Daughter changing her eye colour?

[begoodorbegone]

I’ve found out my daughter is going to New York to have her eye colour surgically changed. I’m horrified.

I just can’t support this. Aibu? It’s caused a horrific argument and we’re not speaking.

WTF! I’m likely to need cataract surgery at some point…can’t imagine buggering about with your eyes for no good reason. I’m with you OP, what a stupid thing to be doing.
However, she’s an adult and therefore is allowed to make her own stupid decisions…

What the fucking FUCK?! Why would anybody fuck about with their eyes like this? Nooooooo!

This doesn't sound true. I think the OPs daughter might be winding her up.

So disappointed that people in the medical profession believe this is okay to participate in. It’s right up there with the fuckwits that change people into ‘lizards’ etc rather than on-referring them to psych which is who should be dealing with them. It’s a sad world when this is allowed as I believe they should be struck off.

I knew this was a thing when googling an eye disorder- It is very risky and also looks hideous.

The coloured fake Iris often has to be removed and what’s underneath is a mess.

Her own eye colour is probably brown (?) Nothing wrong with brown eyes.

Fake blue or green or violet just looks unnatural.

Oh good grief!
Presumably she is an adult and can pay herself, in which case you can only do a bit of research on the exact procedure she's planning (there seem to be several) then send her links to the research.
I hope she changes her mind.

What the?!..

Must be a wind up, maybe she’ll get some silly coloured lenses as a prank or something

Aside from the unnecessary risk to your vision, if someone has this done, then meets new people who compliment the beautiful or unusual fake eye colour, what do you even say? Pretend it's natural for the rest of your life or explain that it's artificial every time? Maybe it's so obviously unnatural that there's not as much need for explanation.

This can’t be real! You don’t travel TO New York - a place where strep throat can cost a fortnight’s wages to treat and cancer can bankrupt you - for health care. If, heaven forbid, something goes wrong, your daughter could be in debt for life. Of course, they’re her eyes, but what financial protections does she have in place?

Unfortunately I think it’s only a matter of time before there is one. Laser eye surgery for example, these days, is relatively routine but can still make some people’s sight worse than before they had it done.
Makes me think of the whole permanent makeup thing all over again.

I'd assume she's going to NYC because this procedure is very niche and not available just anywhere. That part is believable enough.

This is a big thing amongst brown eyed people wanting blue or green eyes.
My friend is an opthalmologist, she is so against this op. I can't imagine anyone wanting to mess with their eyes.
If my daughter wanted to do this I'd be horrified too op, I really feel for you.

Assuming she's an adult, it's nothing to do with you. She can whatever she wants with her own body and take whatever risks she wants. You don't need to support it, but neither do you need to have an argument about it.

And what's she going to do if there are any complications? Keep visiting New York for treatment (if there is any treatment) or insist the NHS sorts out the fuck-up? With NHS waiting times as they are now?

What kind of colour change are we talking about? Brown to blue, or her current natural colour to something completely unnatural like black?

Why surgery, and not coloured contacts? Has she used coloured contact at all?

Why New York?

And of course her eyesight could be damaged - it's surgery! A simple google will pull up lots of information on it.

Another consideration is that if she has any complications during or afterwards, her medical insurance won’t cover it and mesical costs would be $$$, can she afford that?

A cosmetic operation isn't healthcare. And presumably she would be going there simply because that's where the procedure happens to be available, not because it's affordable.

What is the real problem behind this? Because it's not to do with her eye colour. Does she have self-esteem issues? Is she obsessive about her appearance? Why now? She needs to tackle whatever it is that makes her think her natural colouring isn't fine.

And who do you reckon will be looking after this idiotic woman if the worst happens and she loses her eyesight?

The among of idiotic things people are allowed to do is beyond me, like leg lengthening surgery. People have more money than sense!

Ugh op I feel for you. You can only warn her. I would email her or text her all the risks and then that’s all you can do. My mum tried to stop me having a tummy tuck and a boob job. I still did and I regret not listening to her.

What type of surgery is this? As I have read and watched many horror stories on it and of people going blind or partially blind.

Just as an aside, blue eyes are the most common eye colour in the UK, so if she's going to have her brown irises lasered to burn off the brown pigment so they can get to the blue underneath it seems a bit daft to me.

Good god. I’ve heard of this procedure but I didn’t think anybody actually had it done. What does she think is wrong with her eye colour? A crazy waste of money.

Do you regret the tummy tuck? Im thinking of doing it

As an aside, I asked Google if blue or brown was the most common eye colour in the UK and found this spectacular example of how shit AI is.

https://eu.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2024/01/11/how-to-change-your-eye-color-doctor-advice-trend/72177039007/