The brainlessness of an English Tutor. Fuming

[crazymomma93]

Long time lurker, please bear with me.
My DD12 has been having some issues with her reading book. It has been making her feel uncomfortable, from the Genre and style of writing. So I have looked into it, got a jist of the book, she has pointed out some bits that made her uneasy and I looked up the age rating which was 14+. Now typically if you knew me, you would know I am not "that Mom" but I emailed her Form Tutor to ask if there was an alternative. Tutor emailed back after talking to English dept and DD dosn't need to read the book any longer, she can bring in her own. No problem. My DD has just told me she spoke with her own English Tutor, the day before I sent the email to tell her Form Tutor. After listening to DD, English Tutor responds "it's just words"
ITS JUST WORDS? Sorry is that not pretty much the Tutors whole career, teaching English?
I need calming because I am close to emailing said teacher calling her a c**t, because, you know "it's just words". See how her feelings are when she reads something that makes her uncomfortable.
My DD turned to her to ask because the book was making her uneasy and that is the response. What about children who get verbally bullied? Where is this Womans morals. AIBU?

While I openly confess having never read any of the Harry Potter books, as I understand it they were never considered literary masterpieces. But what they did do is bring thousands of children in to enjoying books.

We should stop the snobbery. If a child starts at the beano and ends up reading war and peace, lets encourage them. *disclaimer...not read war and peace bit hav enjoyed the tales of Dennis and Gnasher.

There’s a LOT of snobbery behind directed the way of this book. I went to see The Creakers at Christmas also written by Tom Fletcher. And it was brilliant and clever.
He’s also one of the few celebrity authors who is spoken highly of by other writers.
There’s different types of celebrity authors, there’s the ones who don’t really do it and it’s ghost written, all the way up to the ones who spend years researching and drafting on labours of love (Mat Osman, bassist of Suede and formerly more famous brother of Richard, is an example here).

Exactly

All this "a book written by 2 celebrities? The horror".... David Walliams had a huge number of books out, considered at least at one point as a modern day Roald Dahl (and some think this is wildly exaggerated). Personally think they're OK but they definitely get plenty of children reading and that's positive

We don't all start out reading Emma and Frankenstein and War and Peace...

My vote for the book (if it hadn't already been revealed) is something by Judy Blume.

*disclaimer...not read war and peace bit hav enjoyed the tales of Dennis and Gnasher.

Honestly there's not much difference. Dennis starts with the same letter as Dolokhov. Coincidence? I think not.

'That LGBT stuff' is part of what we in the biz call 'real life'. And literature is there to hold up a mirror to real life and make us think about it. You may want to be an unreconstructed homophone and turn back time to the good ol' 1950s when everyone was in the closet, but you can't. And 'beliefs' and 'morals' are not the same thing at all - for a start, being homophobic means you lack morals.

1. What "biz"
2. That is true, but a parent has the right to dictate what media their child consumes
3. Morality is influenced by beliefs. In a Godless society it doesn't make sense to restrict peoples pleasures. Many of us believe in an objective morality which is from their religious belief. We have a country that is nearly 10% muslim, and we also have a percentage of christians, and those of other faiths that will not allow their kids to be subject to any media that is deemed unsuitable. This is our right to practice our beliefs. In a similar light Gay people have rights under UK law to practice their sexuality, as does sex outside of marriage, and a host of other things that we do not believe in. If we live in a democracy then that means we all have rights to believe and bring our children up as we will.
4. "homophobia means you lack morals" according to who? That is subjective or can you provide me an objective framework for that statement?
5. How do define Homophobia. Being abusive towards those people? or just believing it to be wrong? If I'm against sex before marriage, what label have you got for that?
6. Incest relationships are also part of "real life" does that mean I have to accept that? Also doesn't violate the harm principle if it was done with infertile people. Do you accept that or are you Incestaphobic?
7. Morals are based on beliefs. In my opinion it is better to have objective and solid beliefs than ones that change every decade with the trends of society.

Kind Regards Pointythings

Much Ado about Nothing.
Just words.

@dadsnet780

Re 1: it's a figure of speech.
Re 2: only in the home. Parents do not control the curriculum or decide set books. If you want to do that, you'll have to home educate.
Re 3: Morality which comes from religious belief is not objective. It's based on belief, nothing more.
Re 4: Judging someone because of how they live their life is not for us mortals. Judge not, lest ye be judged, remember?
Re 5: You can of course believe what you want. That's the joy of living in a free country. However, when your beliefs about 'that LGBT stuff' make you think you are allowed to control the state school curriculum, you've crossed a line and you're back to my point 2.
Re 6: I don't actually have a problem with incestuous relationships, as long as there are absolutely no offspring. No harm done in that scenario.
Re 7: I refer you back to point 3. Also, morals absolutely do need to change. Society used to think that slavery was acceptable. Society used to think that raping your wife was legal. Society used to think that women should not vote. Constant reviews of what we do and whether it is still moral is a vital part of maintaining a civilisation.

Thank you for reading,

     Pointy

I have just scrolled through this post - largely to find out the book referred to. I am a retired English teacher and confess that I don't enjoy TBITSP myself. I do understand how it was written and appreciate the storyline (using a similar trope to that used by C.S. Lewis in TLTWATW to illustrate aspects of the concept of sacrifice) does resonate with younger people. I didn't enjoy reading the book myself so understand why another reader might feel unsettled by it. Education does sometimes push you into dark places. I was stunned by the unseen translation in one of my 'O levels' which dealt with the siege of Masada - we all were. I remember us sitting outside after the exam just stunned at the horror of it all. My friends and I were 15 and 16 at the time, it was horrifying. TBITSP is not at all in that league but it is still heart-rending.

I am pretty sure that no-one in the staff room is talking about 'that mom'; parents have concerns, we all know that and any parent may become distressed. My experience is that we listen and consider whether the overall value of the ideas in the book justify its use at that point in the curriculum. Sometimes learning trumps enjoyment - I think it has to. The trick is making sure that isn't always the case. I think the teacher concerned did try to put things right for the child concerned.

FWIW, I hated 'Lord of the Flies' but it taught me something important and changed me, aged 12. I'm glad it did.

Sorry accidently deleted the EOM paragraph. I can also see why the ideas in the EOM text are very difficult for a 12 year old. The lack of autonomy experienced by the main character is relevant to our society (once again using a contrived plot line to explore a concept and illustrate it in a way that an audience can understand simply - just like TBITSP and TLTWATW). I probably wouldn't have chosen it, but it may relate to PSHE in that year group. I think the teacher did address the issue, when it was brought to their attention.

Found the homophobe

Trying to work out what book TBITSP is 🤣

Practise -a verb in your sentence-has an s.

Of all the zillions of books in the world, I'm sure regardless of people's personal opinions on the book etc, they could of, and should of, chosena book within the age appropriate rating. The age rating is there for a reason.

One of my daughters was shown a film at school a few years above her age and it really really upset her and I was cross because I didn't feel it was reasonable to do that without parent consent.

The boy in the striped pyjamas. No idea about TLTWATW though.

Completely agree with you. An American study showed 1 out of 5 Gen Z respondents saying the Holocaust was a myth, and you can see what's happening around the world again.

I'm guessing The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe but this thread has taken a turn!!

if teachers are so delicate that they can't bear to be told that a pupil doesn't like a chosen book, then they aren't up to the job of teaching such pupils. kids in schools deserve proper responses to their thoughts and feelings, and the chance of genuine debate.

It isn't about being delicate though. Our education works with set books, end of. And of course children are allowed to express their feelings about a book - but they can't expect that book to be changed just because they dislike it.

The Lion The Witch And The Wardrobe

You don't have a problem with incestuous relationships? Is this really were we are going?..

I needn't bother to reply to anything else.

Enjoy

So you’d be fine with a child reading Harold Robbins?

You don't have a problem with incestuous relationships? Is this really were we are going?..

As long as they are relationships between two consenting adults and they are making 100% sure that there will be no offspring, there's no harm done. Incestuous relationships can happen by accident, for instance between half siblings who have never known about each other's existence. Pearl clutching and condemnation are not helpful in those eventualities.

You get your moral compass from your religion, hence your mentioning of 'LGBT stuff', which is hugely disrespectful to swathes of people living productive, safe, happy lives in stable families. My moral compas is secular and pragmatic. Fortunately we both live in places where we are free to believe what we believe.