Everyone just assumed they can bring their dogs with them for Christmas day ??

[caninechristmasconundrum]

In the last year 3 members of our family have got dogs (2 puppies 1 older rescue) . We always host for Christmas and I (maybe stupidly) assumed that dogs go to kennels or stay at home for the day ? I’ve never had pets before so will admit I don’t know much ! I don’t see why a few hours at home / in a crate is bad for dogs though? We don’t live that far away.

Seems they all expected to bring their dogs with them ???

After BIL and SIL made this clear and told us that ILs will be the same about their rescue dog I’ve sent a message to everyone saying ‘Really sorry but I think there may have been some confusion on my part and I assumed the dogs would all be left at home on Christmas day. We are not able to have them here due to personal preference, lack of space and the dc are still so little. You’re all still very welcome but I understand if it’s going to be a problem leaving the dogs at home so let me know what you’d like to do xx’

DH got messages back asking is it because of my ‘germ ocd’ (in part it is that’s why I put personal preference) and telling him he has a say in it too as it’s not just my house. He replied that he assumed the same and although we have the biggest house it’s not exactly huge and having 3 dogs there too will just be too much so he’s in total agreement with me (they aren’t small breeds and the puppies are at that into everything zooming about stage)

Is this the norm now that dogs go everywhere and are never left home for a few hours ? AIBU to want a dog free Christmas ?!

I love dogs although we don't have one- we do borrow my doggy

However I don't like multiple dogs there from different families at same time, so no OP I don't think you are being unreasonable at all -

A lot people a treating dogs more like children

😂as if the dog knows what the hell's going on!

@caninechristmasconundrum I’m a dog owner and wasn’t able t spend Christmas with parents because of dogs- even though they were very quiet and well trained .

YANBU

But as this thread shows, dogs are far nicer creatures than humans are.

No, it just shows how entitled some dog owners are.

Well she does admit to being bonkers!

Unfortunately some dogs actually end up stressed at christmas, especially if people humanise them and drag them around random houses.

When you choose to have a baby you accept your life will change, perhaps activities you once did will no longer be suitable because you have a baby, life does not continue as before and you accept that. Same if you choose to take on a dog, life changes and some places won’t welcome the dog- either you go without it (not an option with a baby really!) you get it looked after or you don’t go- just like when you have small children. If you don’t want life to change don’t get the dog!

We have the same problem and last year the dog scratched my new wooden floors- family member made no attempt to calm dog down. No apology, no awareness.

I've got a dog and can't believe how many people assume they can take their dogs absolutely everywhere . And doggy daycare. Never even used to be a thing when I was younger.
My friend uses doggy daycare at great expense for the 3 or 4 hours she's out at work each day. I don't get it. Dog is fine at home. Chill people. Dogs don't need to go everywhere with us. They're
not children.

I used to take my dog to my parents for Christmas but I knew he was welcome. I certainly wouldn't have taken him anywhere else without asking. He was a pet, not a child.

Having a baby isn't the same as getting a dog.

@caninechristmasconundrum so they contacted your DH and basically said that they didn’t care that the person who was most likely putting in the most effort to host them didn’t want their dogs there? They’d be happy to sit there eating your food, knowing you were unhappy? Good on your DH for wanting to cancel, that’s such a disrespectful thing for them to do.

Yes, it's cruel, expecting them to understand Christmas and adapt accordingly. Some owners are clueless.

From the point of view of your life changing and you having to make adjustments it is.

Obviously a pet is not a baby though.

Why can’t one of the dog friendly houses host instead then?

This. All of this.

That’s awful .
Mutt clearly never had it’s nails trimmed either.
They should have paid for a new floor- but doubt it was insured.

MiL seems to be stirring the pot 😒

Puppies and a rescue dog are likely to get really overstimulated in a big social gathering with young kids there. Your suggestion of leaving them all together at your SiL’s house was a good one- if these were my dogs I would take them for a really good walk- long and active, with a lot of sniffs on the way home as sniffing is calming for dogs- and then put them in separate rooms or crates with a chewy stick of some kind (also soothing for dogs). They should be tired and able to relax, then, and owners can pop in to check on them periodically. Much more appropriate than having them roaming around a strange house with people they don’t know that well, and possibly excitable humans making it even more stimulating.

It's not remotely comparable.

You are not being at all unreasonable and it is really good to read a thread where your DH has your back. If they don't like it they can stay at home.

Exactly!

Maybe they have done OP a favour and she never needs to host these entitled users again. ‘You need to remember it’s the dogs’ Christmas too’. What twaddle.

I'd let DH cancel. They sound rude and entitled.

They can either leave the dogs at home, leave them at SILs house or not come.

Amazing - so many people (on a variety of issues, not just pets) rely on other people not standing up to them taking the piss. Absolutely ridiculous to agree to not bring the dog and then turn up with it anyway.

I’ve got a dog and would never presume they are invited to someone's house! YANBU. Why can’t SIL host, and family and all dogs go there? You said u host every year. Time for a break from hosting OP 😀