To think they call us Karen because they fear us

[InformEducateEntertain]

I absolutely hate the term Karen. It's pejorative and deeply unpleasant.

Middle aged women (of whom I am one and to whom the term is most generally applied) are bloody amazing. Putting us down for our don't give a f**k badass attitude and willingness to fight back strikes me as lazy categorisation.

I'd go as far to say that those who use it are scared by the knowledge that looking the menopause in the eye has given us the courage to have a voice at last.

AIBU?

That's EXACTLY what the term Karen is intended to achieve.

Add 'cat lady' to the list.

Mad cat lady.

Definitely

I hate the term “Karen”, because it’s derogatory, and also doesn’t differentiate between people who are actually being offensive (gratuitous rudeness to shop staff for example), and women who are perfectly reasonably standing up for their rights (eg confronting someone who pushes in front of them in a queue).

Everyone claiming this is just about targeting all women who express an opinion - why do you think it doesn’t generally get used to describe women of colour?

This is not an answer.

You have not explained why BAME or people of colour is offensive or problematic or how Global majority solves that problem or offence.

Creating ever new arbitrary name changes, and making sneering put downs a @Leafy74 did when people use the now apparently 'old terms' does not win people over to the anti-racist cause.

People are usually happy to adopt changes that make sense. But you push people away with changes that are not given reasonable justification and seem like arbitrary continual changing of goalposts.

wot

I for one am completely fed up with it, because it's my name! and apart from that, its is a way to patronise and insult women of a certain age.

I think it's both.
Best response is 'Fuck 'em'

My original question was about the WHY? not the HOW? But this has been very informative.

For those of you scared of being accused of being a Karen - don't be. It reflects far worse on the user than the target.

I am doing some work for a gay male couple at the moment. They are really nice in person, but keep being incredibly nitpickety about things I can't change that are industry wide known issues. They will send multiple, long emails and I'm starting to think they believe they are the only ones who can see the issues and that they think they need to singlehandedly point them out and be 'changemakers'. They keep referring to themselves in a rueful, oh look at us kind of way as 'karens' and it annoys me because actually they are just displaying quite bog standard negative male pattern traits - disagreeable, unwilling to compromise, over explaining as though I'm a child, patronising etc. It's def some kind of misogyny.

Do we not have the term cunt then?

Great minds 😁

Because inciting racial hatred is, rightly, a crime. But anyone can say what they like about women.

I agree. I’m Middle Aged, and never been called a Karen- because I don’t behave like one

It's the same misogynistic bullshit as 'Rachel from accounts', the 80s Sharon and Tracey.

Sadly some women like to try and be part of this misogyny.

Exactly this.

Don't understand the OP trying to pretend it is something else.

Exactly!

I was a waitress for a few months. It was eye opening how absolutely awful so many men are to staff. Men on dates were the worst, clearly they thought it made them look impressive to bully the waitress.

Its definitely not fear.

From my understanding - its a term used for white women that attempt to bully people into submission.

It’s not about being assertive or staying your preferences.

E.g. Amy Cooper who called the police on the black man bird watching…I mean how dare he? 🙄

Or Michelle Bishop who called the police on Mike Jenkins because she didn’t believe he owned such an expensive property…

This is what people were initially calling out…

Then as if on cue ..when the behaviour is called by the public/police - the tears start flowing!

I find on social media it seems to be younger women using that insult to older women more than men, I’ve not done any survey but that’s my observation

Gammons. Hope that helps

Yep so true! And the sexual harassment. I used to hate having both hands full as it gave men the opportunity to pat my bum without me being able to slap their hands away.

"I wouldn’t use Karen for someone complaining about something valid.

I would use Karen for someone:

• Calling someone out for not being “disabled” enough to use a parking space
• Saying they don’t want a non-white person to serve them
• Calling a company about their adult child and raging / complaining when they say they can’t talk to them due to data protection
• Trying to use an expired coupon and kicking off when it doesn’t work
• Having a set seat in a cafe and kicking off if someone sits there.

etc etc. all real examples!

To me ‘Karen’ means someone who is privileged and not being used to being told “no” kicking off about it. Often a power dynamic/issue of race/class etc."

@Peaceandquietandacuppa so if you were to see a man doing any of those things or a man who is privileged and not used to hear the word "no" and using his power and status to kick off would you would call him a Karen? Or is there a man's name that captures the same behaviour from men?

What's interesting about your examples is that they are very much about behaviour in shops/supermarkets where there tend to be more women so more incidents of bad mannered, demanding or rude customers who happen to be female is more likely but that doesn't mean the behaviour is more likely to come from women generally. So why must a female first name be attached to any behaviour? I think the world just accepts that aggression and demandingness is more acceptable from men.