To think it’s uncommon to both work full time with small kids?

[workingFTM]

I’m on maternity leave and thinking about my options for how many hours I’ll do when I return. Among those I know pretty much everyone is back part time after having a baby. Would you say it’s the same among those you know? In all families with young kids that I know, at least one parent has some kind of flexible working arrangement and if they don’t then family usually do all or some of the childcare. It’s a balance as I want max time off with my baby first and foremost but equally want to make sure I keep my foot in the door career wise for all sorts of reasons.

Most people I know have one partner, usually the woman, working PT. We are technically FT but I'm very flexible so e.g. often work in evenings after bedtime and weekends to have extra time with my DD. I do think it's quite unusual to both work FT.

Nct circle all went back very fast, my normal friends took at least 2 years out, that was a good decade ago all working ft time now and with no issues.

Actually two are still sahm but others back to work no
Issues

In my circle is completely normal to return full time when the babies are 9 months old. I only work part time (both DC have complex SN and couldn't have coped full time) but I am much of an exception. I have to admit I personally don't know a single SAHP (apart from friends with disabled DC but I would describe them as carers).

feel really sorry for the parents these days and all the juggling they have to do.

I find comments like this really irritating and a bit patronising.

They take as read that no one (or specifically no women) really wants to work.

Some of us have worked really hard to build a career. I didn’t have a choice in the matter as a single parent but I have a good life and financial independence and don’t need people feeling sorry for me thanks.

Just looked it up on the ONS website, most common (when youngest child is under 18) is both parents working full time, but when youngest child is under 5 the most common arrangement is a man working full time and the parter working part time.

My ideal would be both parents doing a 4 day week. Currently I do 4, and DH does 5. It would be nice to have a bit more time for the kids/house/hobbies.

Most people where I'm from are sahm until they start school, low income area.

It doesn't matter if it's usual or not, it's a personal decision. I wanted to be with my children when they were small but then again I have always liked being around children ; doing crafts, playing games etc. While a friend who had hers at the same time as mine said she'd rather shoot herself in the foot than being a sahm so hers (much loved) children went to nursery while she worked. So I would say it's a question of who you are. Also, some claim childcare is so expensive that it's worth staying home while some claim they can't afford not to work so there is that as well to take into consideration.

Not normal where I am, just assumed/expected I’d go part time after one child. Went back full time and most women around me are thought I was mad, and didn’t hesitate to tell me that.