Did I do the wrong thing keeping newborn’s hands covered ?

[Flowersandforests]

I’m a first time mum and MIL is making me start to doubt myself… my baby was born with quite sharp nails and scratched her face in the first night in hospital. Because of this & because I was nervous to try and cut her nails / between constant nappies and feeding it wasn’t top of my priority list, I used the inbuilt mitts on her baby grows and generally kept her hands covered for the first 5-6 weeks.

Shes now 12 weeks old so hasn’t had her hands covered for a while but every time MIL has seen her she’s made comments about how nice it is to see her hands and saying to the baby things like oh mummy kept your hands covered so grandma couldn’t see your hands etc.

Last night SiL was round and make a big deal about her hands not being covered now so clearly her and Mil have been talking about it.

It’s making me panic that I did the wrong thing? Should I have kept her hands uncovered straight away?

I used scratch mitts on my DC for the same reasons you did. If your MIL wanted to see her GC fingers surely she could have just taken the mitts off whilst holding them had a coo over their tiny fingers then put the mitts back on.

MIL is a dick.

However, you need to let baby have hands free for periods to explore and use them, it’s part of their sensory experience. The nails don’t get any less sharp!

New grandmother here (7months)🙋‍♀️
Your MIL & SIL are batshit!
There's a reason "scratch mits" are available to buy and the handcovering thingys are on baby grows, it's to stop them scratching themselves.
Everyone loves to see babies tiny fingers and toes, they're so cute but babies scratch and I've got the scratches to prove it 😄
Stick up for yourself, they're being passive aggressive to you, set your stall out or it'll get worse.
Next time, do it back to them, talk through the baby "oh baby aren't mil and sil silly, anyone would think I don't know what I'm doing, silly nana and aunty"
Be PA right back at them!

No, you didn't do the wrong thing. I covered my newborn's hands with mittens for exactly the same reason. People have been doing it for decades (I'm surprised your MIL was shocked by it); it doesn't damage them. Your baby will be fine and you're a good mum. Don't let your MIL and SIL's bitchy comments make you doubt yourself.

Ooh (baby's name) is nanny still going on about your hands how silly of her perhaps she needs a hobby yes she does! keep her busy!

I had the same criticisms off my exes family for not referring to ducks as quack quacks and cows as moo moos etc she decided I was doing dd a disservice by calling them ducks and cows dd was a very precocious speaker and when nanny said things like "look dd quack quacks" she would sigh heavily and say "nanny that's a duck" in the most adult tone ever this was an issue to them but it was their issue not mine

I had to keep DS's hands covered as he had eczema which he scratched, when he was a bit older his favourite toys were jigsaws and Lego so it didn't affect his hands.

Nothing wrong with it at all OP. I'd be tempted to do the passive aggressive talk-to-the-baby right back at her. 'Oh isn't granny being silly? Mummy just didn't want you to scratch your face off.'

My mum made a passive aggressive comment to my friend about the socks being too tight on her baby.
Oooh mummy my sockies are making marks on my leggies, something like that.
My friend was a first time mum.

The child is now 23 and my friend still remembers and mentions it occasionally.
These sort of comments stay.

TBh I think it a bit weird when people cover babies' hands for so long. But it isn't "wrong" and I wouldn't be rude enough to comment on it when I see it. Granny sounds a bit ridiculous.

Incidentally, if anyone is scared to cut a newborn's nails (fair enough) an easier alternative is to nibble them instead.

Mine had mitts on for about two months because she had extra fingers (one on each haha) and they weren't properly attached to her hands and she used to get them in her mouth. When the fingers were removed I took them off. She doesn't seem to have suffered in any way!

I've got one of those too OP. You won't win whatever you do, so pay it no mind. FWIW my baby's hands were covered similarly too as baby was a scratcher.

breastfeeding.support/scratch-mittens-and-breastfeeding/#:~:text=Scratch%20mittens%20are%20designed%20to,of%20touch%20with%20his%20hands.

Completely agree.

They are really weird

You married into a really weird family.

You are absolutely fine OP. I agree they’d have found something else to have a dig at you about! Sadly having kids means you often have to grow a thick skin, as a lot of people will feel entitled to views on things which are none of their business.

You didn't do anything wrong. If your MIL had a genuine concern about your baby's hands being covered she could have gently mentioned it to you in an adult way. I think she was just looking for something to get at you for.

Trust your instincts, your baby, your way 💐

Nope, my newborns hands were covered due to scratching, I just made sure to clean them or they were stinky mitts, and then we moved to a colder country when he was 6 weeks so he had them covered for warmth. He is perfectly dextrous and capable now at 17 months;)

Not a big deal in the slightest, they’re the weird ones.

Having parents that care about their children’s welfare and do their best to keep them safe and looked after is the most important thing. You’re clearly one of those ❤

Op, that’s literally what the mitts are for, you are NOT being unreasonable. My DS is 18 now, but I can still remember the utter terror at having to cut his tiny nails for the first time (in the end I chewed them off as advised by my DM 🤣)

Your MIL just sounds like “one of those” Mother in laws, creating power plays because she feels on the back foot with your DC simply because it wasn’t her own daughter that birthed your child.
You’ll find your voice with her op, you’re a new mum right now and you’ll probably be paranoid about many other things, but don’t let her be the reason you question yourself.
This is your baby, and only you know what’s best

This is a DH problem. He needs to supervise and nip these passive aggressive comments in the bud now if he’s expecting you to be in the same room as your MIL.

You did the right thing. You're her mum don't ever doubt your instincts and your decisions for your own child! Next time they say it just say "yes, lovely to see her hands but more important that she didn't scratch her fragile skin at the time with her sharp little nails, no damage done".

At my hospital they were really against scratch mitts, I don't know why but they advised us very strongly not to use them so we didn't (not in the UK). Maybe your MIL has read or heard something and is trying to help with a very ham-fisted and passive aggressive approach.

My ds is 40 now.When I took him to see my friend's dm ( he was a few weeks old) she pulled his dummy out and said he doesn't need that.
I wasn't upset as it was just an hours visit but I've never forgotten.
The dummy had been recommended by the MW as ds was using my boobs to soothe and I was getting v. sore.