Sister refuses to pay me back for money I loaned

[Anon777]

My sister borrowed £2.5k money from me on the premise she would pay it back.

Refuses to pay it back and keeps saying she is broke. She lives with parents with her own flat on rent and has a full-time job. My parents think I am wrong for even asking.

What can I do???

People here are trying to help you by asking if there has ever been an email etc, but you give no answer.
If you just wanted a moan, yes it's awful. Just forget it now if you don't want to cooperate.

Karma is real and generally people who behave like assholes get their just deserts eventually.

However one extra piece of advice I would give. Never, ever discuss your personal finances with people like this. If you want to retain the relationship (god knows why) then just tell them you haven't got any money and make up some plausible excuse.

Because you can pretty much bet your life at some point in the future they are going to come begging again for more.

If you have text messages from her replying to your request for repayment saying “I can’t afford it” rather than “I don’t owe you any money” would that be proof? I’d be tempted to take her to the small claims court. I’d certainly be cutting them all off.

So the sister works full time, gets £1,500 pm rental income, doesn’t pay and rent/mortgage, but she’s “broke”? How does she and your mother explain that? Two months’ rental income is more than enough to repay you.

If you haven't got it in writing I'd mention it in a WhatsApp message and goad her for a reply that acknowledges it, that may be enough to get a small claims court judgement.

Why did you lend her the money?

If your mum told you she would pay you back. Take her at her word. Ignore her protestations of being poor. She's not poor if she can keep giving SIL all that money on a regular basis. She can withold one of the payments and recoup what she's paid you.
Keep insisting.
After that, they've all been so horrible to you, I can't see how you benefit from continuing to stay in contact with them.
If you can't get it back, then write it off as the cost of learning that you need to keep away from them. And never, ever lend anyone, even a close friend or family member, money again without a written agreement.... and even then think twice, three times before you do.

Your sister sounds really odd. Is there something wrong with her? It isn't normal for an adult to pick their nose in front of other people. Does she have a job?

I'm not sure why you agreed to lend her the money. What could they do to you if you had said no? You are married and you don't live with them or rely on them for anything. They have no hold over you.

Live your life as though they don't even exist.

Have you any proof that you lent the money? Has she acknowledged the debt in messages or texts?

This isn’t nice. The OP will likely have conflicting emotions about her family after years of abuse.

I can never understand people who say just do this or that as if it was that easy. If it was that easy there would be no prolonged domestic abuse, grooming, child abuse etc.

If you go down the small claims court route, she may end up having a CCJ against her which will follow her around, whatever she ends up doing.

I'd consider going the route of the Small Claims Court and when she has repaid you (I wouldn't accept piece-meal amounts, it's the full amount in one go now) then and only then would I go No Contact. I'd do it with the whole family - mum and dad included. None of them even deserve the steam from your piss they have been that horrible to you.

Block them all.

When your oh so wonderful sister realises that you aren't going to be around to help (as in do it all) look after the parents, then you can sit back and have a nice cold drink as you enjoy the karma of her being the Golden Child while you manage to escape!

OP has said that she has nothing in writing.

Do you have anything in wiring regards you requesting the money back, her a,sing to borrow it etc?

If so I agree small claims court.

But you do need to go NC. I'm so sorry you've been treated this way.

Without meaning to sound horrendously callous and blunt - but your parents won't be around forever. Your sister will get her come uppance when you're still married to a decent earning decent DH and she no longer has her cash cows and worshippers around.

This is the answer, OP

Writing can even be a text,

Screen shot anything you have in writing confirming it's a loan and her refusing to pay, or try and get it in writing, and then go to the small claims court.

@Anon777 in scotland it is called a Simple Procedure and you just download the documents online. fill it in and return it to court. you dont need a solicitor but you will need the services of a sheriff officer to serve them (when they are returned from the court) on your sister. all fees are charged to your sister. cant understand why she cant pay because she will be getting rent from her tenants!! if she doesnt stump up the sheriff officers can lodge a wage arrestment or a bank arrestment.

How did you make the initial loan - bank transfer or cash?

Oh, and just an aside, you can break the emotional ties and leave them behind; you won't forget what they did but it won't hurt you anymore.

I would send her something like this by email (put a delivered and read request on the email so you know she's seen it) and slso send by recorded delivery.

Dear DSIS,

On xx date I loaned you £x amount on the understanding that it a. WAS a loan and b. Would be REPAID.
I now need the loan repaid IN FULL by 31 January 2025.
If the money remains unpaid after this date I will apply to the Small Claims Court in order to recover it. If my claim is successful this will affect your credit report and your potential to borrow money from official lenders in future. Something I expect you would wish to avoid.
I have proof of the loan , as I have the bank statement showing the money being transferred from my account to yours.
My bank account details are.......

Regards

I hope she is paying the correct tax on the unearned income of her flat. It would be awful if somebody informed the tax office 😉

I wouldn't speak to any of the toxic shits again.

@Anon777 if you are not going to follow through and go with the court system, I would actually make a phone call to hmrc and tell them she is receiving 15k rent per year and not declaring it. then phone the council and dob her in there too. bet she has not got all the necessary certificates to make the rental legal ie landlords annual gas safety cert. pat testing annual cert. 5 yearly electrical check cert. etc etc!!! hundreds of the things!! and depending on where you are, a 3 yearly landlord registration! all of those tests will take her to nearly 2k and she will wish she had just paid you back in the first place. then there is the tax, and hmrc will want to see every single piece of income and she will end up having to employ an accountant to get the books in order!!

Btw there is no email trail but an electronic bank transfer only.

This comment has helped me so much emotionally.
I'm in a real dark place because of them all right now.

I'd cut all ties with the lot of them. Write the money off and get on with your life without your miserable sister and parents.