DD no longer allowed to walk from school.

[TheWonderhorse]

DD is 9 and has been walking from school to a car park just off the grounds (not the official school car park but closer). She's been really wanting to walk home but we compromised at this for now and would work up to that gradually. I signed a consent form to permit them to release her.

So this morning the school sent a letter out saying that they've had a rethink to all parents, and from Monday only Year 6 children are to be allowed to leave the classroom without a parent.

DD is Year 4 but the oldest in her class, meaning we won't be allowed to start this again for 17 months. AIBU to ask the head to reconsider? I know they can't really refuse to let her out, but I don't want to be a dick. I just feel like DD is being held back for no good reason at all. We have this covered and didn't need the school to intervene.

IABU, school know best.
IANBU it's up to the parent to judge what's safe for the child.

I can see it rom both sides.

You've sent an email saying you're happy with your DD walking to the car park as only a few yards away.

God forbid something happened to your DD can you honestly say you wouldn't turn and blame the school for letting her out on her own.

Comments, not poll. I didnt mention poll.

Comments, not poll percentage.

They can refuse to let them out. At my DCs school, they weren't allowed to walk to or from school alone until April of Year 6. We lived a six minute walk away. It fucked me off so much. How dare they think they are in a better place to risk assess my children, than I am?! Schools think they have way too much power, IMO.

Heaven forbid you were around in the 70s or even 90s when it was far more dangerous then!

And I imagine if that was the case where OP lives she wouldn’t have consented when her DD asked her.

It’s 53% now OP
wonder if the headmaster is on MN or show him this for comment 😆

People trying to frame children walking part of the way home from school as lazy parenting is some next level batshittery 😂

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I work full time out of the house. I was forced to pay for after school childcare for an 11 year old who could almost see his house from the school gates, and was grown up enough to sit at home for half an hour until his 15 year old sister got home. Yes, I was fucked off.

I would put in writing that as your child's parent you have thoroughly assessed the risks and that your child will be walking home alone at the end of the school day. There is no minimum age, they are older than the 'recommended' age by the NSPCC, they are your child, and this is your decision to make. You will be happy to take it up with anyone the school wants to refer you to.

https://www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/away-from-home/at-school/

I walked to and from school on my own from year 2 onward, schools are so soft nowadays. Basically teaching kids they are useless in the real world.

You wouldn't let your 9 y/o walk 50ft to a car park directly from their school? That's hardly an excessive rush towards independence? It sounds like a small manageable step towards fostering age appropriate independence.

It's something I've always thought to be really odd in England. We live abroad and DS's school actively encourages parents to drop kids off at the car park a little further away from Year 2 onwards. It's a five-minute walk up a really safe path, which is running alongside the road, has some play equipment and is lit when it's dark. In the afternoon, lots of parents and children walk that way. In the morning, it's a bit more spread out, depending on when you get there.

We're moving soon and while DS (Year 3) can take the bus in the morning (takes 6 minutes), he could also walk to school (it's up a really steep hill, though, which is rather annoying in the mornings...been there, done that) and I'd expect him to walk back through the village by himself at home time (takes about 20-30 minutes).

Why would they not be allowed to walk home?

Agree, @Fuzzypinetree , I'm in Scotland and we have none of these crazy uniform rules/not allowed to walk. It's only P1/2 that must be collected, after that it's the parents choice.

You can work towards dds ‘independence’ at the weekends and during school holidays, when she is wholly your responsibility. During school hours, and on school grounds she is in the care of the school, and they have a right to be concerned. There might be sightings of a man hanging around or a car that seems suspicious. It’s unlikely this change has come from nowhere.

I am all for children becoming fully autonomous and independent, but I don’t see the point in rushing - she is just nine years old. We had a friend like this, and by the time her dd was 13 she was taking it to a whole new level.

Consider whether it is also important to instill safety and being realistic about the dangers (and her ability to protect herself which at this age will be extremely limited) Enjoy the younger years, they evaporate very quickly.

I used to walk home from age 6. My parents worked full time. Normal where we lived and after-school clubs weren't a thing.

There are some really ridiculous responses on this thread! OP - you're likely to be in the position where on the face of it, the thing you want is absolutely reasonable but one if the following apply.

One child nicely waiting in a car park - no issue. Half of Y4 running and messing around in the car park while parents are coming and going - risk assessment fail. So only the more sensible older classes only are released.

Or - possible threats which have been identified locally which the head may or may not be able to share with you. (Think of a particular register which is shared with school heads but not the general public.)

Or- school needs to line up with LA or MAT trust guidelines.

It will likely be one of the above.

Where I lived previously, all children went to middle school in year 5. Almost all walked. Many walked home from year 4 to prepare for the much longer walk from year 5.
We moved and youngest dd was at primary instead. She walked home from year 5.
Unless you live somewhere crime ridden I don't get it!

Yeah I kinda agree with this. 9 is still very young. With a car park there are cars turning, parking moving etc. I’m not sure I would trust a nine year old to have enough whereabouts to navigate all of that plus the large amounts of people and traffic - perhaps this is what the school are thinking.

I never complained to school about anything when mine were at school, but this is the hill I'd be prepared to die on. It should be your choice, not the schools.

That’s ridiculous, it’s on the school grounds.

It’s not surprising there are so many children with anxiety, they’re not allowed to do anything without supervision!

At my son's Junior school, only Year 5 and 6 were allowed to be let out at the end of the day with no parent present and walk to/from school alone. We had to give consent, via a form. I have not heard of schools in my area allowing Year 4 or under to leave without a parent.