Xmas day morning - AIBU here?

[HennyPenny42]

Staying at my parents’ house for Christmas with dp and dd (3), my sister is also here.
Sat around on Xmas Eve chatting about the order of the day tomorrow. I assume my dd will wake early (6ish) and I’m happy for her to have her stocking when she wakes up. I said ‘oh, she’ll probably have everyone up as she’ll be excited and want to show you all what she’s got’. Just got a groan from df, and pointed silence from dm and dsis said ‘she can show me stuff but I’m not getting up’. So if they have their way it’ll be me and dp getting up with dd to do stocking and them emerging 2/3 hours later.
AIBU to think that this is slightly mean spirited on Christmas Day?
They would never dream of letting us having a lie in by taking dd in the morning normally (obviously wouldn’t want that in Xmas day as I want to be there!) and refuse to get up before 8 when we come to stay, even if we’re up for ages before then. My dp’s mum would be so excited to get up with us and dd on Christmas morning and open her stocking. Am I making a bit deal out of nothing? I just feel a bit disappointed by my family but maybe I need to accept that other people just aren’t going to be as interested/excited about my kid as I would like! What would your Xmas morning routine be with your wider family?

I won't get up for my own kids at 6am. Yabu

Your parents got up with you OP, they don’t want to do it with someone else’s kid - even if it’s yours!
I know I wouldn’t!

Christmas morning is for you, DD and DH. You can’t expect family members to be up at 6am to see YOUR child open her presents. Surely she can just show them her presents when they all wake up?! Don’t send her in to wake them all up FFS.

I don’t think you can expect anyone but the parents of small children to be up at 6 am on Christmas morning - it’s a pretty hellishly early time!

Maybe your MIL is a morning people but for most people that’s still firmly nighttime. I think if they’re willing to get up as early as 8 that’s a pretty fair compromise.

I certainly don’t expect my 10 yo to wake up before 8 tomorrow as I normally have a job to shake him awake at that time!

Everyone is different . What I don’t get is why are you staying there . ? Why do they want you there ….? And why not stay at dmil if it all works better the way you would like ?

If my kids were grown up I wouldn’t want to be up at 6am .

Perfect plan!

Yes YABU

No one wants to get up at 6am to watch a kid open stocking presents except doting parents.

Your family is right. They can see main presents opening at a civilised hour.

No way is it reasonable to expect your parents and sister to get up at 6am to watch opening of presents. Surely you get up with DD and do Santa presents and they will be awake not much later and there will be other gifts for her to open presuming they but her gifts? Did you get up at 6am before you had your kids to watch other little ones open Santa presents? That's really early for older people and I can relate to their reaction completely. I mean you will have the rest of the day.

We’ve got a set of grandparents who would have been at the door before sunrise for birthdays and Christmas. The other set not so much.

Fast forward to teens and it’s switched about and the GPs who were less hands on during the younger years have been amazing during the (very, very) tricky teenage years.

I would try not to get in a flap about it.
Just have a lovely day.

Do a small stocking with dd in your room quietly, with most presents later when everyone is up. Of course you can’t get the whole household up at 6am!

There isn't a chance in hell I would let any child wake me at six that I hadn't given birth to. I would lock my door and up for breakfast at a reasonable 9am.

Why does your daughter get to wake everyone up, that's very unfair.

When you have kids in the house you get up.
Yeah, if they are your kids.

I never have and dont intend to get up for not my own kids. I have my sisters grand children staying with me and they are very young.
Kids are happy to show off their presents to siblings and me later in the day.
If I'm not working Christmas day I don't get up before 9. I do shifts all year, I may or may not work Christmas depending on my rota. I love my lie in Christmas day or not.

Yes it’s weird of them - Christmas is about kids and the magic of it all. Don’t worry about them, let them lie in their beds - have a lovely magical time just you, DP and DC and enjoy it without them!

Yes, you are being unreasonable.

They would never dream of letting us having a lie in by taking dd in the morning normally (obviously wouldn’t want that in Xmas day as I want to be there!) and refuse to get up before 8 when we come to stay, even if we’re up for ages before then

Blooding hell. Even 8am is early for me. I'm normally up before then but I need quiet and coffee before I can do human stuff.

They've been there and done it!! Leave them be!

@Holesintheground Christmas is different for different families though. For our families, it’s more of a religious celebration and seeing family and friends (parties and get-togethers).
It wouldn’t really bother me if no one wanted to see my children opening their presents.

No way I'd be getting up at 6am on Xmas day!

Ah I’m torn!

I hate being shattered on Xmas day due to the very early start. But I also wouldn’t want to miss the excitement
and magic of watching my grandchild open their presents.

Im just in bed and fully expect my two to be up at the crack of dawn - they are 11 and 14 super excited. I’m glad it’s still magical
for them, even now - although my 11 year old still believes, my 13 year old is still excited.

I'm just about to retire too. All sorted and prepared for tomorrow. Everyone else has been asleep for hours. Fuck it if they expect me up at 6am. That's their job.

I'd stay at your own house next year then you aren't disturbing them or dp's if you think they'd be more keen to be in the spirit for 3 yo

I'd stay at your own house next year then you aren't disturbing them or dp's if you think they'd be more keen to be in the spirit for 3 yo

Quite. Do all the work yourself and then see how knackered you are.

Isn’t the whole point of the stocking to have things to open before everyone else is up? Open the stocking with her at 6am, then wait until the whole family is up for main present opening later.

> refuse to get up before 8 when we come to stay, even if we’re up for ages before then

I’m a bit confused about why should they. Your waking hours are unreasonably early, not theirs.

Regarding tomorrow morning, your child is too young to understand time or care. If you really want them to watch the child open the presents then wait til everyone is up.

6am? No.