Step son used my bath towel

[Green0911]

Want to gauge if IABU here.

My and my husband's towels are in the bathroom. Teenage SS keeps his in his room. We each have a hand towel and a bath towel. They all get changed every 3-4 days. When it came to changing them, I realised SS didn't have his towels in his room. He said he'd put them to be laundered a few days before. When I asked him which towels he'd been using in the meantime (he'd showered at least twice during this period), initially he claimed none, then admitted he'd used mine.

I blew a fuse. Couldn't believe he thought this was acceptable. Husband has laughed it off and is accusing me of being dramatic/blowing things out of proportion.

AIBU?

I agree the reaction was OTT, especially if it was the first time. However, I do understand it might have been the straw that broke the camels back if you have explained this to him, especially if more than once. Or if he has form for getting into your stuff you've told him not to. If he regularly invades your privacy or stomps on your boundaries. Or what his regular pattern of behaviour towards you is.

I think I must be doing bath towels wrong. We don't have individual ones. There's a few hanging up, you use the dryers/closest one and I put them in the wash after a swimming day (one every other day). Me and 2 teenage girls, just using whichever towels. I honestly didn't know this was a thing. You only use towels when clean.

What a performance! For a towel! So much angst.

He’s a teenage boy. They’re disgusting. They drink from the milk carton when nobody is looking.

Why is his towel kept in his room, not in the bathroom like the rest of the family’s? Is it because he has more of a guest status?

Yes, this was gross but just teenage boy gross rather than anything more sinister. He probably kept forgetting to take his towel into the bathroom or couldn’t be bothered.

I suggest you keep your own towel in the bedroom since you are almost certainly the less lazy and the more forward thinking of the two of you.

I think it’s weird he has to keep a towel in his bedroom, I have never heard of that before.

This is a complete over reaction (I blew a fuse) It and sounds like you went on a bit as well initially he claimed none, then admitted he'd used mine.

Everyone makes mistakes, more so teenagers. Do you have a lot of rules he has to follow?.

I agree with PP ‘He is a teenager be grateful he showers’.

That's teenage boys for you. If anything I'm impressed he's showered twice in three days.

Some advice OP, if you really are picky about these things. Wash the soap before you wash yourself ! 😁

Cross posted with @Oodlesandoodlesofnoodles who summarised more perfectly my thoughts!

I would find that pretty grim because you could be drying your face right where someone’s bum or privates have just been. But I live in a house full of men and boys so maybe it’s different.

But you still are wiping sweat, oils and countless dead skin cells onto the towel after a shower. Food for bacteria.

I know - but I am used to it so it is no big deal. Also don't like showering on an already wet floor, so I always have to shower first. Apart from that, I think I am relatively normal ...

@BettyBardMacDonald how often do you wash your bedding? Do you ever go out and mix with the general public who will be shedding skin cells etc

He's a teenager....showing a lack of respect or through a thoughtless attitude sort of comes with the territory.....and the hormones. I'm sure he won't do it again and I don't think this sounds like a plot to overthrow his wicked stepmother.

I don't blame you one bit. Its nasty to have someone else, especially a teenager use your bath towel and not even tell you. He basically dried all his parts on your towel that you might dry your face on. It's rude and disrespectful. I would of been pissed too.

Never been sick from a towel….not ever!

God I hate soap bars for the reason you implied.

And?

It’s annoying but pretty typical of teenagers so YABU

No women have “privates and bums” as well, I assume they get dried!

I think she probably can’t be arsed to put up with his normal teenage behaviour as he isn’t her son? And she probably wouldn’t be so annoyed if he wasn’t a step son. Not saying right or wrong just why she blew her fuse over something that should have been a conversation. And as a PP said maybe this is not an isolated incident.

@Poppins21 we all have our own individual soap bars, face towels, body towels and bath mats!

Liquid soap for after toilet hand washing on a battery operated soap dispenser.

I think working in infection control messed with my head a bit 😂.

This thread is just mad.

If anything ever showed how skewed Mumsnet is towards the particularly well off middle class (without even going to the wealthy Western world aspect) this thread has to be up there.

If you can afford to own the required number of towels for every member of the family to have several, and to launder them every day, you're in the tiniest of minorities of the world's population. And to claim that not doing so is a significant health risk is just laughable, given that the population continues to grow.

I'd love to see the stats on used towel deaths.

Presumably AFTER he had washed though.

How do you feel about him in general?

YANBU. I would be furious too. It's complete lack of respect and now you can't trust him.

oh yes I see bacteria, viruses and parasites around every corner 😂

Oh dear lord, it’s now three towels each!