To use the kids Christmas money to get me through January?

[darkmorning]

In a way I don’t know why I’m asking as I don’t have a choice really, but if the overall consensus is absolutely not I suppose I can use a credit card or something.

PIL gave both children £50 for their savings accounts. I’d have to put the cash in my bank account and transfer to their savings accounts: plan is to do this after I’ve been paid in January. Should I? Or is this just horrible?

I’ve already said but you may have missed it since you’ve had at least two usernames banned on this thread.

@darkmorning really well constructed answer 😂
Yeah I 100% wouldn't approach debt in the way you do.
But I don't have any debt , so yeah use your kids money.

Ach op, I feel sad for you. No you didn’t say your finances were a mess, but you are in such a dire situation you can’t afford to feed the kids or fuel your car without actually taking the kids Xmas money, or using a credit card and getting into more debt. That’s a tough spot to be in. Very tough.

shouting you don’t want financial advice or folks to comment on your marriage is pointless, of course people will., when you post something like this .

I hope things get easier for you. I’m sure they will, and that this is the last Xmas you need to resort to something like this. Good luck.

I really wish people would read the full thread.

Maybe it’s not a well constructed answer but it’s honest at least; but actually you’re right and everyone would probably be better off without me. I’m a shit, useless waste of space , I get it. Thanks.

And I’m not shouting, I used capitals once, because one poster in particular was getting really annoyed with me. The savings are done now; Christmas is done now, not going on NYE will make precisely no difference to anything, now for gods sake some of you quit with the pile on. This is why I’ve tried to give minimal information, I KNEW I’d end up hating myself and I do.

I think you're handling all these responses marvellously @darkmorning .

FWIW, I used my children's savings a few times to cover bills. We had a massive amount of debt that it felt like a mountain to climb. Some months pasta and chopped tomatoes kept us going.

And yet, I still put a bit away for the children each month.

They were given control of those savings aged 18. Both were grateful beyond words for the nest egg they've been given. The eldest is using it as a stimulus to save for a house deposit, and he's added over £15k to it already. The youngest has tucked hers away in a high interest account with limited access so that she doesn't spend it on uni life.

Know what I'm grateful for? That I became a member of the MSE forum in 2004. It was such a helpful and friendly place where people listened rather than judged. I miss those old days where it was small and Martin would interact with the forum.

So keep what you're doing. Your plan sounds like it's thought through and your end date feels very close. I wish you luck with achieving your goal by Easter. Here's to no more short months 🥂

Enjoy your family time with your in laws.

Oh my, no one said this op, not even slightly.

maybe hide the thread or ask for it to be deleted.

I have read it.

Now your playing the victim.
When did I say you were shit or a waste of space?

*you're not your

Don't let things get on top of you OP, don't put yourself down, you know what is really going on in your life, no one here does.

Do you really think you couldn't use a credit card responsibly? It seems that's what you're saying, so of course people will offer advice. If the kids hadn't been given cash, what would you have done until pay day?

It seems like you're in a mess now and can't weather even a very small storm. You're not prioritising the most important financial demands. Distracting yourself with slowly building up savings for your kids' future isn't improving your situation.

OP please don't try to make some of us feel guilty for trying to offer financial advice. Using emotional blackmail when you don't like what's being said is poor form.

If you had stated very very clearly at the start you didn't want advice, fair enough. Or, better to use your own values than ask here.

But it's very hard to hold back when we read of a woman needing advice.

@darkmorning why the venom at me?
How am I a "bitch" because you can't handle money? That's on you

Oh if you’re feeling guilty, good. Because you should feel guilty. You refused to accept me saying I wasn’t looking for financial advice, made out my children were suffering and then got angry when I refused to do as I was ‘told.’ So if you’re feeling bad? Good. Because you’ve made ME feel bad. You’re not helping. Just leave it. What you want is to throw your arms around dramatically and declare that you’ve tried, the OP just won’t listen … well don’t!

That was a bitchy comeback, and you know it was.

Personally I would be cancelling the 80 mile round trip!

Heavier spending months are hard, ours are December, March, and August with not much recover time in between. But you really need to plan better if your considering spending your kids Christmas money.

Nope. It wasn't.
You sound very petulant.
Name calling is always helpful .
I'm not putting on a face and pretending everything is fine like you are .
As I said no debt here or credit cards

It would be interesting to know how many of the sanctimonious posters have had financial help from their families.

Some of the most odious people I know in real life who like to lecture people about finances were never weaned off their families financial teats! These financial sucklings are so repulsive as adults.

@CaptainCabinetsTrappedInCabinets i know you would, and I’m afraid I can’t really do this without a massive family row which I’m trying to avoid. It isn’t a safe space for me on here and I’ve got some posters being very unpleasant, as well as a repeatedly returning troll. So I’m just not getting into the intricate details of my marriage. Or wider picture of my finances.

@Purgepossessions2025 Odd thing to speculate on. It often works the other way- people brought up in poverty or with relatively poor parents learn to be careful with their own money early on. Nothing to do with being sanctimonious, but life's hard lessons at an early age.

I rest my case😂

It is not speculative I know the people I am referring to.

I wonder, I wonder. Did you have financial help from your family?