Are today's young people more childish?

[HelenInHeels]

I've noticed this a lot on public transport, trams particularly from teenagers say 15, 16 years old or thereabouts. And in town.

They seem far more childish than my friends and I were at the same age. We were wanting to be seen as grown up. Now I see a lot of squealing, shouting, shoving and pushing, yelling and behaviour I'd expect in seven year olds. Usually in mixed groups, but not always.

I was mortified if I was seen as a "child" at 15 (technically I was of course) and we were just not like this. I'd have been mortified if I'd acted like this.

Have today's young people really changed so much? I'm talking late 90s here not the 1960s!

you were never silly as a teen?
okay....

I was also one of your sensible, good grades, part time job (I was working something like 18 hours a week while doing A levels and still got the highest grades in my year), classic literature reading sixteen/seventeen year olds

At the same time when I was with a group of friends we often behaved like absolute idiots, shrieking, running around, being silly, laughing at stupid jokes, playing games, wrestling each other, etc. I remember the boys in my sixth form trying to pull each others pants down, etc. This would have been in the early 00s.

I think there's a degree of selective remembering if you honestly think you were completely mature and responsible at all times aged 15, 16, 17, etc.

I remember a lot of this kind of behaviour at school in the 90s. I wasn’t like that personally but remember seeing a lot of other students from my school and others behaving absolutely appallingly in town and on public transport. I don’t think this is anything new.

Yes, but I think every generation extends their childhood longer than the one before. I don't know what the reason for this is, but I suspect it's because most of us want our children to have better lives than we did, so we baby them more. It can be hard to get the balance right between teaching them independence and not expecting them to do absolutely everything themselves by the age of 5.

I was a teenager in the 90s and definitely remember some childish and dickish behaviour on public transport. I think sometimes we look back with rose tinted glasses.

I do think 16/17 year olds tend to have less responsibility now to an extent. I was working full time at 16.

Maybe not childish but definitely more naieve ,my son is 18 on boxing day he's celebrating by going to a gaming arcade with friends and something to eat
Hes Diabetic so im glad he's not into drinking
But when I think what I was up to at 18.there is a world of difference between us .

I thought it had gone the other way - you can't move in SpaceNK for 11 year olds trying to buy retinol and NEXT are selling crop tops for 3 year olds! I'm a late 90s baby and didn't know anything about skincare until I was 16 at least, and you'd never have seen crop tops for literal toddlers until recently.

See I'm a 70,s baby I was in pubs and clubs at 15/16 whilst I'm.not advocating this was a good thing ,it's no something you can ever imagine today's teens doing.

But 11 year olds don't have money for such stuff so therefore it must be parents encouraging this

My DS was amazed about how many of his uni intake cohort didn't seem to have a clue about the most basic stuff. Getting a train for example ( something he did from ages 11) basic cooking, using a washing machine etc

So it doesn't seem in some sectors of society that teens are more immature and less self sufficient.

But only some. Seems like the "naice" areas have far more kids restricted and timerabled to the hilt. So they don't get a chance to learn to deal with stuff themselves and gain resilience

Whereas many of the not so nice estates have the kids playing out from a young age and they are far more independent and less helicoptered

As for silliness on the bus. Well I think that's just teenage girls. I remember being about 12 and doing same sort of thing on the bus with my mates. Although we had outgrown it by. 15

I agree it's got a lot to do with the parents. I know a 7 year old whose mum says is "really into skincare and has her own routine every day" so she's buying her lots of expensive stuff for Christmas

Just say no. It's simple. I think a lot of this stuff comes from Instagram snd Tik Tok.

When we were kids we had minds of our own.

At that age I was trying to look like Natalie Imbruglia and All Saints. Spice Girls were childish rubbish I thought. Focusing on exams and studying and going out with my friends. Obsessed with makeup and nail polish.

Across all ages
you read on here about Reception children in nappies and unable to use a knife and fork or talk properly, 9 year olds having toddler tantrums, 15 year olds with no basic manners, university age young adults who come home and expect to be waited on, 25 year olds refusing to work (fortunately few).
Yes, times are changing.

Lots of them seem to be paying with cash, so I assume spending pocket money, but they wouldn't know about it at all if they didn't have unrestricted access to TikTok/Instagram etc, which most of them are too young for according to the rules of the apps.

I agree with you re teens from 'naice' areas being timetabled to the hilt, we live in a fairly 'naice' area and the teens at the big private school and local grammars don't seem to be going home until gone 5, whereas the kids at the local comp can be seen on their way home any time after 3pm most days - that's 2 hours more free time.

I remember much teenage silliness, however living in such a small community you couldn't get away with much after the age of about 13, everyone knew everyone so parents would find out if you'd been giggling/being loud outside the library/in the park and you'd be told to behave so you didn't show yourself up! 😂

I'm 45, at 14+ my friends and I had started going to local pub discos with booze as there was no ID checking then. My 26 DD and her partner rarely drink, nor most of their friends. But ID had definitely come in by that point, and by 18 they were more interested in driving places and whatnot.

I'd moved out of home by 20 with DD and was holding down a full time job, attending college part time, and raising a baby alone. But that's very much a situational event. I still went on to uni (as a mature student), but if I hadn't had a child to bring up by that point then maybe I'd have been less mature. Hard to say really.

Yes, they tease each other all the time. They are noisy, playful and outrageous all the time.
I think it is good that they keep their inner child. No need to grow up too quickly, at all.

I dont think there's anything wrong with this stage slowing down. I think for previous generations growing up was actually too rushed.

I do think it's a disservice to young people who aren't taught the basics though. I know a lot of young folk who age out of the care system, bunged into alternative accommodation, and they have zero idea how to boil an egg nevermind budget bills.

Apart from studying for your exams, nothing you describe is mature. It's, in fact, quite immature and a little insecure compared to kids who are happy looking like themselves rather than aping someone else.

I find older teens to be far more intelligent and seem to know more things than I did at that age (due to social media/internet) but they lack common sense and are behind on social skills. Not all teens but there are a larger portion who do not know how to behave in different social situations.

I reckon you're actually seeing 12 year olds, not 15 year olds! They all look much older nowadays i think - so its forcing your perspective.

Absolutely. I'm a teacher and completely astounded at some of the ridiculous shit I see every day. Some parents just don't teach their children to have an ounce of resilience in any situations.

I was travelling to and from London to work in an office when I was 16 and some of these children can't manage the simplest tasks without blubbing. I love them really, but my eyeballs must roll around in my head 10 times a day.

I don't know why you wouldn't want children to be children for longer. This is one of the first times in history children haven't been forced into wars or child labour - in the UK… I'm aware this happens in other countries before anybody misses the point entirely. Frankly, given what we now understand about development, we shouldn't be saying 15 year olds are capable of anything but behaving immaturely because they have at least 10 more years before their brain is fully developed. Forcing children to grow up quickly can make life easier for adults around them but isn't necessarily good for them, as seen with the enormous amounts of miserable people from older generation carrying huge amounts of emotional baggage and unaddressed issues.

Frankly, being selfish is a good thing. I quite like that younger generations outlook. I think healthy boundaries, putting yourself first and not letting work or partners take the piss is a only a good thing. It certainly beats being a doormat all your life.

I've seen plenty of adults shouting, shoving and pushing, yelling and some even squealing well into their 30s, 40s, and beyond. Maybe it's behaviour in general that has shifted over the years, or the perceptions of it.

I had a similar view as a teenager of hating being viewed as a child. Now I just view it as weird and funny when I get carded & as my own children have grown past those ages, I wonder how adults back then just treated me 'old enough' (exact words I heard at 15 from police having told them I hadn't seen a parent or had one in the home in three weeks).

Having three teenagers now, I have learned to not give 'when I was your age' stories, even if trying to compliment or show understanding, because it's different time and they've had much better childhoods. I view my childhood as having been on 'speed run' and I'm thrilled they can be a bit more relaxed and that both of my older children have started pensions as teenagers and have saved more from their work than I ever did at their ages. Really, I just think they're different rather than more childish.

I agree. Im not sure if its a good or bad thing. Maturity and childish are different things. Immaturity isn't a good thing and they need to live in the real world and learn responsibility etc. However I think society is a bit more accepting of the teen years being a life phase in its own right and accepts the play acting and silly humour that goes with it, they don't need to pretend to be grown up to gain respect as much as earlier generations did.

As you say you were working at 16, i have just read another thread where the OP insists her 17 year old is home by 7pm. Some parents need to learn to cut the apron strings.

Jesus, at 12 years old I was working in the Londis type store on the corner of my road from 5pm to 8pm.