I'm not sure if this is the right thread for this post, and it will be a long one, but it is a story that I have wanted to tell for most of my life, so here goes...
I was circumcised when I was 50 for medical reasons (more on that later) but I have suffered with problems with my penis all my life, as will become clear.
Among my earliest memories is being taken to see the doctor in the early 60s when I was about 3. He examined my penis and pulled my foreskin back as part of the examination This was very painful as I don't think it had ever been done before. I remember my mother and the doc. talking for what seemed like for ever before we left, and I am convinced that they were in a discussion about whether I needed circumcising or not. I don't know if my mother was arguing for it and the doc. dissuading her, or the doctor was recommending it on the basis of his examination and my mother was resisting ( I suspect it was the former - knowing my mother she would have taken the doctor's advice). Anyway, I remained uncircumcised.
As I grew up I became more and more aware of my penis (as boys do) and was always troubled by it. Whenever I pulled my foreskin back the glans was messy with smegma and try as I might I could not keep it clean. It was also incredibly sensitive and intolerant of any sort of touch, making it too painful to wash properly even in the bath. One of the things I noticed when I was about 10 was that many of the boys at school had a different sort of penis to me (ie they were circumcised) - I think the division in those days was about 50/50. It occurred to me that they could not have the same problem as me.
Anyway, as I grew older the problem of keeping clean improved but the hyper-sensitivity did not, making adolescent masturbation painful unless I kept the glans artificially wet. I should add that although I devoutly wished that the situation would improve I was always too shy to take my problem to a doctor, but I always carried the notion in the back of my mind that circumcision may be an answer. When I started dating I was always fearful of the pain that might be involved in sexual contact and with the few girlfriends that I had a full relationship with I had to steer them away from over-enthusiastic endeavours with my penis, which surprised (and disappointed) some of them (for instance I could not tolerate oral). I am sure that my shyness over my problems with my penis severely limited my ability to date and enjoy relationships with girls.
When I was in my late forties I noticed a rash on my glans (painless, but very visible and ugly) which I eventually took to my GP, who I knew well. He initially thought it was a fungal infection, but it failed to respond to treatment. He referred me to a dermatologist who diagnosed Zoon's Balanitis and started treatment with steroid creams. I suggested circumcision as almost all medical websites pointed to that being the only sure solution, but he insisted that the creams had a very good chance of working. After a year it was no better so he reluctantly referred my to a urologist who having examined me (v. painful!) said " I wish you had been sent to me a year ago". Apparently the scarring on my foreskin was now very bad. He said he would do the best he could for me and the hospital appointment was made (all this was private on insurance, so there was little delay). Given the state my penis was in he made a very good job, but the skin is fused to the rim of the glans on the left side whereas the scar line sits behind it on the right as it should, giving it an uneven appearance. Sorry it this is too much information (!), but I feel it is relevant to the story.
There was very little pain following the operation, but in the early days after the psychological shock of realising that the protective covering of the glans had gone when all my life I had depended on it to keep me from agony took some getting over. It took more than 6 weeks to heal and settle down, but quite suddenly it all seemed to resolve itself; my glans had become mercifully much less sensitive (to the point where dry touch is pleasurable not agony). The difference in not just my sex life but life in general is massive.
I think that my story raises several important points about the circumcision debate in general - though clearly this is about circumcision for medical reasons and has no bearing on the argument surrounding religious and cultural practice.
I often wonder how different my life would have been if the outcome of that fateful visit to the doctor had gone the other way; about if I had not been so shy and had gone to the doctor as a young man; even about if one of my girlfriends had insisted that something was wrong and had pushed me to get the operation done?
The moral (if that is what it is) is that circumcision is not always wrong even when it is not strongly indicated; that mothers sometimes have an incredibly difficult task in making the right decision; and then when there is a clear indication that your son needs to be circumcised don't be frightened of being bold.
I hope I haven't bored you and thank you for reading my story.