To ask if you take your children out alone

[ijustdontcareifhedid]

I don’t mean to the park or soft play, more big days out.

YABU yes

YANBU no

What I’ve found is that eventually she cedes defeat and naps in the buggy but never for long and actually getting to that point is awful with so much crying and distress, it mars the whole day a bit!

car is easiest but then you have to either wake her up at the other end and if she’s not ready that’s hard or wait in the car with a bored preschooler!

I'm very disabled and yet I took them longhaul, alone, for almost a month.

If I don't do it, nobody else will. Ive wasted enough of my life on (justifiable, and even at one point medicated levels of) anxiety, it became time to grab the bull by the horns. In small and larger ways ,it saved my life, this breaking out so uncharacteristically.

I do, because if I didn’t, we wouldn’t go anywhere over the summer (and a good chunk of the spring and autumn too!) due to DHs work. He just isn’t around! I only have one at the moment, and know that’s obviously rather easier than two or more, but plan to carry on as we are when our second arrives in a few weeks. All cases are different, just do what works for you!

One is definitely quite easy in a way because you can adapt the day totally to them, their stage and age and interests. My older one starts school next year and I’m kind of looking forward to only having my younger one. But then I feel bad my older one is having his time compromised!

I have in the past but not very often. We usually save big expensive days/ trips away as a family as we both want to experience the trip. We wouldn’t be able to afford to go separately.

Oh that definitely sounds like a struggle! Is she definitely tired when she naps? What I used to do was just wait until they were actually obviously knackered then put them in the pram. At home nap time tended to be around 2pm, but if we were out it'd change. So I didn't bother sticking to any schedule and just scooped up and put in pram when they looked ready to drop! Stopped the battle a bit.

Yes, mum of twin's and DH worked long hours up to school age. So didn't really have a choice.

They went everywhere with me for normal days and then we also did long 'going out' days just the 3 of us. They were both highly energetic & mischievous and loved to run off. So I was typically the mum on high alert looking slightly dishevelled at all times!

However, I loved our time together and have wonderful memories of those days...including their various antics!

My only recommendation is to keep it simple e.g. anything in nature was a much better fit for us when they were little. Have fun x

For some unknown reason, I actually find taking mine 4 & 2 on big days out easier than taking them to the park/soft play. Don't know if it's because I have to plan it more or be more organised or what. Whereas soft play I wait till my partner's off as well and we go together

I take my 4 and 2 year old out everywhere all the time. I've got friends who find taking their kids out alone too stressful.

It's entirely up to yourself but for me it's part of the reason I had kids.

All the time.
Day trips into London, museums, galleries, beaches, country parks, castles, theatre.
Most of the time, I decided what I wanted to do then just dragged them out with me.
I didn't even worry about taking the buggy on the underground as I knew someone would help and they always did.
I prefer driving somewhere though.

I would but their dad is very present and wouldn't like to miss out on that's stuff so it's always organised when we're both available. But if dad wasn't in the picture? I suppose so but I wouldn't do half as much and I wouldn't enjoy it very much either.

We do both! But out of necessity we have to split annual leave to cover pre school/school holidays, so both I and (very present) DH will take all the children out alone otherwise we’d get pretty bored.

I ignored naps. I took a sling, carried on with what I wanted to do. My age gap is 4 years though and both DC dropped naps at 18 months.

I'm a single parent so yes all the time.

So what happens in school holidays?

Once we moved here there was more on locally - though did walk across entire city for some council put on actives but between swimming - they were catching up - and local art cinema and local walks always seemed lots for them to do.

I was encouraged to go to city DH worked in - train journey and had some awful experiences - I think if I'd gone to other nearby city or know buses from nearby stop went there we'd have continued to go further afield.

We don't drive but manged three kids prior to move her via buses trains and walking just didn't think about it planned it out and did it. I think once moved here there was stuff locally and my confidence was knocked and DH was around much more - and without realising my confidence in my ability to get about waned.

I really do think it's a confidence thing - more you do more routine it gets and less an a daunting prospect it is.

How old are they both?

One is four tomorrow! And one is 18 months in a couple of weeks.

Took my four everywhere as had no family
Nearby to help this included taking them away on holiday.
they are children not nuclear reactors.
You just crack on.

18 months is a tricky age isn't it as you get the buggy / walking refusal and running off.
If it's a real struggle for you stick to soft play and the park for a little bit.
What about play groups and the library?

Yes we do stuff like that, I guess they’re just at funny ages where the older one is a bit old for toddler activities too.

I time the youngest ones naps to be in the car or if we’re out all day I’ll get them to sleep in the carrier when we’re walking around.

I have more holiday than my partner so take them on trips and days out but yes I would check with him if it was something expensive or unusual/special that I thought he might like to join on so we could postpone it to a time where we could all go. I have no problem going on my own with them places and have been on multiple holidays alone with them. In some ways it was easier at your stage as I could plan the day around nap time and get some time to myself but equally now they are slightly older it is nice to go out without it all being planned so carefully around food and sleep. I guess I managed it with a detailed plan and routine and it was actually easier to do that alone than get another adult (who hates planning anything) to agree to the schedule

Mine are a bit closer in age though which probably helped

We'd take a light weight pushchair - don't drive - and it it was needed it was there and if not could be used for bag and coats. We also did pack packs with reins and they all knew to stay close to pushchair or me if they were old enough to not have that.

We did Sealife center so train and bus for us at time - or a private open to public for fee garden park place in same city - or child friendly museums - science open air one - lots of snacks. Theme parks were more when DH was around. It depends what there is locally and what they both tolerate.

It will depend on the temperament of the kids mine were used to going out locally with just me and knew if they didn't behave on train or bus we'd have long walk back and if they didn't when eating we'd often leave - so they were pretty well behaved bulk of the time - I did know some of their peers who I don't think I'd have coped as well with on outings.

I never have - and my children are 10 and 7.

Not because I'm a delicate little flower and couldn't possibly manage alone, but simply because we are a two parent family who both enjoy days out and holidays with the children, so would hate to miss something big and fun.

The children don't miss out, we still do the things we want to do, we just do them when we can do them together, which is very easy for us as DP is self employed so can work around my annual leave.

It doesn't mean that we are housebound when he's at work or off doing something at the weekend, it just means that we do more general activities as a 3 - arcades, dog walks, parks, local museums, libraries, lunches, beach etc.