Be grateful.

Yes. I would feel the same way as you about this.
It's a bit like manners isn't it?
Not absolutely necessary but nice behavior that keeps everyone feeling good about the situation. A standard.

I don't get why it's the kids mentioned in the title when you have a DH. Mine are 9 and 15 so only slightly younger then yours, and yes I always have cards from them but most of the time that's because DH has made sure he gets one with / for them, and vice versa on his birthday. I also get a card and gift from dh, which unless I've misunderstood you didn't. And usually a gift will also be 'from the kids' but I know he's usually brought it. They do sometimes make the card themselves - dd15 is good at that, but not always. They are not earning yet so I don't expect them to spend the quite low pocket money I give them on me, not would I expect the 9 year old to go shopping. The 15 year old could, but I guess it's habit now the other parent sorts it out or at least discusses it with them. Why would he suddenly stop after 15 years?

So if you didn't get given anything on the morning of your birthday, that's on DH to me. Ditto if no one lit candles on a cake and presented it to you.

The not actually saying happy birthday bit is off (more so for the older one) but they did both recognise your birthday on other ways. I think it's lovely one made a cake and one went to the shop and chose you something.

So I'm saying you are not unreasonable to be a bit disappointed no one gave you a card or says happy birthday when you woke up, or that if I understand properly the only gifts you got were what a 10 year old could buy in the local shop (!), but it's DH I would be blaming for that, not the kids.