Should she replace it?

[Langarg]

My friend asked if she could borrow my Dyson airwrap for her wedding as money was tight and she couldn’t afford a hairdresser. It was a small wedding with only her, her DH and two witnesses. I reluctantly agreed (bit of a people pleaser).

The wedding was two weeks ago, we exchanged a few messages back and forth the day after her wedding. A few days later I asked if she could please return my airwrap and she didn’t reply. I messaged again saying I really need it back as I don’t have a hair dryer anymore and solely use this to dry/style my hair and she eventually replied saying she accidentally left it in the hotel however the hotel are claiming it wasn’t left there.

She was very apologetic however didn’t offer to replace it or give me the money for it. I raised this with her and explained that I shouldn’t be left without my airwrap or out of pocket for her mistake and she said that she couldn’t afford to replace or give me the money for it. She then sent me a link to a post on Facebook marketplace of someone selling an older model for £150 and said that if I buy that she can pay me back in 3 monthly instalments.

I don’t want to accept this because firstly why should I be out of pocket £150 and risk not being paid back and I don’t want an older model when I had the newer one which cost me nearly £500 less than a year ago.

I explained this to her and she said she is going to be forced to put a brand new one on her credit card which will put her in to debt. I feel awful but I really don’t know what to do?!

Please give me some advice…

YABU = buy the £150 older model and hope she pays the 3 monthly instalments
YANBU = accept her offer of her buying a replacement on her credit card

Even if she was 100% genuine, she had left it and was honestly struggling for money

surly a good person would have come to you as soon as the mistake happened, kept you fully informed and let you know how she was going to sort it out . Even if it was paying back in bits

I wouldn’t have made a detective

Surely she wouldn’t steal it then show up with fabulous hair the next time we meet?!

Absolutely not, because if she's as skint as she's saying she'll have flogged it.

You'll get your answer when you call the hotel and they have absolutely no idea what you're talking about.

Brilliant! The only person on earth who could condone this bonkers behaviour is, well, the bride😅

She’s a keen MN user and I see this is a trending thread so I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s read it.
So she is the 1% who thinks you‘re unreasonable?
i also think that she wants to keep the Dyson.

I would also contact the hotel directly, ask her where it was left or could have been left and call.

And if you are reading, OPs friend, you need to do the right thing, and not mug your friend off after being so generous.

I think I will do as previous posters have said and contact my friend saying that I’m going to contact the hotel regarding this in the hope that she magically finds it.
She’s a keen MN user and I see this is a trending thread so I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s read it.

I hope she does see it @Langarg ! The CF has been outed - once you drag the replacement out of her, or the original magically turns up, you can block her, forget her, and stick with your real friends.

She obviously thought it was so good she stole it. I’d not settle for a second hand one (who knows if it’s faulty) or an old model. This is her problem and she needs to solve it right away.

It's not your fault she lost it but yes you shouldnt have given it to her given her history!

I hope she has seen it.

She needs to learn a lesson from this.

What an inconsiderate arsehole. I would demand she puts it on her credit card and buys you a replacement new one.
The absolute bloody cheek of people. Don’t get the marketplace one OP. I once bought a curling iron off there and on closer inspection it was all scratched and broke shortly afterwards.

BTW - I'm not on "Team Stole It".

I'm most definitely on "Team I've taken advantage of my friend and now I'm having to pay the price"

You did a nice thing for someone you thought was a friend, she was a user though and now you know.

She’s lying about leaving it and also about having to put it on a credit card. She’s just got married, she will have probably been given cash gifts.
Ask her to transfer the £500 to you.

For good or bad some people are nice and/or apply that to others. Mostly it's correct but some people take liberties with that trust/friendship.

Not that I expect you'll get it, but I'd also want the money for a replacement rather than one she'd sourced "on her credit card"

After all what's to stop her buying one of the many fakes and palming you off with rubbish?

I'm also in team she has still got it/stole it. Ring the hotel and ask. I's not something tiny like a phone charger that you may well leave in a hotel - it's a big piece of kit!

She needs to replace it properly OP - none of this paying you back in installments malarkey. She might pay you one £50 and then conveniently forget the rest - you've mentioned her form! She needs to get out her credit card.

She’s lying! She’s kept it for herself

The nicer you are, the more some people take advantage.

Hats off to the op. I aspire to be more like you.
lending something to someone who has form, then posting about them on a forum you know they read. i love it.

I'm Team She's A Tea Leaf.

I wouldn't warn her that you are thinking of calling the hotel. I would call, get the names of those I spoke to and be chirpy, breezy and polite and say oops, perhaps there's been a misunderstanding.

Then when she bullshits about the hotel you can say that when you spoke to the hotel they knew nothing about it. Or maybe they do?

Either way, she is responsible for replacing with a new one or giving you the money so you can replace it.

I would also look into how to make a claim via the small claims court, and have that in my back pocket.

Well, if she is reading it, I hope she clocks that out of about 1500 voters, 99% want the cheeky fucker to replace it with a new one!

They’re huge things. I don’t believe for a second she forgot it.

I would make a small claim against her. My wedding photographer wouldn’t send me all of my photos (package I paid for) so I claimed against her. She ignored letters, questionnaires and ended up with a summons to complete the paperwork in court. I got the debt attached to her employment which must’ve been embarrassing. It escalated to the point she couldn’t pay me back quick enough and she racked up the debt further by ignoring me. I wish you luck OP.
www.citizensadvice.org.uk/law-and-courts/legal-system/small-claims/making-a-small-claim/

she said she is going to be forced to put a brand new one on her credit card which will put her in to debt
Then that is what she has to do.
I think phoning the hotel is a good idea. Not sure why you would have to tell her that is what you are going to do.

This ! Beyond cheeky to expect you to buy some well used older model off Facebook.

She lost it, she needs to replace it. The only one who could control this was her and she wasn’t arsed to look after it. Consequences