Everyone just assumed they can bring their dogs with them for Christmas day ??

[caninechristmasconundrum]

In the last year 3 members of our family have got dogs (2 puppies 1 older rescue) . We always host for Christmas and I (maybe stupidly) assumed that dogs go to kennels or stay at home for the day ? I’ve never had pets before so will admit I don’t know much ! I don’t see why a few hours at home / in a crate is bad for dogs though? We don’t live that far away.

Seems they all expected to bring their dogs with them ???

After BIL and SIL made this clear and told us that ILs will be the same about their rescue dog I’ve sent a message to everyone saying ‘Really sorry but I think there may have been some confusion on my part and I assumed the dogs would all be left at home on Christmas day. We are not able to have them here due to personal preference, lack of space and the dc are still so little. You’re all still very welcome but I understand if it’s going to be a problem leaving the dogs at home so let me know what you’d like to do xx’

DH got messages back asking is it because of my ‘germ ocd’ (in part it is that’s why I put personal preference) and telling him he has a say in it too as it’s not just my house. He replied that he assumed the same and although we have the biggest house it’s not exactly huge and having 3 dogs there too will just be too much so he’s in total agreement with me (they aren’t small breeds and the puppies are at that into everything zooming about stage)

Is this the norm now that dogs go everywhere and are never left home for a few hours ? AIBU to want a dog free Christmas ?!

People who treat dogs as humans aren't "dog lovers" IMO. People who truly love dogs, realise they are animals and treat them as such.

How profound…. @OonaStubbs
In another comment you were saying, dog owners are weird.
That’s your assumption, just because someone chooses to have a dog, they think it’s a person, er no, it’s quite clear what your stance is, you just don’t like dogs🤷‍♀️

@OonaStubbs have any of us dog owners said our dogs are treated like humans?

We always used to when visiting my grandparents for Xmas. But, had there been more than one dog coming and more than just 6 people, we would have been okay leaving them for max 4 hours at home after a good walk with the radio on.

@Username2532 you really don't understand relationships between many pets and their owners do you? Or the way attitudes by some dog owners have changed dramatically over the last few years for that matter.

You refer up thread about "dog-friendly places", aside from this thread originally being about someone insisting on bringing their dog to a NON-dog friendly place.
Every year you get more and more people assuming that all open land is welcoming to dogs, let off the lead. So every year we get more and more news stories about sheep being worried and aborting their lambs, or being injured by dogs let off their leads.
More and more people assume that all parts of a public park are "dog friendly" and let their dogs free to "play" with small children in a fenced off play area, often with the result of children being scared or knocked over.
More and more people assume that signs saying "dogs must be kept on leads" don't apply to them, because their dogs are generally "well behaved".
Some shops now let people bring dogs in because they have lost the will to fight people insisting on bringing dogs into shops however inappropriate, then screaming how dreadful and nasty that shop is (often lying about unrelated aspects of the shop).

There are many places that people take their dogs to now that were never considered to be "dog friendly", it just ended up that so many people just took their dogs everywhere with them that seeing lots of dogs in these places became the "norm". O0ften places that are inappropriate for the dog as well as other users of the place, like crowded shopping markets - I've very nearly trodden on or unintentionally kicked small dogs in the past as they've made a sudden dash across a crowded aisle at a market and you just can't see them.

I love dogs, one of my biggest regrets about my current back issues is I can't rough house with my friend's GSDs, or bend down for long to fuss smaller dogs. But I recognise that some dogs CAN be total twats, badly behaved, over boisterous etc. Doesn't stop them being loved by their owners & often others as well, just means they can be a pita and the owner is aware enough to recognise it. Posters on here can talk about their partners being a prat and mention certain very annoying traits, or being very exasperated at the behaviours of teens & using the odd derogatory term about them - doesn't mean they don't love them, so why can't they say the same about their pets? It's actually quite appropriate in regards to this thread - the owners recognise that though they love their dogs, these behaviours are more likely to be unwelcomed by others.

I agree with you that there have been a few generalisations on this thread which have implied "all", but you are just as guilty of that in your assumption that "all" owners who call their pets rude names can't love them.

TL : DR What's now considered to be dog friendly is more down to the recent influx of people taking their dogs there regardless. You can recognise that any pet (or person) can have annoying behaviours and still love them.

People saying that their dogs are part of the family is treating them like humans. As is buying them Christmas presents, taking them to human places etc. Dogs should be treated as animals.

😂sorry just in stitches laughing, l don’t understand the thread, er in your anonymous opinion.I really can’t be bothered to justify my comments to you, l don’t need to give a monologue like you felt the need to.The matter as been resolved with op, yet the comments still keep coming about dogs, the thread early on was just another thread to slate all dogs, instead of staying on the topic on people assuming it’s ok to take their dogs to someone else home, uninvited.Swiftly moving on from this, where posters are getting increasingly angry, that dogs are allowed to go to dog friendly places, that’s why its been mentioned many times, if you have a problem with businesses who legally allow dogs onto their premises, please take it up with them and usually if you’re more aware of your surroundings, tends to stop, accidents of tripping over dogs or anyone really.
Anyway busy day, just to clarify just because you don’t agree with someone’s comments doesn’t mean they don’t understand @Allergictoironing they just have a different view to yours.

ODFOD 🥱

Re. Dog friendly places - I actually agree that people should raise it with organisations if they’re not happy with dogs being there. Instead of just simmering in silence.

I feel the dog lobby is often more proactive and loud so some business feel they must welcome them because they are just worrying about losing customers who want to bring dogs. And in fairness to dog owners if it’s dog friendly I guess they’re doing nothing wrong in their mind by bringing their dog along.

However if owners knew they’d be losing some business, they may think twice. There’s not one cafe in my area that’s dog free, as a result I’ve simply stopped going! If one was dog free I’d probably go every other day for a cappuccino since I WFH but could always do with stretching my legs. But then they may see it as dog walkers are more reliable for business or whatever so they don’t mind losing a few customers like me which is fine.

A shopping centre in Scotland ran a dog friendly trial. Lots of people including dog owners expressed their objections on social media including that it was unfair for other people and unfair for the dogs themselves as many wouldn’t enjoy it.

The trial actually got SO many complaints - mainly about dog urine and faeces that they pulled it and now the shopping centre is dog free again.

People should indeed speak up more - although I have a couple of times and it’s not helped so I can see how it feels pointless!

@vodkaredbullgirl

are you saying that that they aren’t animals?!

I’d leave my dog for a few hours but not longer so it would be visit them off for me. I hate long visits at Christmas anyway. Anything longer than 3 hours and I’m bored shitless.

😂 l don’t think that acronym has anything to do with the subject of dogs.

Ah right so giving my dog some boninos on christmas day and taking him the pub on a walk means I'm treating him like a human? Is that how you treat your kids? Think you need to do better.

YANBU to not want dogs in your home, but Christmas can be difficult for dog owners to find care. No doggy day care and dog walkers are unlikely to work Christmas day. If we're out for a full day, we usually ask our neighbour to pop in and feed/let out for a wee/play with the dog for a bit. But she tends to hosts Xmas day so it's not really fair to ask.

Really? I feel you're being intentionally obtuse there.

Personally I wouldn't be feeding any kids on Bonios or taking them to the pub on a Friday for that matter - what's appropriate for one thing isn't always appropriate for another.

Expecting that your dog be allowed to go everywhere that you do and that they will enjoy it, as will everyone else there, is just a little unreasonable. Newsflash - many people think it's unhygienic to have dogs in places serving open food. And people don't tend to try to steal food off total stranger's plates either.

People don't tend to bite if they get over-excited or worried, nor do they jump up on people who are scared & traumatise them, though there are many dogs out there who do these things, hence why there are places where dogs aren't allowed - lets call these places "human friendly" shall we?

It seems that many posters on here want to treat dogs exactly the same as humans (whether the dog will enjoy the experience or not, or even if it could be harmful to the dog). There doesn't seem to be any centre ground or balance from some owners here, the realisation that it's a matter of degree rather than all or none. Of course we love our pets, want to treat them occasionally, want them to enjoy their lives, but on the other hand many realise that dogs are biologically and in thought process VERY different from humans and treat them accordingly.

And if this is expected for dogs, what's the next type of pet that we extend these courtesies to? Fancy a snake at the dinner table? Happy to see someone carrying a tank along with their pet tarantula in it, or with their alligator on a lead going for a walk in the kid's playground? Yes I know these are extreme examples, but a line has to be drawn and everyone's line is in a slightly different place, and as a civilisation we needs to show some understanding of other people's lines.

Didn't even finish reading all that

I am well aware my dog is a dog. He only goes to places he is allowed when he is with us. He doesn't go to people's houses unless they invite him. It's never asked or expected.

I have already said the op isn't being unreasonable. But this bs about 'treating dogs like humans' because they are a member of your family or you take them to places other than a walk, are just stupid.

Oh and cats are members of my family too. I have just lost one after nearly 17 years. I was 19 when I had him. He was with me that whole time and although a cat, treated like a cat, he was part of my family. Ask my kids if they thought him so too. They'd tell you the same.

I hope you still show him he's loved, and care for him.
Not "it".
You are the only home he's ever known, and his only family. You are his people, his pack.
I understand you are stretched and mentally disconnected. But he didn't ask for that, so hopefully he still feels loved. Especially if he's nearing end of life.

I wandered off and missed the consternation about saying my dog is a twat. Rest assured he is very much loved and cared for (despite never being taken to John Lewis to browse handbags). I note fellow spaniel-owners, amongst others, recognise that this is a term of endearment and not proof he spends his life picking oakum in a puddle in the back garden and having potato peelings emptied over his head twice a day.

Calling your dog a twat, when you can see how much anger there is towards dogs on this thread really didn’t help, having a dig at other dog owners, who choose to take their dogs to places where they’re welcome, purely because you don’t agree.This had nothing to do with the original post.As someone who has a 19 year old Miniature Jack Russel, like so many other dog owners agree with op, so why the thread turned to people, feeling the need to say dogs aren’t human, getting angry about going to places where dogs are welcome, it was just a pile on, of posters saying the same thing.As far as John Lewis, can’t say l’ve ever been there with my dog, but l will meet up with friends have a cuppa in a cafe with my dog after a walk, or a pub, because we’re welcome, that’s the difference to the original post @PigglyWigglyOhYeah

It's her dog, she can refer to it how she likes. I doubt that the dog will mind.

I have 3 dogs and I'm sick to death of shopping, eating, walking through a town and there are just blinking dogs everywhere.

In white company today.. 3 dogs, all brushing up against the clothes all just bored shitless.

So OP I'm with you, why should they assume the dogs are coming, and yes most dogs are fine alone for 4hours if exercised and happy.

Are you feeling OK?

@Freeyourminds

im not sure @Freeyourminds is ok?!
i mean, not everyone gives a shit about their friends and family’s dog. I mean, at the end of the day..they are…just dogs!! Not in the same league as humans!

My dog is a lot better than some humans

I don't think he'd ever drive a car through a Christmas market or anything like that

My doggo is part of the family. I wouldn't assume l could bring her l would check but if the answer was no l would be staying put with her.