To think we're going to have a generation of adults unable to socialise?

[Ezlo]

By that I mean in restaurants. I see so many kids glued to their iPods in restaurants, barely uttering a word to the rest of their family. The future unsettles me.

Are they paying? If not, they can pipe down!

That's a rather broad statement. Books aren't just for entertainment you know.

In any case, the research on educational reading and tasks is pretty clear - reading online and typing are not as effective, which is surely the point of education.

It's both of these things really, both being alone and socializing.

I think a lot of the mental health issues we see now in kids and adults are very much connected to this, despite all the people convinced that everything is just the same as before.

I sometimes wonder how old people who claim that are? Of course not everyone is perfect before! But many of us do remember the degree to which the rhythms of life were vastly different.

The fact that loneliness now is at an all time high is not a coincidence.

I never said they were just for entertainment

And whether something is effective (or not) depends entirely on the people involved. Everyone learns in different ways and finds different methods of education to be effective.

All these generalisations of "screens are bad" are getting boring, tbh.

The fact that loneliness now is at an all time high is not a coincidence.

Is it at an all time high, though, or is the world just more connected with a better way of recording things?

There has been quite a lot of work done on how the brain learns, the amount of sidtraction that happens when kids are learning online, and also in terms of writing, the importance of the physical actions of moving the pen. They are pretty definitive, in particular around literacy.

Sometimes there are exceptions, especially for kids with certain specific issues like visual impairment. But this idea you seem to have that there are no differernces in how kids learn is just untrue.

As for loneliness, again, statistics on this have been kept for some time, and there has been a huge uptick in loneliness. Online activity seems not to have the protective factors that real interactions do. There is also a significant correlation with depression and other types of poor mh.

You give the impression that if it became normative to give kids drugs to keep them quiet you would think that was just great, because after all, people have always wanted to keep kids quiet.

a huge uptick in loneliness or a huge uptick in reported loneliness?

You seem to be arguing against a bunch of things that I haven't actually said, for some reason. It's like you have a load of stuff you want to say but you aren't actually reading what you're responding to - you're just commenting because you just have to get it all out

Edit to make it make sense.

Who are you levying that stream of consciousness at? Nobody has said anything of the sort on this thread. Your 'drug' comment is banal and nonsensical, I think you're here to goad.

@ObelixtheGaul

I think the problem in some cases is the 'vice versa'. Recently, I have seen an increase in 'performative introversion', by which I mean people actively promoting their preferences as having some level of intellectual superiority.

I have honestly never seen anyone who is introverted/doesn't care to socialise much act 'all superior,' or come across with any performative introversion. I think this is all in your head. You, (like some others on this thread,) seem to take it very personally when someone prefers their own company to others much of the time, and prefers to stay in with a box set, and a hot chocolate, rather than go out 'socialising' with people who they really don't want to be with.

And I genuinely see the social butterflies and extroverts being far more rude and nasty towards the introverts - than the introverts are about them. I have seen work colleagues in the past, and people in neighbourhoods I have lived in, being bullied and got at - because they have the audacity to say 'no' to most social events. (And even some people being nasty to their own extended family members.)

Seriously, I have seen so many social butterflies/extroverts throwing their toys out of the pram, huffing and puffing, and turning their back on introverts, and calling them miserable anti-social cunts behind their back. I never see the 'anti-social' introverts being nasty about the extroverts. As I said, extroverts are waaaay more nasty than the 'anti-social' introverts.

@PassingStranger · Today 15:40

I feel you probably don't know how to interact with people in real life, you don't possess the skill is more than likely.

Why else would someone not want to interact with anyone in real life ever.
It's probably you that's boring love.

All the people you know you had to get to know once.
It's probably best you don't bother though.

Stick to your own kind lol. We are all just people of this earth.
If your so anti chatting, I doubt you would bring anything worthwhile to the conversation anyway.

Can't bring anything to the party is an apt saying.

@Completelyjo

This is such a bizarre take, and you’re so angry. You aren’t owed conversation on the bus. The fact that you resort to insults because someone wouldn’t start taking to you on a bus is crazy. You clearly have too much time on your hands.

I agree with you 'completelyjo.' The post from 'passingstranger' is batshit, and she does sound furious, and like she is taking it personally that people don't want to socialise much! How rude and entitled does 'passingstranger' sound?!!

Like, 'how DARE someone not engage in conversation with me, just how DARE they?!' 😆

And what a nasty, vitriolic post from her!

'Don't bother!'
'Stick to your own kind!'
'I doubt you would bring anything to the conversation anyway!'
'You sound so boring...'
'I bet you don't even possess any skills to enable to you to interact with people.'

PMSL! 😆 Someone is bitter. Sounds like a LOT of people don't want to talk to her, or socialise with her. I can't imagine why! 😂

@Completelyjo got you there @fingerbobz 😆

Reminds me of a time once when I was in Morning Prayers at my junior school, (around 8 y.o.) I had my eyes open, and was looking around the hall for about 30 seconds (when we were supposed to have our head(s) down and our eyes closed)

Straight after morning prayers, one of the other girls said to one of the teachers, 'Miss! Miss! Typewriter's eyes were open during morning prayers, and she was looking all around the room.'

The teacher said, 'well, you must have had your eyes open too Julie, to have seen Typewriters with her eyes open!!! Now shut up and sit down!' 😆

@wombat15

"When was your childhood? I think you are talking about a very narrow period of time if children used to go to restaurants and chat to adults. When I was a child, restaurants and pubs were for adults. Children didn't go to them but still managed to learn social skills Or do you think only people your age have social skills?"

Mid to late 70s, although I'm not sure that's relevant. Your experience may have been different to mine, but I'm assuming you learned social skills through interacting with others in whatever setting that was?

@SouthLondonMum22

"Surely if you were looking at the other table for the whole time during your meal, you can't have had the best social skills either during that time? If you only looked at them here and there then you may have missed several occasions where they chatted to each other and/or their parents."

Fair point, had I not been away with work and eating alone.

and you spent the whole time watching that table?

Yes. Stared at them the whole time.

If that's true and you're not mocking, it's really unpleasant. Did nobody teach you not to stare?

You are around the same age as me then. Obviously I learned social skills outside of restaurants as did the great majority of your peers if you lived in the UK as children didn't eat in restaurants then.

The generational cohort worst one for that (although clearly it is not applicable to all, but an observation of far greater prevalence of these characteristics in their cohort than any other) are the Boomers: incapable of considering other points of view, full of indignation at the temerity that anybody may disagree with them, happy to disregard any facts that don't fit their narrative (extremely high levels of cognitive dissonance), shockingly high levels of entitlement but lacking the self-awareness to reflect on their behaviour so routinely accuse other people of being entitled, and routinely speaking to others in an astonishingly disrespectful manner yet seem to have an allergy to the word "sorry".

Clearly a childhood without screens didn't do much to help their social skills.

How could I be taking it personally, since, if you actually read all my post, you would have seen I am not one of those people who likes to talk to strangers at all. I just don't refer to people who do as 'random dullards' (actual quote from this very thread, sounds pretty superior to me).

Actually, your whole post is a pretty good example of what I am talking about, to be honest.

It’s not just devices though l. It’s helicopter parenting. Children are free play outside or have much independence due to current paradigms around “safety”. So what else will they do with their free time ?

The way people socialise is changing.

For example, when I was young online dating was unheard of. There was a huge stigma attached to it and you were seen as weird if you couldn't find a partner irl and had to resort to the internet. People who found their partner online would lie about having done so. Now look at us.

If you can't navigate your way around on social media you are held back these days. I have gone up for jobs when they have asked how many followers I have on ig other sm.

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

Oh dear.
Yes I was mocking.
For clarity, they were right in my line of vision. It was difficult not to look at them. They may well have exchanged comments, but every time they caught my eye both boys were eyes down headphones on.

Apologies then, I'm extremely literal sometimes. I read your post several times and I couldn't see the 'mock'. Good to know.

Great idea.