To ‘be more Mumsnet’ in 2025?

[Jumell]

I’m going to try and achieve some of these goals in 2025:-

Earn 100k pa at least
Move to Hampstead
Buy a Range Rover
Shop only at Boden
BAN the Daily Fail
Have 101 on Speed Dial
Get a ring doorbell

NEVER open front door except by prior appointment

Diet and then NEVER thereafter exceed a BMI of 20

Get tested for neurodiversity

Make a whole cooked chicken last a week
Massive salad

Go NC with my ENTIRE narcissistic family

Book a spa day

Get rid of my toilet brush

Chronicle daily how little I’m eating to keep my BMI permanently under 20

Encourage all woo threads as it fascinates me - generally - be more ‘woo’

Declare friendship groups as too much drama

SO C’MON!! There are worse goals for 2025 to have, surely?

Ok genuinely lol’d at this one !!

I bet if you live in Hampstead you don’t earn 100k and nor do your neighbours 😂 unless you bought about 20 years ago!

With Real Butter

Hard as it might be to believe I don't earn that much ( less). Neighbours no idea, lots are retired.
But them I also don't drive a 4x4 ( or anything- I walk or get the public transport). Not do I do daily exercise in my lulu lemon attire or have a ring doorbell or intercom. Can't stand the keeping up with the Joneses that goes on.

I would certainly do this in an ideal world !

Let's not forget to theme everything.
Only real mumsnetters can do this.

Themed parties, both children's and adults
Themed Christmas decorations
Themed night out
Etc
Etc

Answer every thread that starts “has anyone been to this hotel/bought something from this shop/worked for this company” etc etc with: “No, I haven’t”. Cheers for your useful contribution, not, Brenda!

Also, when someone posts about something a famous person has done (got married, had a baby, died, etc) post a reply “who is this person?” Because you think it makes you look cool and edgy that you don’t watch Eastenders or listen to commercial radio and don’t know who these people are. But you spend all day on MN. Sure, Jan.

Loving the Brenda and the Sure, Jan!

Ab yes, very rural. In other words no Lidl for 10 miles. But you absolutely must not drive. You must be the public transport martyr and take 6 buses and 5 trains and then walk 8.7 miles uphill every time you need a pint of milk.

Liberal and be very vocal about anyone making snide remarks about working class people.

But if your 20 year old child announces they’re going to live on a council estate - be like

Be an avid reader who devours books

You'll also need to LTB.

I'm shocked to see that no one has said yet that they are going to cancel the cheque.......

I thought friendship groups are the bees knees for mumsnetters and their girls drinks
Also they are very very NT
Also the majority live in terraces

Don’t expect any grandparent childcare

they’ve raised their family , DONCHA KNOW!

I already do that with Reform voters so no change there!

This surprises me as I would assume Reform is more popular with MNetters!

Make sure you have a CF friend, CF neighbour, CF MIL, CF co-worker and CF school run mum to provide sheer entertainment for us all

Or if they want to be involved with your little family, shun them because “they’ve had their turn”. And you’re allowed “boundaries” but they’re not entitled to any.

🤣

Feign ignorance about any term or phrase you perceive as being "foreign".

" Pre-School? Whatever is that? We don't have that here. Can't imagine what you could possibly be referring to; you've completely lost me. Before the existence of modern schooling perhaps? Are you....American? You do know this is a UK forum, do you not?"

This must be done while channeling your best Violet Crawley..."What is a weekend?"

I am still so confused as to what the story is with toilet brushes!

Regarded generally on MN as completely unnecessary household item and one that causes more problems than solves

Apparently they’re filthy and shouldn’t be allowed through the door, yet some MNers reckon they put them in the dishwasher. Go figure.

Oh and OP, if there's a less than perfect man in your life, don't forget to LTB

Oh my word !!!! 😮