DD relationship with 50 yr old

[Bonniethecat1]

I have found out my DD is in sexual relationship with a man who turned 50 in August and she is not far off turning 25.. I think he is using her and how can I convince her to stop seeing him, she actually has admitted feelings for him, aibu to think this is so wrong? I can't stand this.

We'veall been 25. We all can agree we will have made some very unwise choices. Yes we live and learn but it is not shocking to discuss on a forum how inappropriate these massive age gap relationships are.

Yes.
CHOICES.
As an adult you get to make your own choices.
For a supposedly women's forum this infantilising of us and turning it all onto the man and what he wants is pretty 🙄
Like we don't have a mind of our own and are just being preyed on.

At 25 most people have been working for at least 7 years, many people 9 years. They'll have completed university, possibly whilst away from home. They'll probably have had a few different relationships.

They are not some wide eyed 18 year old with little experience of the world.

I don’t know why you are so outraged that senior assisted living and retirement homes start at 55! I didn’t make up the rules of what retirement homes are available- there is obviously plenty of people that need them!! And buy them! That need help living independently ffs.

I don’t know why you are so outraged that senior assisted living and retirement homes start at 55! I didn’t make up the rules of what retirement homes are available- there is obviously plenty of people that need them!! And buy them! That need help living independently ffs.

No one is suggesting that a 25yr hasn't had relationships? Most however not with a creep twice their age.

As if you would know…

But plenty of you are implying that a 25 year old is naive and inexperienced and therefore vulnerable...

You're the one who is probably a child

There are plenty of twenty years old plus that are inexperienced and they won’t have the same life experience or knowledge as the old codger either.

How is it a ridiculous over generalisation when the City Centre is heaving on Fri & Sat nights like this every weekend?

In a couple of years won't OPs DD be a bit past it to be clubbing in Ibiza by your own over generalisations? 😅

That need help living independently ffs.

At 55? 😂😂😂

Err, no.

It's grim and a 50 year old who 'dates' women half his age is not a catch.

Yes, I'd say the same if the genders were reversed but we all know they almost never are.

However, she's an adult so you can't and shouldn't do anything about it. Most likely she'll get bored and dump this loser soon enough anyway.

I understand your concern OP
Age gap etc and you are her mum
Take care,if you appear to criticise or intrude, it may make things difficult

At 25 she’s OLD ENOUGH to decide for herself — she doesn’t NEED your approval.
Are you envious or something?
It’s her life to live and she’s living it.
If she makes mistakes they’ll be her mistakes.
Sheezus.

There must be a market 😂🤷‍♀️
It’s a legal requirement too, so someone more learned that us must have decided that this was the best age to offer people retirement home and assisted living facilities…

She may be using him? He will have money , cars, property.
Either way it's nothing to do with you

Or he might be washed up and redundant. No guarantees that age equals wealth…

It’s a legal requirement too, so someone more learned that us must have decided that this was the best age to offer people retirement home and assisted living facilities…

No idea, but I've never known anyone to live in anything like that at that age, even if it's technically offered. Have you?
I mean, my neighbour is 70 and she's still caring for her own dad, to put it in perspective.

Most of my neighbours retired at 55 (BT and fire service pensions used to be great) so the very real possibility of living with a pensioner is very, very likely regardless of assisted living arrangements.

Not exactly sexy living is it!

The op has asked for opinions?

No I'm not envious, quite happy with our dc having lovely partners of the same generation.

I seriously doubt at 50 he's washed up. I mean unsure how old you are, but you do realize that the soon to be retirement age for women will be 67? And it sounds like you have a very long time to go until that point. I doubt you'll be thinking 50 is geriatric by then...

What happens when they do something that doesn't meet your approval?!
They're "lucky" you "approve" of their grown adult choices for now

The reality is that 50 is very likely to feel very old to a young person.

Oh they often do. We discuss things, share opinions everything is good. Fortunately none of them have pitched up with someone twice their age though.