How much input do you have in your partners wardrobe/appearance

[User09678]

AIBU to wonder how much input you have in how your partner dresses and presents themselves?

Do you have none at all? Down to not even expressing preferences (yes/no stubble, nice shirt, where are those shoes?) do you compliment what you like, ignore what you don't. Do you even notice? Like if they totally let themselves go at what point would you say something or they maybe went in some weird direction...

Or are you quite active in encouraging them to wear what they like, assuming they do too. Are they quite happy to accept suggestions, do you buy them clothes, do you buy ALL their clothes?!

And vice versa I suppose!

No input into dh’s wardrobe and he doesn’t have any input in mine.
Just neither of us are especially bothered about what the other wears!
I have a colleague who’s fanatical about co-ordinating with her husband when they are going out for dinner, she goes out at lunch to pick him up eg a tie that will match her shoes or a shirt that will compliment her bag. Bonkers imo, because if dh or I go anywhere, the first we know of what each other are wearing will be as we’re getting ready 😂
But we’re all different, I don’t openly judge her decision!

No input at all and if he's wearing something particularly nice, I compliment him like I would anyone.

I work with a couple of women who buy their husbands clothes for them and will have a conversation that can last all lunchtime, regarding the best place to buy their shirts, boxers and socks.

It's like they never got past the 1950s 😳🤣

Mostly none, it would be really controlling to try and dictate what another adult wears. If we were going somewhere formal, where he's there with/because of me, I may ask him to follow the dress code (eg. Not jeans to my sisters wedding), but he would generally manage that anyway.

If I noticed he was regularly wearing a jumper with holes in it, I might buy him a similar new jumper as part of his next birthday/Christmas present, but that would be the extent of my involvement.

My DH is not interested in clothes really. He buys cheap but functional stuff. Yes I could "improve" him but I'm not that bothered what he wears. Yes he's a bit overgrown teenager in his choices sometimes but we can't all be stylish can we. He has other qualities that make up for a bit of sloppiness clothes wise.

He's pretty good at realising when things don't fit/ are worn out. Apart from a much loved jumper that started to get holes in but he still wore out and about.

Fortunately I found one similar enough for a Xmas present and he has transferred his affection to the new one. He's wearing it now. Bless him.

None.

Might buy them something on occasion. Usually based on what I think they’d like, rather than what I’d like them to wear.

No input really but he knows he’s not allowed to wear his wolf fleece when he’s out with me 🤣

I buy clothes for him but only because I love shopping. He chooses his work clothes because they're tailored suits, but I have input in his casual clothes. He wears suits all day but dresses like a son of anarchy outside of work, so I don't mind getting involved.

I buy my clothes but he has a say in them, he's also good at buying me clothes. We're happy to critique outfits and request certain clothes or hair styling etc

We've definitely said "what on earth are you wearing" before!

OMG my FIL has a wolf fleece!

I'm not quite sure what MIL makes of it to be honest 🤣

None. He will ask my thoughts rarely but he decides what he wears. I like his style

Zero.

I'd rather not have/need to have input but my partner periodically let's himself go and I remind him to smarten up for work at least. He's not materialistic which I honestly admire but he can look insanely bedraggled which is a shame because he's a seriously attractive man :)

We find we increasingly need to anti-coordinate. We have a similar style and are drawn to similar colours. Too often we finish getting dressed and realise we are wearing near identical outfits. One of us will then get changed 😂

What do you mean "let themselves go"?!

It's fucking rude and controlling to dictate someone else's appearance

None, like he doesn't get to say what I wear either.

I mean, if I like a particular jumper or something, I would say "I like that jumper" as I would with anyone I met.

Very little, older when met but he'll ask my opinion/I will offer one if shopping together however his style is very much set. He does encourage me to spend more on myself as 25 years of motherhood means I forget that my money is mine now

What do you mean "let themselves go"?!

Have you never heard of this in relation to appearance?

It generally means looking scruffy/disheveled/no longer caring about appearance (although sometimes it can relate to hygiene too).

None. Except his socks and slippers because I bought him some for Christmas. Same the other way around.

Almost zero. He might ask me what I think of something before he buys it and I'll tell him him honestly, but otherwise nothing.

Very very occasionally in the past I've told him if I didn't like something, but I think twice in 15 years.

I do tell him when socks/pants need to go in the bin though!

I tend to buy him coats or nice jumpers as birthday presents, but only ones I know he will wear (because they look like all his other ones!). Occasionally I branch out with a slightly different shade of blue 😁. I really pushed the boat out with a purple one once, but he never wore it! But that's the extent of my contribution.

Not a lot. I have told him in the past if what he is wearing looks awful, although it is generally light hearted .
But he’s a middle aged man, comfortable in his conservative style , so unless he asks for feedback, I leave him be.

How much input do you and your partner have into each others' appearance?

I think that’s fair enough 😂😂

Zero input.

I like how he dresses and, presumably, he likes (or at elast doesn't dislike) how I dress most of the time.

I wouldn't choose his clothes for him and wouldn't buy him clothes unless I knew he'd love it too but he'd appreciate it if I did that and the same is true of him. It's not happened yet though.

Why do you ask?

Quite a lot. DH isn't that interested in clothes, so I tend to buy things if I see something I like and think he will (he usually does).
He is grateful to me as he hates clothes shopping.
He does have some input to my clothes, if I am not sure about something, he will offer an opinion.

Absolutely none. 😂 And no interest, to the extent that I don’t actually know what size he wears and if he were to go missing, I would never be able to give you a description of what he’s wearing, despite the fact he probably only has 5 different changes of clothes. He obviously looks perfectly attractive, which is why I married him, but that’s the extent of my interest in his appearance. I guess I would take issue if he started wearing something outlandish, like a MAGA hat or something bonkers. But of the two of us, I’m the only one likely to wear something embarrassing (😂 but god, not MAGA).