Shared disability toilets with baby changing facilities

[MobilityCat]

Yesterday, I found myself in an embarrassing and upsetting situation when I crapped myself while waiting outside the disabled toilet. A mum was inside, chatting and cooing to her baby while changing its nappy. While I completely understand that she needed a suitable place to change her baby, I couldn’t help but wonder: why does it have to be in the one facility specifically designed for the disabled? Why can't the baby changing facilities be located in the women's toilet or have a separate dedicated room for this purpose?

Don’t people talk to their babies whatever speed they’re changing a nappy?

Would it be accessible?

Not necessarily. I chat/coo to my baby while changing her nappy, it keeps her occupied and stops her from trying to roll/crawl away mid-change which actually makes the changing process much quicker than me trying to silently wrestle her into a nappy while she’s trying to escape.

I think there's also a terminology thing here. When I go out they're almost anyways 'accessible toilets' not 'disabled'. To those with disabilities they think they're one and the same. But lots of people need a toilet with a large floor space.

Yes it includes people with wheelchairs etc. It also includes people with pushchairs. They don't fit in a normal stall and you can't exactly leave your baby outside so you have to use the accessible toilet. Same with room for baby change table, pram etc.

Accessible toilets are for people who need space, it's not specifically a queue jumping exercise. Should there be more? Yes. But businesses are reluctant to give up more space for toilets, taking away space they can make money from.

I quite understand that she needed to use the space. My question was why it needs to be combined with the disabled toilet. Adding to that she appeared to be taking her time about it, but that may have felt longer because I had an urgent need to crap.

She didn't do anything wrong if that's where the only baby changing table was. When my children were babies the only public baby changers were nearly always in the disabled toilets. There was nothing I could do about it.

Why does talking/singing to her baby mean that she was taking longer? It doesn't. I often used to talk/sing to mine when changing them because it kept them calmer and meant I could get the nappy change done faster.

I'm sorry you went through this. I have IBS myself and it can certainly cause accidents. I do understand how you must have felt. I wouldn't say that this was the other woman's fault though. Complain to your local council about the poor provision of proper facilities, and maybe to your MP.

Completely agree with you OP. Need more facilities as standard.

An accessible toilet is specifically designed to accommodate people with disabilities, so we have the necessary space and facilities to use the toilet comfortably and safely. The design of accessible toilets follows very specific standards to meet the needs of wheelchair users, and people with mobility issues. Quite often there isn't even provision for someone who has a colostomy bag.

Oh don't be obtuse. 🙄

@AgnesX

Oh don't be obtuse. 🙄

I wasn't, you can't tell. However OP clarified and I posted immediately after the comment you have quoted to acknowledge it.

Not at all. Disabled facilities need proper, disability friendly, changing facilities. These would be perfect r for a parent wanting to change a disabled child and far more appropriate than baby changing facilities for someone with an older child who needs changing.

I don't expect that the "accessible" toilet will always be unoccupied, just like any other toilet. My concern was just that it was combined with baby changing.

I’m sorry this happened to you and as a man who often finds himself in the disabled loo changing a nappy, I always try to be as quick as possible

The answer to the question ‘why do they need to be combined’ is that a lot of places were built when the requirement to provide accessible toilets and space for men to change nappies wasn’t a consideration and so businesses are struggling to add in those facilities with limited space to play with

In an ideal world no they should not be combined. Baby changing should have its own room. Sadly not all places have the space or the inclination to do this.
It's not fair as lack of disabled toilets is awful.

I wish I hadn't mentioned the cooing, so many are fixating on it. I just wished that that baby changing was elsewhere.

But why was that a concern? The baby change has to go somewhere? If it wasn’t in the accessible toilet it would most likely have to go in the men’s or the women’s, which would likely make it inaccessible for many disabled parents or for disabled children requiring it. I appreciate that in an ideal world there would be space to have an accessible toilet plus an accessible baby change facility plus separate men’s and women’s facilities but the reality is most places won’t have room for this. The only issue I can see is if having the baby change facilities in the accessible toilet stops them being accessible, for example if there is a changing table which takes up floor space so doesn’t leave enough room to turn a wheelchair or if the changing table obscures the grab rails etc. Your only issue seems to be that having the baby changing space in there is that it means the facility is busier and so there may be a queue, but it should be expected that sometimes there will be a need to queue for public facilities.

YANBU and you are right they should be separate. If changing a nappy with poo it is faster if you chat with the baby because otherwise they try to grab things or turn over. If you talk to them it sometimes distracts them and makes it faster. So just because she was chatting doesn’t mean she was going slowly.

I know, right?! Because hanging out in any loo is always fun.

When my children were babies they often ended up covered in poo and needing a full clothing change. Nothing quick about that.

Unfortunate for you, but another disabled person in there could have slowed you down too, how many disabled loos should places have, and how many nappy changes? Each space is another table lost and lost profit and ultimately there needs to be a balance so that they provide what you need but also have enough space for everyone else. Given baby change and disabled loos also need to be on the ground floor for buggies and wheelchairs multiple spaces come at a cost.

You're right, places shouldn't combine the accessible toilets with the baby changing facilities. Sadly many do because they're just concerned about providing the absolutely bare minimum and not really bothered about the people who have to use them. I'm astonished anyone would have an issue with the concept that there should be separate spaces for these, i suspect it's people getting defensive because the woman changing her baby hadn't done anything wrong given its not her fault they're combined.

So what are the baby changing facilities in many “disabled loos” for then?

Certainly shouldn’t just be in the women’s toilets! Dads change nappies too!

Unfortunately this is just one of those things due to space constraints.

My youngest is 11, and people used to breastfeed in the disabled toilet... is that still a problem?

People just don't think.

Just stick a fold down baby change table on the wall in the male and female toilets. Done!

Disabled toilets should not be random so called 'accessible' spaces. Disabled people need them and don't get me started on the lack of disabled toilets with hoists in them.

That's not the point is it though? I'm not disabled, I have a baby, it's hard to be quick and it is bonkers that someone who may need to use the toilet (and only that toilet) has to wait for me to change my baby and go to the loo myself before I come out.

OP YANBU.

(Worse is the able-bodied men who use a disabled loo for a quiet shit)