To think that wolf whistling wasn't such a bad thing?

[NovemberMorn]

Joanna Lumley has just given an interview in which she says..."I never minded wolf whistling, I always thought it was tremendous".

She also said... "I think we were a little bit tougher then. Somebody put their hand on your leg, you didn’t feel affronted and report it. You’d give them a slap.”

Do you think she is right?

I think this thread is going round in circles. Some is us didn't mind being wolf whistled at. Some of us did. And that's that.

I’m not sure why any of us care what Joanna Lumley thinks anyway. She’s not someone whose opinion I usually take notice of!

This has got to be a wind up!

So scared and yet relationships continue and the world keeps turning. Even though the poor little menz can’t will whistle anymore.

In stitches? WTAF. A woman was groped and you all laughed because she put him in his place. Did you all carry on jovially eating, did he stay and laugh with you all, did she move places?

And for the record, a predatory man doesn't just stop because a woman threatens to break his fingers. Jesus wept!

God I loved being a young woman in the 80s, great fun times, carefree, I am glad I'm not a young woman in todays times to be honest, sorry you didn't enjoy your youth xx

How dare they laugh, the cheek of them, heres a thought, it happened, she dealt with it, they all laughed and all moved on wirh their life, imagine!!!

Fuck I hated it so so so so so so much. I would go out of my way to try to avoid men on scaffolding, men in groups, I would wear headphones and try to pretend not to hear their creepy, awful comments. I hated it SO MUCH. It made me angry, scared and disgusted, not once ever did I feel in any way pleased or happy to have some weirdo making noises at me, or calling to me.

I was over the moon when I learned to drive in my mid 20s and got a car and could avoid at least some of the creepy, greasy male comments.

And he was free to be predatory to numerous other women over the course of his lifetime! As long as they all laughed though.

Laughing away rape culture isn't the answer. It's not funny

There is literally no point in what you have said. A school child going to school being groped between the legs (never mind, she's done alright) and you can't see the connection between that and men objectifying women in other ways. I hope you don't have daughters. Or sons for that matter.

Yep. No idea how anybody thinks an unknown creepy weirdo making noises at you is enjoyable.

But we aren't saying that it should be brought back. Nor are we invalidating what other people suffered. Being groped as a 13 year old is a crime. They are not the same thing at all.

There is a certain irony however that those who saw it as harmless fun are made to feel that they should NOT have those memories, even though they were not there on that sunny morning in June 1994 , walking past Moorgate station. And actually this is extremely frightening. I feel quite "upset" by the viciousness of the comments on here for daring to have an opinion/memory/belief of a certain point in my life. The verbal bullying of those who dare to have an experience which is outside the "party line", makes a builder's wolf whistle from the top of some scaffolding pale into insignificance.

If we are no longer allowed to have independent thought, then yes, I'd like to go back in time!!

Nope, saying that I have no idea how anyone could enjoy a creepy weirdo making nosies at them doesn't in any way manner shape or form say or imply that people don't have the right to enjoy creepy weirdos making noises at them.

Haven't seen anyone verbally bullying anyone for enoying being predated on by creepy weirdos - although I did see people standing up to people minimising frightening, sleazy behaviour by men.

And if you're claiming to be frightened and upset by women disagreeing with you in comment sections, perhaps the internet is not for you.

Are you saying it was that woman's responsibility to deal with that man in such a way that he would never, ever dare to do that to anyone again? Because it sounds like that's what you're suggesting...
The shitness of men is not my responsibility. I'll call it out and deal with it how and when I see fit. But I won't take offence where I don't feel offended. This lady sounds like she dealt with it brilliantly in my opinion. What's wrong with the picture in yours?

No, that is quite obviously not what I’m saying. Women are never responsible for men’s behaviour, which is what I’ve been saying throughout this thread.
I was calling out the ridiculousness of thinking it was a funny anecdote.

Because it made you laugh, back in the day!

Honestly, this is tedious at this point.

Oh, you're ok with it? Good for you.

Many women and girls aren't ok with it. Should they be forced to endure it because you derive your self-esteem from random men yelling at you in the street?

I don't particularly care if certain women think it's flattering or makes them feel good-fine. I think it's odd, but it's not my circus, not my monkeys.

I do care if a prominent public figure uses their platform to say that women and girls should just toughen up because she thinks it's no big deal. Good for JL, I guess, who has never been in the position of having to endure a man's sexual harassment or face losing her job that she depends on to feed her kids.

It's spectacularly out of touch.

As far as "women need to toughen up," why is it always women that need to change to accommodate men's poor behaviour? Why can't the men simply choose to not exhibit such nasty behaviour in the first place?

In the past, women didn't deal with it so much as put up with it. There's a huge difference between women getting on because that's just how things are and actually enjoying it.

Women, even to this day, are fed the lie that it's a compliment. If they don't like it, they're being too sensitive and behaving like one of those women.

So, because men are no longer able to sexually harass women and make them feel uncomfortable without repercussion, they now no longer feel comfortable looking at women? Good. I wouldn't want those type of men looking at women or feeling comfortable anywhere, to be honest.

Good, decent men have no desire to wolf whistle or cat call women. Only the men who view women as their inferior and who want to remind women that they they believe they're above them in the pecking order.

It might have made "you" laugh. It made me cringe with embarrassment and disgust.

She's now at the top of a very prestigious profession, worth a fortune. You needed that kind of self-worth and bravery to get on in those days

So a young girl who didn't have the confidence to call out sexual assault has no self worth? WTF...... this thread is eye opening and not in a good way

I didn't mind it at one time, then I got a bit older and realised how disgusting it was that it was normal for men to whistle at under age girls in their school uniform. I learnt of the sexual threat men posed to women and girls and started to find it intimidating rather than complementary.
Naive 14 year old me took it as a complement, adult me finds it vile and is happy my children are growing up I'm a generation where sexual assault and intimidation isn't acceptable.

I looked up the interview to see more of the context: It's interesting that she says she's not one for self reflection and that she values politeness. Alternating between that and slapping seems to have been her response:

"It is, she says, a very different age in so many ways. In “the olden days – I like the word ‘olden’,” she says, no more than everybody, she was the object of sexist behaviour.
“People would go, ‘Oh, you’re lovely, darling’. But I never minded people wolf-whistling. I always thought that was tremendous. You’d go – mock simper – ‘Oh, thank you so much, that’s lovely’. Nobody was ever insulted by that. But I think we were a little bit tougher then. Somebody put their hand on your leg, you didn’t feel affronted and report it. You’d give them a slap.
“And people now say, oh, you don’t understand. Well, we do understand because there were Harvey Weinsteins aplenty. I think there still are, and they’re absolutely everywhere. Office wolves, or whatever you want to call them.” She laughs. Such an archaic expression.
People <a class="break-all" href="https://archive.ph/o/ceetl/www.telegraph.co.uk/politics/2025/01/24/civil-servants-strike-return-to-office/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">working from home has solved that problem. “Bless them… I think that sounds nicer than it actually is. You’d almost rather an office wolf because then at least you can say to Muriel who’s in accounts, isn’t he dreadful? At least you have a bit of conversation.”

Here is a link to the archived article: archive.ph/ceetl#selection-3299.0-3336.0

Wow.
Really?

Yep, that school uniform I wore, and those jeans and jumpers I dressed in most days showed the creepy sleazebags I was asking for it. Serves me right, really.

No she's completely wrong and minimising sexual assault.

Indeed.