How much easier my life would be if I just sent my DD to the local state primary

[abgah]

At the moment she's at a private primary school.

The local state primary in my village is within walking distance.. it has an ofsted ' good ' rating.

The class size is of course 30 children per class. In DDs private primary, there are 15 children per class.

We made the decision to send her to private school because we thought she'd massively benefit from smaller class size and will enjoy better facilities.

But it's such a stress to send her there, mainly because it's 30 minutes away due to traffic really. I leave the house before 8 and I'm not back until after 9 in the mornings and the same in the evenings. It's absolutely exhausting.

I have recently started a job working from the office and getting back to pick her up is very stressful. My every day is massively stressful. I pay someone to drop her off on the mornings I go to work in the office but I do all the pickups.

It's just a huge stress but she's really thriving and loves her school so much. This is not even considering the huge financial burden it is on us to send her there.

I just keep going past the local primary school and thinking, is this going to be something I look back on and regret ? It's such a huge stress on us. I hope it will be worth it.

She goes to one of the through schools and we chose it for that reason, so she can stay on for secondary school more easily.

Are any parents in similar positions or have been in similar positions ? We really are just trying to do the best for her, no matter what the sacrifice. Like all parents are.

Terminology is used very loosely these days. Back in ye olden 1970s, Cambridge city and county was an early adopter of the comprehensive system. The city had 4 grammar schools - 2 for girls and 2 for boys. Additionally, there were 2 private senior schools that creamed off the best 11 plus passes - one girls, one boys. They were also few paying schools with their own entrance arrangements for the rest of their pupils.

These schools Perse Boys and Perse Girls still exist with slightly altered names and are both co ed. The main entry is at 11. The former boys school goes right down to nursery level on various different sites. They call the junior years 3-6 a prep school. The former girls school has also expanded on various sites, but they term their years 3-6 a junior school.

There a a variety of independent school settings in Cambridge. The only other combination with strong links is St Faith's and The Leys. St Faith's does Pre Prep and Prep and The Leys does senior. Main cohort of the Leys year 9 up. The year 7s are mainly a few from state schools and a few boarders generally from outside the uk.

My DC's non selective Private school has the word "Grammar" in its name.

Like the 11plus in state schools you do the exam at the start of your final year of primary so kids aren’t all 11years old. The 13plus exams or just entrance exams ( as many private schools have their own exams, ours did ) are at the beginning of that final year of prep. Many schools, however, have their own entrance exams which can be at any time during that final year. For my kids senior school they did theirs in June prior to starting in September.( schools can be flexible if there’s places available ).

So it’s not really well in advance, it’s less than a the year before they start. The same as the 11plus in that respect.

Not necessarily true. My DD was in a class of 16 kids in primary all the way through to year 6. This was a state school No issues with friendships. She then went to a school that none of her classmates did. Made new friends.

OP, if you’re still around - what did you choose to do in the end? How are things working out?

My dc’s primary was rated good. It wasn’t and I do regret not taking them out but plodding along thinking it would get better. It was particularly bad for my eldest who was lost really in the bag class. She’d have thrived a lot more in private primary. So just because a school is rated good you still need to look yourself.

This is just highlighting the positives for your daughter. What about the negatives of having an extremely stretched and stressed out mum?