The brainlessness of an English Tutor. Fuming

[crazymomma93]

Long time lurker, please bear with me.
My DD12 has been having some issues with her reading book. It has been making her feel uncomfortable, from the Genre and style of writing. So I have looked into it, got a jist of the book, she has pointed out some bits that made her uneasy and I looked up the age rating which was 14+. Now typically if you knew me, you would know I am not "that Mom" but I emailed her Form Tutor to ask if there was an alternative. Tutor emailed back after talking to English dept and DD dosn't need to read the book any longer, she can bring in her own. No problem. My DD has just told me she spoke with her own English Tutor, the day before I sent the email to tell her Form Tutor. After listening to DD, English Tutor responds "it's just words"
ITS JUST WORDS? Sorry is that not pretty much the Tutors whole career, teaching English?
I need calming because I am close to emailing said teacher calling her a c**t, because, you know "it's just words". See how her feelings are when she reads something that makes her uncomfortable.
My DD turned to her to ask because the book was making her uneasy and that is the response. What about children who get verbally bullied? Where is this Womans morals. AIBU?

I literally don't understand this whole thread. Why does a 12 year old think they need permission to return a library book? I'm not sure anyone needs to be called a c word over this....

Yes they do

I wouldn’t change the story for my DC if whole class were studying it. Not wrong to question the choice /raise a concern. Might influence future decisions for the subject content.

My secondary school English texts in the 1990s
To Kill A Mockingbird
Of mice and men
Cider with Rosie
Empty world

All had dark sides and sexual content. I enjoyed them all (except cider with Rosie, for which I found the text dull and slow)

My DC texts have included hard hitting storylines (A monster calls, Run Rebel) though these had less sexual content than the texts of my day.

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In my experience, the content of books aimed at children aged 9-12 is much more strictly policed by publishers etc than it was in the past, although naturally there will always be themes that individual children might find upsetting for their own good reasons. For school librarians and parents, the YA category is too wide. Perhaps a Young Teen category (13-15) would be helpful for parents/librarians but might not be so appealing to teens!

It's a long time since I read Zola and I was in my early 20s, not teens. My recollection is that the novels in Les Rougon-Macquart cycle are upsetting. I don't think they are suitable for young teens.

I am close to emailing said teacher calling her a ct, because, you know "it's just words". See how her feelings are when she reads something that makes her uncomfortable.
My DD turned to her to ask because the book was making her uneasy and that is the response. What about children who get verbally bullied? Where is this Womans morals

These aren’t comparable. With emails and bullying, the words are directly attacking another persons to whom they are addressed. This book isn’t specifically targeting your DD.

If for some reason the subject of the book is particularly triggering to DD and she really feels she can’t continue reading it, then I guess she should be allowed to stop. But I don’t blame the teacher for pushing back on this a bit, books that challenge us can often be the most rewarding to read. Plus on a practical level, how will your DD benefit from her lessons and be involved in the class discussion if she’s read a different book to everyone else?

I doubt very much that that was all that was said to your child. Context is everything.

Surely you could just email the tutor, preferably without the childish slurs, and ask her exactly how that conversation went?

Why are you so quick to go full fury?

My son read it for GCSE and also Animal Farm. I can’t bring myself to read them.

Perhaps "On the Beach" by Nevil Shute? I don't remember a rape but I was 14 when we had to read it (45 years ago) so the memory isn't quite there.

Is it on the curriculum, or is it a reading book set to your DD ? Wondering why the fuck the McFly guy would be in the curriculum...

What is it about the book that made her uncomfortable?

Was it "Z for Zachariah"? That's post-nuclear war and there's an attempted sexual assault in it.

I am close to emailing said teacher calling her a ct,

Were I still teaching then my reply would be Takes one to know one.
Parents need to concentrate on their children's well-being instead of wasting teachers' time with petty emails. They should not have a teacher's email at all, if they have a complaint then go through the proper channels, the Head.

Most of the books everyone’s mentioning I have read and loved. All the nuclear fall out and sci-fi ones, just excellent as they make you stop and think. As for burning the books in Fahrenheit 451 that’s what we all want to avoid as books are wonderous.

And as for history and the holocaust of course we need to read and see those images as teens to make us understand what happened and for it to never happen again. I visited the graveyards in France with my school as a teenager, I will never forget all those graves.

IMHO a lot of the banned books everyone should read, especially teens.

as for this one, eve of man, I have never heard of it. I’ve borrowed it as an ebook from the library now and going to read it. I can’t possibly think what could be wrong with it.

i am in my 50s now and without being able to escape to other worlds in books I’d never have got through my childhood.

As an English teacher I wonder whether the discussion was about the age rating. I can imagine saying something like 'films have absolute ratings and you aren't allowed to watch if the age is higher than yours, but books have recommendations, not ratings as it's only words not images, so our own experience and imagination can protect us a bit'. Or similar argument to that effect.

Thanks for this. I have a 13yo avid reader and I was going to move him on as he's at that difficult in between age. Can you give an idea of books or series that are inappropriate for younger readers.
That said, we passed around Forever (Judy blume) at 12, and hid it under our pillows!!

I read Animal Farm. I have no idea why you would be upset by that book.

"James Herbert The rats..."

OMG, that has just brought back so many memories. I remember reading both that book and The Fog when I was about 14 or 15 in the late 1970s.

The other two books you mentioned weren't published until later. Do you mean Rivals by Jilly Cooper? That wasn't even published until 1988.

I wish teachers would realise that calling a parent "that mum" or "that parent" is not the threat they think it is. Indeed, in some contexts - for example parents fighting for provision for their children's learning difficulties, or standing up against bullies - it can become a badge of honour.

This thread is fantastically batshit. The headcanon rewrite of the end of TKAM; the oblique references to half-remembered books which no-one bothers to name but multiple people feel obliged to guess; and best of all, the novel at the centre of it all being written by that bloke from McFly and his wife off the CBeebies Baby Club.

10/10, no notes.

I’ve taught for 35 years and never heard the phrase ‘that mum’ or ‘that parent’ used by teachers. It’s a MN construct.

First of all, it's not only teachers who say this. Secondly, in the case of the OP, badge of of honour hardly applies, not least because they offer partial information that has stunted debate, and for someone who apparently values language, is happy to want call a teacher a cunt on the basis of a conversation they weren't in on.

@Phthia Teachers don't use 'that mum' as a threat. Who on earth would they be threatening? But they might well tell their colleagues to tread carefully around a mum that uses aggressive language, just in case.

Apparently Boxer being taken off to the glue factory is tear-jerker. But yes, it would help if those so upset by a book would be more precise.

My whole class read Animal Farm in Primary School