Am I being unreasonable being uncomfortable with the age gap of my Daughter's relationship?

[Tennis1869]

My Daughter (35F) has a boyfriend (25M).
They have been together for around 6 months and he is a lovely young man, he is a doctor which I was absolutely thrilled about.
When me and my DH met him he was visibly younger, I cannot fault him at all.
I just feel a little uncomfortable about the age gap and wonder what his parents must think of the gap.

I think if the roles were reversed me and DH would be a little concerned. I know this is not my business to interfere with as they are both happy, but I just can't help feeling uncomfortable as to me he is so visibly younger.

I would like some reassurance more than anything or advice from other's who have found themselves in the situation where your child is in a relationship with a bit of an age gap, did you find it uncomfortable and did it pass?

The doctors I know settled down quite young. I think the job itself matures men because of what they deal with in work. It will be challenging as he completes training but if they love each other and are compatible they will find a way.

Please put your feelings aside and just be happy for them.

May I please ask? What bad or negative thing do you think will arise from his being ten years younger than her?

Lol, my mum started dating my step dad when he was 25 and she was 40. They had a baby 2 years later and married the following year. Still happy together now 16 years later.

I started my relationship when he was 32 and I was 44. 12 years later we are still together.

What do you mean before you do anything else. What on earth are you thinking of doing. It’s really none of your business. It’s not like she’s 17. Stop interfering and be happy that your daughter is happy.

My main concern (that I wouldn't express to her!) Would be if she wants children. Time isn't on her side but he might not be ready for that yet, however plenty of men the same age who don't want to commit, or thst string women along and then bail when it is nearly too late for kids. So if they seem stable and happy then good for them, I hope it works out.
And if fertility isn't a concern then even less of an issue provided they are on the same page.
I'm a bit confused by you not liking him jeing 'visibly' younger. The age gap and life experience is the same, would you be happier if his face looked older?

😂 this is the best yet! Being a doctor actually means you marry later on average.

Although women can also be doctors!

My brother married at 25 to a 35 year old lady. They divorced a year later as she wanted children and he wasn't there yet. She went back to her first husband. My brother then married again at 35 to a 19 year old he got pregnant the first time he slept with her, it takes all sorts,

Both my siblings are married to someone 10 years age different to them. They were both previously married to people much closer to them in age and both marriages ended because they didn't want the same things in life. It really comes down to outlook of life and shared desires. I really would not say anything and let the relationship play out.

If he dies he dies......

As the famous quote about younger men goes

I'm 40 and DP is 60. First got together 20 years ago. Really don't understand the issue with age gaps.
Also, I am the more mature adult in the relationship, he's a child 🤣

Your daughter has got herself a lovely sounding bloke and youre still anxious about it. This is a YOU thing - nothing to do with them.

The age gap only really comes into play when one is in their 60s and the other approaching 80.

I have a slightly smaller age gap of 9 years, and we have been together for 30 years. DH was also in his 20s when we met. I really don’t understand why it is an issue ? It could be harder for your daughter as she may want children before he is ready, but other than that I don’t think it matters.

A doctor, they do get quite a bit of female attention in their working environment, especially if they are good looking. Idk op, I think he as plenty of options going forward, I would be very surprised if he stays long term.

Are you my mum? 🤣🤣

Im 35 and my boyfriend is 25. We’ve been together a few years though. He’s fabulous and very mature for his age. We live together and have a baby on the way! Hope our parents aren’t too concerned, bit late now if they are though!

When I read what the gap was, my first thought was 'young stud'. Is it the fact this might just be a sex thing for her that makes you uncomfortable? It's understandable if so, it can't be an easy thought.

Are you sure you’re more worried about what his parents think? Or are you just projecting? If your daughters happy, you should be happy too.

DH is 9 years younger than me and we've been together 15 years. I don't even notice the age gap, I feel like we're the same age.

I have just turned 36 and my husband is 25. We have just had a baby. Our relationship is as close to perfect as you can get- we adore each other, he is my best friend and my favourite person in the world.

His whole family have welcomed me with open arms.

Also I have dated a couple of doctors...never again! I'm happy with my boring 25 year old accountant 😄

I met dh when he was 20 me 30,it was only supposed to be a “fling”,we have been together 14 years,married for 7,2 dc’s,he is more mature than me.

He's a doctor, so he's obviously an intelligent bloke and he will have some insights into how the female body works. I assume that your daughter is aware of this too. So they will presumably both be aware that, if she wants children, she will need to have them sooner rather than later. Why not credit them both with the ability to navigate this issue for themselves, in whatever way they see fit?

My post says 'the doctors I know'. They may not represent the national average but they really did settle down much younger than many of our peers. And of course women can be doctors in fact they often married male doctors or physios etc My point was that the male doctors I knew were more mature in many ways than other early to mid twenty-something men. This made sense when they were dealing with life and death long before many of us.