Torn about holiday

[HollyJollySea]

NC for this.

DH’s big birthday falls very nicely during the next school holidays ( 2weeks). He’d really like us to go away for two weeks to a warm climate.
However, DC is in year 11 and currently narrowly missing his target grades. He has SEN.
I’ve recently started helping him to revise specifically for GCSEs. He’s starting some tutoring sessions soon. I was hoping he could’ve some targeted sessions during the holiday days too, to give him a boost.
In our shoes, would you go away at that time? Or would you postpone it to second week in July when school breaks again for all DC but the holiday will also be significantly more expensive and the weather might be wetter. We could spend an hour or so a day revising, I suppose.

Nothing has been booked yet, he loves leaving things a bit late when booking holidays.

If we postponed it, I’d take DH away for a weekend for his birthday.

In typing this, I think we should go and celebrate but wondering what MNers think…
yabu- go and celebrate
yanbu - postpone it and focus on dc’s exams for now

If you go away what message are you giving your son about the importance of GCSEs?

It would be interesting to see how many of those saying "go at easter" have been through it.

Absolutely no way and it is selfish and immature of your husband to want to go away on his actual birthday in these circumstances.

I love my birthday but there is no way as an adult in would prioritise that over my child's future.

I’d go away later. An adult birthday doesn’t trump a kiddo getting ready to sit exams, especially if they are needing a bit of help/ boost to get their confidence up.

the holiday after school breaks up will be the goal at the end of exams weeks.

Lower GCSE results have absolutely no bearing on future earnings
Work ethic, A-levels, and degrees are what count.
Once you hit 19 no employer ever asks for your GCSE results!

I've been through it - and if I had the chance again I'd absolutely take my child away at Easter.
I chose not to and during Easter he was stressed, anxious, couldn't chill out and in the end it totally affected his mental health and his GCSEs. He was constantly revising to the point he made himself unwell.
If I'd booked the holiday to somewhere warmer we could have still taken his revision but he could have revised in a more relaxed environment. And would have probably put the books down a bit more to enjoy the pool etc!

No they don't! The exams don't start until May! Easter is 10th April, with Easter Sunday being the middle weekend of the school holidays!

Postpone. GCSEs are very important. Revising on holiday is unlikely really isn’t it and getting your child to do this whilst on hols could be unnecessary stress for all. Do something nice on the day then book the hols for 1st week of July. (Exams are over then) prices won’t be as high as mid July then from England (diff in Scot and ni). Don’t screw up your child’s future for some fun in the sun.

Exams are not the be all and end all! It all depends what he wants to do after school ends too. Go and enjoy the holiday but invclude some revision in the mornings whilst away. It might actually do him a favour and help his performance to get away from the immense amount of exam pressure on teenagers

My son is 16 and did his exams last year. He passed all his when his prediction grade for English was a 3 he got a 4. Maths was 5 predicted 4. We took him on days out on weekends to give him a break. If you revise too much you can just stress and stress doesn't do anything for anyone even more so for learning. Take revision books with you and you can do an hour per book per day. One before you go out. One before evening meal and one before going out on a night for example. This would probably be the best revision practice tbf. Go on holiday 😀

Have you spoken to your DS? I've been through the GCSE'S twice with DS's and there's absolutely no way they would have wanted to go away with revision and tutoring sessions on laptop hanging over them. If you've got a great tutor don't mess it up now, get them booked in! A holiday can be taken anytime but the consequences of not getting basic GCSE'S are far reaching. No one wants to have to repeat years or do resits. Plan a revision timetable with DS to cover all there subjects and tutoring sessions booked in. Leave evenings free to relax/ treats.

No but Universities look at GCSE grades particularly the high RG group ones and Oxbridge.

There’s no way I’d have gone away the Easter hols before GCSE or A Levels. However much studying they do it’s not the same as being focussed at home, more like ticking a box for a couple of hours to be able to do another activity.
Also is your son really going to enjoy the holiday with his exams looming, much better to wait and go straight afterwards which will means prices will be out of term time peak and your son can really relax as well.

Which is unlikely a child who is struggling to get GCSEs are going to be applying to such places

I think I would postpone the holiday until the summer when everyone can properly enjoy it. Yes, you could take the revision with you, but how much is actually going to get done and would you and DS be able to relax knowing you've got revision hanging over you every day.
Take DH away for a weekend.
Get the tutoring started and extra sessions booked in.

Sorry OP you are trying to justify a holiday at your kids expense.

Worst time to go on holiday and you want us to make you feel like it’s okay.

Your kid is already struggling and needs a tutor and you think a holiday right before important exams is a good idea?

Honestly I really don’t understand people sometimes.

Teachers have to put their GCSE results on applications for the rest of their careers. Even headteacher applications.

Exactly right. Not to mention apprenticeships and uni goes out the window if GCSE’s are bad.

There are absolutely jobs that ask for these as the poster here has shown.

@CosyLemur you are right that employers aren't interested in GCSE grades if an interviewee has higher qualifications. However, poor grades affect the next step.

Whether a student wants to study A levels, BTEC, an apprenticeship or other further education GCSE grades do matter - very much. They decide the direction a young person takes. And young people need to continue taking English and maths until they pass.

It is mich less of a hassle to pass first time.

My DC asked me not to book any family holidays leading up to their exams. Normally we would have gone away Feb half term and Easter.

But if he doesn’t pass English and Maths, he will have to keep resitting until he does? When he’s not at school anymore getting support in lessons? So, although I completely agree there’s more to life and wish this isn’t how it was, why do that to him for the sake of waiting a couple of months to go away?

If your DC was flying and looking good for the exams, I’d say go.
If they were way off and never going to get decent grades, I’d say go.

As it is, they are marginal, and with an extra boost over the next few months, could turn their fortune around. I wouldn’t go away. I’d focus on their tuition/revision and give them every help to get the best grades they can.

Celebrate the birthday with a weekend for just the two of you and a bigger holiday after the exams, but before the official school holidays start (cheaper!).

A lot of schools do extra classes after school, on Saturdays and during the holidays for Year 11. If your DS is struggling a bit it would be madness to go on holiday before the exams.

We postponed all breaks away before exams and just did holidays afterwards. If cost is an issue, I'd wait until next year, sorry. It's really really important that your DS feels supported to do his best

This is AWFUL advice. Really awful. If students don’t get a 4 or above in English Langauge and Maths it will 100% hold them back. They will need to continue studying English and maths until they get the grade 4. So this will be alongside their college course/apprenticeship or whatever they choose to go on to do. If they struggle when they were getting 3-4 hours a week at school dedicated to the subject, they will struggle even more when they are trying to pass once they have left school.

No way would I go away

@Bo1978 which advice is awful? (just for clarity for
op)

@Bo1978 i wholeheartedly agree with you re the importance of those exams.