To think that wolf whistling wasn't such a bad thing?

[NovemberMorn]

Joanna Lumley has just given an interview in which she says..."I never minded wolf whistling, I always thought it was tremendous".

She also said... "I think we were a little bit tougher then. Somebody put their hand on your leg, you didn’t feel affronted and report it. You’d give them a slap.”

Do you think she is right?

Sexual attraction to children = paedophile

The fact that women do know how to handle themselves and the fact they don't want to be wolf whistled at are not mutually exclusive.

Do you honestly think my DD's haven't been harassed by middle aged men and would be firmly in the camp ' don't want wolf whistles' and 'I know how to handle myself'

You come across with absolutely male entitlement and male understanding and that Mr Morn is the crux of this issue.

@NovemberMorn

does this women pass your ridiculous assumptions about women handling themsleves.

https://metro.co.uk/video/man-climbs-train-tracks-harass-lone-woman-london-station-3043629/

To whathaveiforgotten,
Yes, especially if the person was young.
Someone asked at what age I would have thought it would be acceptable, obviously for some it would never have been acceptable, and I also accept that.

My stance is, back in the day, it was a regular occurrence, it just didn't bother me, or any other girl/woman I knew, it was on a par with someone saying"All right Love" or "morning darling" as they passed....maybe it was a northern thing too....but I personally never felt threatened by it.

As has been said...women and girls handled themselves back then. Only because they knew nobody else cared a damn. That it was acceptable to "try it on" with any female you came across. If a man was sexually harassing his secretaries, the solution was to provide him with older women, not to take it up with the man - how can that be right? The older men who have been outed as serial abusers of women all began their "careers" when "women could handle themselves".

but I personally never felt threatened by it. That's great. You weren't threatened by it. But it was part of a culture that allowed sexual harrassment and abuse, and a lot of women weren't just threatened but actually harmed. But you were OK.

Me me me can't think beyond me, myself and I

When you say yes, which post are you answering?

Sorry I missed my name being tagged @NovemberMorn

I'm glad you now understand that it was wrong to say that a wolf whistle never harmed anyone. Unsure why you said it in the first place if you do apparently understand that it could harm people but better late than never.

I agree OP. It was just a bit of flirtatious fun and they were usually on a roof in broad daylight so never threatening!
Totally different from actual sexual harassment.

Everyone is looking to be offended nowadays but I’m not sure they’re any happier.

I'm old now, but when I was young I enjoyed it. Made me feel powerful. Never once have I felt threatened by a wolf whistle or cat call. I've generally found the quiet, watchful ones to be more threatening.
Seems I'm in a minority for this. So be it. I don't miss it.
But I do think this constant victimization of ourselves in general makes us believe we are less powerful.
I don't have any problems with self-esteem. I dealt with a few twats in my time, but still believe most men are fundamentally good people just like most women. Humans sometimes find themselves attracted to other humans and it's just a fact of life, wolf whistling always just seemed a part of that to me.
I still feel powerful now, just not through my looks or my sexuality.

Do you think it’s just ‘flirtatious fun’ when it’s aimed at underage girls?

Oh and I was offended by it back then, nothing to do with ‘nowadays’.

I'd advise any women who is the victim of sexual assault - because that's we're talking about - to report it to the police.

You see, a slap across the face may stop one man in one moment. Although frankly in my experience most men, whilst embarrassed, would ultimately just laugh it off or possibly turn nasty. The only way women will ever be able to stop being treated as pieces of meat and male property is to stop it at its roots. Obviously educating boys is one vital way to achieve this but the best way is to make it completely unacceptable so that employers in all sectors dismiss anyone sexually harrassing women and friends/acquaintances make them social pariahs.

It was acceptable at one time for circus animals to be whipped, humiliated and made to perform. People used to go and watch it with their children - and this wasn't that long ago. Now we are enlightened and horrified by such things but only because of action through petition and legislation and a multitude of people calling it out as very, very wrong. Not because one brave soul slapped the lion tamer around the face.

Bollocks. It has never been about "flirtatious fun". Try saying something back and then see what happens. Soon stops being "flirtatious fun" when you make it clear that you don't like it.

I actually think young women are MORE able to handle themselves now because they are more likely to be unaccepting of male predatory behaviour and report it.

That is how to handle the situation well and also protects other women in the future from repeat offenders.

I wonder what your views are on the horrendous violence that happens to women in this modern world.
It seems to me that both online and off, women are disrespected, abused, and generally seen as 'less', than they ever were 20 or 30 years ago.
Wolf whistling was very mild in comparison.

No. It was more normal I guess in her time and her profession, but it shouldn't have been then and certainly not now. Women shouldn't have to 'slap them away' or put up with feeling embarrassed.
It's interesting my DD is at uni and she said in a group at lunch one of the boys was talking about women's rights to abortion. A couple of the girls were putting their opinions out but he was discounting them and not really listening - so while he thought he was being pro women he was actually demonstrating the opposite. Unfortunately it still seems to be the case that men can voice their opinions (including wolf whistling or touching) and if women object they are either being unreasonable or ignored and should be flattered!

@NovemberMorn

Just for the record, I slapped a guy who touched me in a bar, he swiftly put his hand up my skirt on the inside of my leg to my groin. He retaliated and it did not end well for me.

It is ridiculous to think that a woman slapping a guy for assaulting her through inappropriate touching is the right thing to do. I think you've watched too many 1950's movies where once she slaps him, he feels his cheek and backs down.

Back in the real world it is a risky strategy.

Is your advice to those women to 'handle themselves' as well?

This thread, it's goady, light-the-blue-touchpaper stuff and so very often covered. Why did you post it given that you've now switched to horrendous violence to women? Odd.

Did you alert any of the staff? Because that sort of behaviour in a public place is simply not acceptable, either now or back in JL's time.

I did "look after myself" and boy did some of the cowards shit themselves when I did. I didn't get the vapours 🙄 either. I got the fucking rage.

Is the point beyond you that I shouldn't have had to find strategies to navigate bad male behavior and sexual harrasment on the street. All I should have to do in the street is go about my day, unaccosted and uncommented on.

It seems to me that both online and off, women are disrespected, abused, and generally seen as 'less', than they ever were 20 or 30 years ago.
Wolf whistling was very mild in comparison.

It wasn't just wolf whistling 20 or 30 years ago, was it? That was just one aspect of a complete dismissal of women in all spheres. When I was a young woman, there were nude girlie calendars in garages, men refusing to take information from a women and asking to speak to her manager, who they assumed was male, with good reason, because women had a hard time getting into senior positions.. Women afraid to report rape because they knew that if they were dressed attractively, if they were walking home at night rather than taking a taxi, they'd be judged as having brought it on themselves. Remember the Yorkshire Ripper?

Is the point beyond you that I shouldn't have had to find strategies to navigate bad male behavior and sexual harrasment on the street. All I should have to do in the street is go about my day, unaccosted and uncommented on. Well said!

It's a conversation, it has moved on to different levels of abuse....do keep up