To think you get your 'spark' back post menopause?

[SlB09]

I'm stuck. Stuck in the perimenopausal everything feels flat, my body and mind are following their own tune right now, UTTER RAGE and generally a horrible person esp to my husband which I feel terrible for.

Do you get 'you' back once all this settles down?!

Lots of women can’t have HRT, I’m one of them as I’ve had hormone positive breast cancer. I’m coming out of the other side now. Among other things, the realisation that my husband has been incredibly supportive while I have been a bit of a twat to him has definitely strengthened my love for him. And the fact that he rather enjoys my current, ‘don’t give a feck’ incarceration helps too.

I’m 52 and I feel fine. Sleep was a bit dodge for a while but seems to be improving (I was expecting this as pregnancy have me insomnia). No weight gain, life seems pretty much the same except no periods.

I feel better than them my pre menopause self, but that's largely due to being older and wiser I think.

Forgot to mention that I don’t take HRT

’incarceration”? I meant incarnation!

Me either but HRT has saved my life. No exaggeration.

I think the issue with contraception is that it’s adding extra hormones on top of your regular ones, but once they start declining and you’re replacing them then it just gets you back to being you again.

Definitely give it a try if you’re struggling. I weighed up all the pros and cons and decided that the risks of taking it were worth the small increased risk of eg breast cancer, as I just felt my life wasn’t worth living at that point. Obvs time will tell if I still feel that way in the future, but for now, to have my mental health, some semblance of energy and my libido back have made me enjoy my life again. And that’s priceless.

What does 'out the other side' of menopause mean?

There is this misconception that your hormones go a bit haywire for a few years, then settle down back to normal.

They don't. Estrogen does not come back.

Yup I'm post menopausal and will be till I die. There is no other side apart from that one!

So is this it? I wonder suicide rates for women go through the bloody Roof at 50.

I hope so. I suffer from horrendous pms and feel like now I’m peri I’m living in what used to be my luteal nightmare phase. I think the only time of my life my hormones have been my friend was when I was pregnant. Am hoping post menopause I return to something akin to that blissful, balanced state. Nobody spoilt it for me.

Post menopause is permanent! Nothing regulates oestrogen deficiency except HRT. No "out the other side", just "get used to it".

OP read up on it FGS!

Well I have found that - probably as a result of the hormones stabilising post menopause - actually this is a lot better than the changing years // run up to menopause

Yes, the mood levelling has been great. Physically not so good but at 60 I think you have to accept that has more to do with age than hormones. So much focus is on how wonderful HRT is but I only experienced improved moods and no hot flushes. The aches and pains just carried on. However Magnesium, B12 and vitamin D are a game changer. I take them until I can function physically then have a break. I know when to start taking them again when I start to creak and grown.
I had to go cold turkey with HRT when I was diagnosed with breast cancer but contrary to all the bad advice I had very little side effects. I take Anastrazole which now blocks any hormones I had left and I’m fine. The aches and pains can be horrendous when my magnesium levels drop but improve rapidly when I start taking it again.
I miss my hormones but they may kill me and I want to be around a little longer.

For me, menopause has hit FAR worse than perimenopause. It’s not like you stop having periods and then everything is perfect. In fact it was about ten months after my last period that everything really kicked off: brain fog, memory loss, restless leg, night sweats, fatigue, aching joints… Two years on and I’m still really struggling, even with HRT.

Nope. Hasn't entirely worked for me. HRT didn't cure my irritation, of people who just don't do their jobs properly.

Like when I'm chasing 3 different nhs dept's who lose referrals, don't chase and send things, prescriptions sent 3 times that just don't arrive. Some excusable, some is just poor admin, a couple have been blatant lies.

Is HRT gonna solve that?

You get new issues after menopause such as vaginal atrophy, which is very common. I am on pessary HRT for it, so it is better than it was, but not totally normal.

Same, but transdermal HRT fine.

But do you continue to feel bad, is the question I think? I don't, other than the impact of normal ageing. By which I mean I'm slower, stiffer, heavier etc. But also happy, well balanced, active, enjoying life. To be fair, I had a very early menopause, didn't really realise it till it was over, and didnt really find it too bad. Though I know others do. Also did not do HRT. So probably no one size fits all, from peri to post menopause.

Im 52 and in surgical menopause due to having my ovaries and tubes taken out due to having colon cancer, which spread to my right ovary. I’m fine and I’m cancer free now. Although the oncologist says I can take HRT as it’s perfectly safe for me as my cancer wasn’t hormonal, I was very reluctant. Now the menopause has hit the fan and I’m feeling awful with the symptoms, aching joints, hips, hot sweats, itchy genitals, brain fog, sore breasts. I’m seriously considering HRT now. I’m on venlaflaxine for hot flushes, but they aren’t helping, although they have calmed my mood down.

Exactly, there is no one size fits all. My friend and I stayed the same pre menopause, during menopause, and after menopause - and we didn't take HRT. Like you I'm a bit slower and stiffer, (but not heavier).

Some people suffer dreadfully, others just sail through it, so no two experiences are going to be the same.

Hi can I ask what dose of vitamins u take please if that's allowed on here and also which kind of magnesium?

Keep going with the HRT. I think some people give up early thinking it’s not working but they either haven’t given it long enough or they’re not on a high enough dose.

It took me about a year to feel significantly better.

Also interested to know how much magnesium to take? Thanks!

I will, thank you. I’m just getting to the point where I’m not even sure it’s menopause related. I’m so congested all the time I wonder if it’s allergies. But I have a steroid inhaler and take fexofenadine every day. Nothing helps. It’s genuinely taken part of my personality away.

if it weren’t for my DC I don’t know where I’d be right now.