Husband's cousin has called their son the same name as our son.

[shoulde]

Bit annoying considering they also share the same surname!

I know no one owns a name, but it's pretty annoying.

Aibu?

Going against the grain I think it is wierd but then again my ex husbands step brother used our sons name for his but he switched the first and middle name around what's even weirder my son was named after our grandparents so stepbrother technically named his son after his stepmother's first husbands father and my grandfather 😳

But yeah just names totally meaningless

Well we never see DH's cousins-they live in other bits of the country and our children have never really met so I vote YABU on that basis.

It has actually just occurred to me that my first cousin and my brother have the same first name.

I'm in my fifties, and I've never thought about it before. I'm pretty sure neither my brother nor my cousin give it any thought at all.

My son and brother share the same first name- but in families this is solved by a distinguishing prefix..like Big and Little

You should have called your son Jimberly.

Are they likely to come across one another in school etc?

You mention it as “our” surname so I am assuming you took your husband’s surname; if the cousins having the same name is more annoying than you can easily stand, could you and your husband consider changing to use your original surname instead for your own family? (Depending on your DC’s/DCs’ awareness of own full name).

Of course YABU - it's not annoying at all - two of my grandsons have the same name and we are all cool with it.

My cousin has the same first and last name as my sister. It’s spelt differently by one letter. I’m not sure why my aunt/ uncle chose the same name, I definitely wouldn’t. We don’t see them much so it’s not as bad as if we saw them regularly.

Yes it is weird - I have a cousin who has done the same which meant our nana had two grandchildren with same name. Rarer name too and it really pissed me off

This. Same first name and last name - fucking weird.

My cousin named her first child the same name as my husband, then her second child the same name as my daughter (a year or so apart) and if she doesn't name her third child after me I shall be most put out! 😂

In all seriousness, I haven't seen her for years so I'm really not bothered if our daughters have the same name. However, if we did see each other at all regularly and the surname was the same, I think I would be a bit annoyed.

Is there a backstory? Like you didn't always know that they always wanted a son called Freddie but then you got pregnant and used the name Freddie first and now you don't like that they've used it as well anyway?

You are definitely being unreasonable up until recently it was quite normal for there to be lots of names repeated within families, cousins/ nieces and nephews names the same as aunties and uncles etc it's quite new for people to pick a name that no one else even distantly related has.

But will they ever even meet? I can't say that I've ever met any of my second cousins, nor do I know how many I have or what their names are.

I don't even know who my partner's cousins are, let alone what they name their kids. in the real world this is an absolutely bonkers thing to be annoyed about.

This isn’t something I’d personally find weird or care about. My DS has the same name as my best friend form uni’s son. We were pregnant at the same time so very close in age. My son was born first and when she said she’d picked the same name, I said i hope she’d still go ahead and use it (which she did!) and tbh I would have still used it if it was the other way round (it was a family name for us).

It’s too distant a relation for me to be bothered about. If they were cousins it would be different I think, but really, how often does your husband see his cousin and their child? I barely think about mine and if they named their child the same name as mine I think I’d barely notice.

Its a total non issue unless you see each other lots and live very local to each other.
I am admittedly from a very large family, but several have the same, or very similar, names and no one gets confused or upset.

There must be some way to differentiate them. Maybe you could get them IQ tested and have "Clever Freddie" and "Thick Freddie"?

I like very classic, popular names. I have more than 30 1st cousins. If I excluded all their childrens names too (my 2nd cousins), where would it stop? Between my own grandparents, parents, siblings, nieces and nephews, aunts and uncles, 1st cousins etc then most of the classic, popular names (James, Charlotte, Thomas, William, Elizabeth type ones) have already been used!

OP It sucks that the DC will share a surname too (and presumably you will see them regularly or you wouldn’t be that upset?) but if it’s popular, very commonplace name then sorry I think you are being a bit unreasonable - your relatives might have had the name in mind for years (along with a lot of other people!)

I’ve liked a particular popular girls name for years- but it happens to be the name of one of my 2nd cousins (along with several hundred other girls born each year in the UK and probably millions total worldwide as it’s an absolute classic). If I hadn’t had a DS, I would still have considered using it 🤷‍♀️ (and btw my DS’s name has also been in the family 🤣, albeit one of his great- grandparents).

I’m guessing if you know your partner’s cousin has had a baby and what they’ve called it, you are close enough to know who your partner’s cousins are. So OP’s family obviously isn’t the same as yours and your real world experience.

My guess, given that the OP has not answered the many posters who have asked how close they are and how often the two children would see each other, they likely are not particularly close. We are being left to guess, though.

The closest to that in my family is that my cousin and I have the same middle name (a very common one for the decade we were born), but since we have different first names it's never been an issue.

When I was at primary school, let's say this guy in my class was Thomas Smith, and he had a cousin in the year below who was also Thomas Smith. Cousin Thomas went to a different secondary, and fell off most people's radar. Then Cousin Thomas died, and another classmate found out about it, thought it was Our Thomas, and announced Our Thomas's death in a Facebook group chat. Since most people hadn't kept in touch with Our Thomas, no one knew any different at first and there were a few upset people in the group chat before Our Thomas's best friend, who knew it was the cousin who had died, saw the message and clarified.

Enable voting as you are being so v unreasonable.

If they see each other a lot I'm sure they'll end up going by nicknames, e.g. if they are both named Oliver one will go by Ollie to differentiate between them.

My daughter hasn't met any of her second cousins so it wouldn't matter to me.

I'd feel put out too. I wouldn't say anything as it's done now but I'd put it in my imaginary grievance book.