Are today's young people more childish?

[HelenInHeels]

I've noticed this a lot on public transport, trams particularly from teenagers say 15, 16 years old or thereabouts. And in town.

They seem far more childish than my friends and I were at the same age. We were wanting to be seen as grown up. Now I see a lot of squealing, shouting, shoving and pushing, yelling and behaviour I'd expect in seven year olds. Usually in mixed groups, but not always.

I was mortified if I was seen as a "child" at 15 (technically I was of course) and we were just not like this. I'd have been mortified if I'd acted like this.

Have today's young people really changed so much? I'm talking late 90s here not the 1960s!

@HelenInHeels oh god yes they are! and entitled too!! have no idea how they will manage to get through real life

Was talking about this with my colleagues last night at our staff party. The answer seems to be yes! Colleague with 16 year old son says son makes dens with his friends for fun and has no interest in girls. Colleague with 18 year old daughter never goes out to pubs or clubs and just likes to stay in and have sleepovers with friends.

Kids don't drink or do anything wild anymore.

This.

My friend from school showed me her leaving book comments from when we were 17/18. Omg it's cringey and soooo immature.

I think that there's less responsibility on teens now - I know a few exceptions to this and they really stand out because of it. Stupid stuff like being able to hold a conversation with an adult and not literally fall asleep spring to mind.

It depends on the DPs as much as the teenagers. There's a lot of posters on MN who think they should be doing even basic things for their adult DC. If you won't give children the tools to become adults then they don't learn to be adults

I do think young people don't grow up/mature as quickly now but, maybe we grew up too quick in those days?

I spent my years between 16 and 19 working all the hours I could in between studying so I could save enough to get on the property ladder. Moved into my 1st house aged 20, my DH effectively left home at 16 to join the army.

My neighbour has a 17 year old daughter who shrieks and squeals like a toddler half the time, she seems terribly immature to me.

Well no, looking at mine and friend's kids. My son (21) has been living on his own since 18, though he doesn't pay rent (couldn't afford to on minimum wage) he sorts out and pays his bills/council tax/phone etc, gets dentist and GP appointments, sorts out his motorbike insurance and all that life admin stuff.
My DD (19) at uni but sorts dentist/hair/GP appointments herself and worked abroad for a month last year - food shopping/cooking/budgeting without any help. She's already networking hard and getting work experience with an eye to future employment.
My friends' kids also manage all this life admin, have flown abroad with friends or on their own for holidays, some may still live at home but they do their own laundry, cook the odd meal for the family etc.
In fact I find them all much more on the ball about work and know things i had no idea about.

People adapt with the times. Most 50 year olds are pretty different to the 50 year olds of the 1980’s.

I think young people and young adults are infantilised today. Parents doing everything for them and not teaching them life skills.

When I was 12 in the 90s, I smoked (in a desperate attempt to seem cool and less likely to be bullied) and had already been subject to several instances of 'in plain sight' crossing of sexual boundaries (being told to kiss or sit on older men's laps, being cat called by strangers etc).

I am so glad that my 12 year old isn't just being left to bring himself up and have all the upsetting experiences I did as a result of being desperate to be seen as 'mature'.

lol! In surprised he didn’t say mate I was in the army then, get a move on 🤣
Yeah I can imagine my youngest being scared but not crying and she’s 5!!

If teenagers are immature, lacking in life skills and resilience it’s not their fault.

These skills are driven by parenting.

I think in general they're far more bubble wrapped than I was as a 70s/80s child, which can lead to immaturity.

But having said that, as 'grown up' as me and my friends were at 15, when we got together in a group we'd revert to a screaming bunch of immature knob heads 😏🤣

I don't know about more "childish", but they do seem more likely to fail to launch. Caused mainly by over-protective parents who expect to know about everything their kids are doing (including the adult ones). This is how we end up with competent 18 year olds who think it's normal to ring their mum because they have a cold!

There's definitely been a big change in maturity for those in the uni years. I've got many friends who are lecturers and the stories I hear from them are mind blowing.

They seem to constantly have parents on the phone getting involved in the minutiae of their child's life, some parents stay in a hotel for Freshers week so they can be down the road to support. Lecturers are having students come to them crying about their boyfriend/girlfriend or a row they've had with friends. Absolutely wild.

The pre-covid/post-covid distinctions have got to be psychological. How would a few weeks of home schooling have affected a generation's behaviour? Come on now.

I was horrified recently at FiL's funeral that two nieces aged 23 and 29 started giggling when the priest started singing. That's behaviour I'd expect from 8 year olds, not grown women.

I go to the gym and there are some teenage girls who come in and just act like arses the whole time - pushing each other off treadmills, running to and from machines, constantly filming each other pouting into their phones whilst doing something else stupid. I despair

I think there is a bigger middle ground now. Girls of ten or so are now worried about skincare, make up and looks. But they spend longer at this stage well into their early 20s.
Today’s teens are used to having the answer to everything at their fingertips but they lack the critical thinking skills that come with having to work something out. Being able to phone your parents for the answer every time isn’t helpful.

When I was 17 (1992) I was applying to uni. I went all over the country on my own on the train to different interviews. No mobile phones, no way to call home of the train was delayed etc. However I remember saying to my mum that I was anxious about using the underground on my own (I’d been to London a couple of times but never alone) she told be not to be daft and that she was using it alone when she was 8. So it’s always been like this.

It's not COVID, though that's accelerated it.
It's protective parents, anxiety, and the vicious cycle of those two.

I also think kids look older now, my 12yo girl is almost as tall as me, she'd easily pass for 16. My 14yo would easily pass for 18. They may be younger than you think.

Ha! This! Teenagers today have different challenges but they seem broadly the same to me. Plus, there are many different types, just like there are many different types of 40 year olds.

As an example of how parents have different attitudes and possibly don't help their children become independent in thought and actions. Our scouts will now cancel a walk when it is raining a bit or if it is not raining but is forecast rain, parents will come onto the group chat and ask if the walk is going ahead because it might rain...there has been a new group leader this year and the old one, myself and some others preferred because they didnt mollycoddle the children and would take them out whatever the weather and let them use saws and knives etc...the current one made sock ornaments recently...

I just think people get to the age where their brain has fully developed and then they incorrectly start believing that those younger than them are far more immature than they ever were.

This is actually based on one poorly reported study. The human brain never stops developing, the study only ran up to age 25.

It was never a conclusion that we're somehow children until age 25. Also how do people think the brain develops? By learning. Baby people well into their twenties, and they won't learn vital adult skills during an important development window.

That being said, I do conversely find that at the younger ages, children seem to grow up very quickly now, especially girls. No longer interested in toys, and into make-up etc, from ages 8 and up. Remembering back we only made that switch at around 11/12 I think.

But the BBC news website ran a story about a vicar making 10/11 year old kids cry because he said Santa didn't exist in a re class. Cue upset parents.

If any of our class at 10, even the kids who were sen, believed in father Christmas they would have been destroyed by the piss taking!

I wonder if children believe in Father Christmas for longer as parents put way more effort in? Footsteps, reindeer poo, trips to Lapland....

My parents would put out a mince pie and a can of lager for Santa 😂

When I was teaching the usual age for children to stop believing in Santa was about 9. I have a friend who perpetuated the myth and the bloody elf until her daughter finished primary school at nearly 12.