Blusher drama

[EndlessTreadmill]

I have 2DD aged 11 and 9.
The 11 year old, like many girls her age is into the whole skincare thing (no judgement please, I don't encourage it but do let her have a few products). She used some of her pocket money to buy a Pixi blusher thing (£20 I think) . It comes in a stick like a deodorant and you turn the bottom to make it come out of the top, like a lipsick basically. It was a prized possession, and she has had it about 2-3 weeks.
Then this weekend the girls were together in DD11 's bedroom, DD11 went to take a shower and DD9 used the blusher. Unfortunately, she must have used it a little bit less carefully than DD11, and when DD11 went to use it, she saw some slight sort of creases in the top of the product, and a few small smudges on the side of it and she now says it is 'bumpy' and uneven and terrible to use.

Now honestly the 'damage' is very very minor, I wouldn't even have noticed it, the product is still almost new, probably looks like it would for most people who used it normally for a couple of months. However, DD11 is completely hysterical about it, and just cannot get over it.
DD9 is upset, and has promised never to touch her sister's things again, b is a good girl and kind to her sister (who bosses her about), and definitely did not trash the blusher - curiosity got the better of her and she just tried it once. So there is no point in punishing her etc, it won't make the blusher like new again.

Part of me is telling her to just get a grip. I have also said I will buy her another one when this one is finished, but she needs to finish it as it's just a complete waste to not use an expensive product which is virtually new and totally usable (neither I nor DD9 wear blusher!).

On the other hand, she says it was her treat, bought with her own money, and now she has no pleasure in using it etc. And that it will take about 5 years to use up, so the offer to replace when it's used is pointless, she is just going to stop using it.

I can't work out if I am pandering to a spoilt child by replacing it, or if this is the sort of incident which she will still be using as an example of childhood unfairness in 20 years time.

YABU replace the blusher now
YANBU tell her to get a grip and suck it up

The younger sister may be a good girl and kind to her sister but waiting until the older sister was out of the room shows she knows she shouldn't have used the blusher. Why not just ask "can I try it?". I wouldn't take the money from the younger sister's pocket money but she does need to understand that this was an unkind act, a learning curve.

And replace the blusher.

And because her mum cares so little about it, she's not even punished the younger sister. That would have me raging!

Right. She got straight in there to make sure everyone knew she thinks there's no point in punishing the child who did the wrong thing. Mind made up, game set and match.

YANBU, as others say, she can blend it and its her choice if she no longer chooses to use the still usable make-up, it will be no more of a waste than buying a replacement

I am glad you decided to buy your older daughter the blusher, it should have been an immediate reaction, and I hope you will nip your favouritism in the bud before it gets any worse.

But her a new one and you keep the other one Op! Win, a nice new- ish blusher for you! @EndlessTreadmill

I can assure you that some extremely bad things did happen to me as a child, but they're not relevant to this thread and none of your fucking business, thanks.

I loved buying make up as a pre teen hundreds of years ago in the 80s, I also enjoyed playing with my dolls house so it didn't spoil my childhood.

I do think it's a shame that pre teens/teens are influenced to buy the expensive stuff when there are so many great cheap brands available these days, but that's by the by.

I would say to DD11 that you will either buy her a new one, or she can have £10 towards her next make up purchase and make that her decision. That way you are acknowledging how important it is to her, but also getting her to have a sense of perspective about how much damage was actually done to the product.

I don't know how much pocket money DD8 gets, but I would take it off her for one week to contribute towards the cost of DD11 replacement or funds.

As some people have said, it's not really about the blusher and DD11 needs to know her possessions and clothing are safe and her own.